Bitter Sweet
Falling From Grace
The Doctor threw his jacket onto the console – a disappointed look on his face. He flicked the TARDIS switches despairingly, then breathed in deeply trying to pull himself together…
“Come on, Doctor, get a grip…”
He ran his fingers through his hair and down his face, dragging his eyelids down. He leaned on the central control, closing his eyes for a moment; then he snapped them open again. He pulled himself upright and forced himself to walk down to the kitchen. He needed to do something, anything - even though all he wanted to do was sit with his head in his hands. He went through the kitchen door and pressed the silver button beside the endowave, before opening a cupboard and pulling out a hot, rainbow-striped mug of tea. The Doctor held it between his hands, feeling its warmth then wandered out of the door and started down the corridor.
“Ah. Free radicals and tannin…” He took a sip, “Bleugh!” He shook his head and remembered he’d forgotten to put in the, “Milk.”
_________________________________* * *
Maria was still hidden, but the sobbing had stopped. She couldn’t cry anymore, it was as if all the tears had been wept out of her body. It was worse, not crying, she felt like she had to way to express her grief. It was all bottled up inside, driving her mad. Then there was the loneliness – pressing in, crushing her. She couldn’t see a way out; everything kept telling her to stay out, to go away…
“Where do I go?” she asked, but she didn’t know what she was asking - the stars, the moon, the sky?
It didn’t matter, because nothing answered. She turned behind her and from her vantage point she could see all the people in the city going home and not one of them could see her, the little lost girl on the roof of an abandoned workplace. Maria looked forward and saw the roof of the building spanning out before her, and its blunt edge. There was no banister, though it was a high building. Then she had a realisation, there was one way. The last way…
_________________________________* * *
The Doctor turned around and headed back towards the kitchen. His hand, with it’s long, strong fingers, curled round the door handle. He pressed down, the door opened… but the room he saw, wasn’t what he expected. This room had deep purple and cream walls. This room had a cream 4-poster bed. This room had a glass video frame. This room wasn’t the kitchen. The time-traveller’s eyes widened to startling proportions. It wasn’t just that there was a new room where the kitchen had been, that happened periodically in the TARDIS anyway, but it was a room he’d hadn’t seen before… and that never happened.
He walked into the room; and straight away almost fell over. He looked behind him and saw a step down onto the carpet,
“And where’s the ‘Warning - Step’ sign?” he muttered, looking at the cream fur carpet.
The Doctor looked around, absentmindedly putting his mug down on a chest of drawers. He spotted the video frame for a second time and strode around the bed towards it. There was a girl, with long brown hair being blown everywhere; The girl… dark hair. She ran along a beach with bare feet, screaming with laughing as she looked behind her. Behind her a man appeared in the frame; a man with brown hair too, with a long coat streaming behind him as he ran, shouting something at the girl which made her run even faster… the film shook as if the person behind it was laughing. They were smiling, laughing with pure, unadulterated happiness, as the man whisked the girl off her feet and swung her round… and the video clip started again…
_________________________________* * *
Maria stood up painfully, shifting the boxes and walked slowly but deliberately to the edge of the roof. There she stood, slim and willowy, gazing out onto the beautiful city.
_________________________________* * *
The Doctor sat down suddenly on the bed, a sick feeling in his gut. This was something even he didn’t understand – and it was that feeling again, the same feeling as when he’d looked at Maria and heard her name. It was… impossible. It was him. Him and Maria, laughing, playing on a beach on Laylora, he recognised it now. But… it just was not possible. He hadn’t done that, he knew he hadn’t done that, he’d never met Maria before. Then he saw it, plain as day in front of his face - this was Maria’s bedroom, it had to be. It made more and more sense every second he thought about it. Finally, he was speaking her language.
“Keep my room, if you want… I won’t need it…”
That’s what she had meant… here was her room, in the TARDIS and well, she blatantly, wasn’t.
What else had she said? His brain was in overdrive now. What else hadn’t he understood? Maybe this was the key… what else? The first thing she’d said…
“It was me.”
She claimed that she’d started the time rotor. Then, later, in when she’d been talking so fast he could barely tell what she was saying.
“With the whole… steering the TARDIS thing…”
The Doctor leapt up, ruffling his hair with excitement. Oh, his brain was on fire! She said she’d steered the TARDIS, she’d made the time rotor work.
He began to talk, very, very fast to himself, “So if I take her at her word, then she steered the TARDIS. Okay… but this little beauty is the only TARDIS in existence, and I know she wasn’t in this one. So she can’t have been. Oh no, unless…” he paused, but only for a second, “Unless… she was steering this one. Only in a different time zone, a parallel universe perhaps, and dematerialised that ship on top of this ship…” A mixture of pain, outrage and incredulation showed on The Doctor’s face, “Oh, honestly! How can she not have realised about the Time Ram? She could have killed us! Probably should have, if I’m honest…” Then he froze, tailing off, thinking back to the strange reaction he’d had when Maria had said her name, “That name… Why did I go all weird at that name? Oh… Oh ho ho-o! Right!” And with that, he marched out of Maria’s room and straight down the corridor to the TARDIS control room.
The Doctor swung the TARDIS screen out to face him and began to frantically search for the right programme. It had been near on 700 years since he’d used it, since he’d switched it onto automatic. He supposed, because it had been her name, it had missed it when she told him. Good job he could find out manually. There it was, the programme… He swung the keyboard round and typed it in carefully. M - A - R - I - A - Space - D - U - L - C - E - A - Enter. He flourished his long fingers as the ship whirred. Then it came up,
MARIA DULCEA
Translation:
BITTER SWEET
Language:
OLD EARTH, SPANISH
_________________________________* * *
Maria was still stood on the edge of factory, watching the sun setting. She had an odd feeling of calm, although it was all still there – the grief, the loneliness, the overwhelming feeling of not belonging… there was a way to fix it. She looked down to the ground - it was so, so far away and she looked until she couldn’t look anymore. That was her fate. Then she looked up again, at the beauty of the sunset, that bright light going down on a world – leaving it in darkness. That’s what he had done to her… left her in the darkness, for he had been her sun, her bright light and people cannot live with their sun. Then suddenly she screamed. She stood there on the roof and screamed his name.
“Doctor! Doctor!”
It was a scream of pain, of pent-up rage, a cry for salvation, a call for healing… and he heard it. He stopped looking the scene in front of him and ran. He didn’t even grab his coat or jacket, he just ran… faster than he’d even thought he could before.
Maria stretched out her arms, and let out a sigh. Making sure her feet were at the very edge of the building, she closed her eyes. Then she tipped the balance, and began to fall through the air below.
He could feel it, the fall – the fear and the release. He jumped down the monument steps, racing towards the factory…
“Come on, Doctor, get a grip…”
He ran his fingers through his hair and down his face, dragging his eyelids down. He leaned on the central control, closing his eyes for a moment; then he snapped them open again. He pulled himself upright and forced himself to walk down to the kitchen. He needed to do something, anything - even though all he wanted to do was sit with his head in his hands. He went through the kitchen door and pressed the silver button beside the endowave, before opening a cupboard and pulling out a hot, rainbow-striped mug of tea. The Doctor held it between his hands, feeling its warmth then wandered out of the door and started down the corridor.
“Ah. Free radicals and tannin…” He took a sip, “Bleugh!” He shook his head and remembered he’d forgotten to put in the, “Milk.”
_________________________________* * *
Maria was still hidden, but the sobbing had stopped. She couldn’t cry anymore, it was as if all the tears had been wept out of her body. It was worse, not crying, she felt like she had to way to express her grief. It was all bottled up inside, driving her mad. Then there was the loneliness – pressing in, crushing her. She couldn’t see a way out; everything kept telling her to stay out, to go away…
“Where do I go?” she asked, but she didn’t know what she was asking - the stars, the moon, the sky?
It didn’t matter, because nothing answered. She turned behind her and from her vantage point she could see all the people in the city going home and not one of them could see her, the little lost girl on the roof of an abandoned workplace. Maria looked forward and saw the roof of the building spanning out before her, and its blunt edge. There was no banister, though it was a high building. Then she had a realisation, there was one way. The last way…
_________________________________* * *
The Doctor turned around and headed back towards the kitchen. His hand, with it’s long, strong fingers, curled round the door handle. He pressed down, the door opened… but the room he saw, wasn’t what he expected. This room had deep purple and cream walls. This room had a cream 4-poster bed. This room had a glass video frame. This room wasn’t the kitchen. The time-traveller’s eyes widened to startling proportions. It wasn’t just that there was a new room where the kitchen had been, that happened periodically in the TARDIS anyway, but it was a room he’d hadn’t seen before… and that never happened.
He walked into the room; and straight away almost fell over. He looked behind him and saw a step down onto the carpet,
“And where’s the ‘Warning - Step’ sign?” he muttered, looking at the cream fur carpet.
The Doctor looked around, absentmindedly putting his mug down on a chest of drawers. He spotted the video frame for a second time and strode around the bed towards it. There was a girl, with long brown hair being blown everywhere; The girl… dark hair. She ran along a beach with bare feet, screaming with laughing as she looked behind her. Behind her a man appeared in the frame; a man with brown hair too, with a long coat streaming behind him as he ran, shouting something at the girl which made her run even faster… the film shook as if the person behind it was laughing. They were smiling, laughing with pure, unadulterated happiness, as the man whisked the girl off her feet and swung her round… and the video clip started again…
_________________________________* * *
Maria stood up painfully, shifting the boxes and walked slowly but deliberately to the edge of the roof. There she stood, slim and willowy, gazing out onto the beautiful city.
_________________________________* * *
The Doctor sat down suddenly on the bed, a sick feeling in his gut. This was something even he didn’t understand – and it was that feeling again, the same feeling as when he’d looked at Maria and heard her name. It was… impossible. It was him. Him and Maria, laughing, playing on a beach on Laylora, he recognised it now. But… it just was not possible. He hadn’t done that, he knew he hadn’t done that, he’d never met Maria before. Then he saw it, plain as day in front of his face - this was Maria’s bedroom, it had to be. It made more and more sense every second he thought about it. Finally, he was speaking her language.
“Keep my room, if you want… I won’t need it…”
That’s what she had meant… here was her room, in the TARDIS and well, she blatantly, wasn’t.
What else had she said? His brain was in overdrive now. What else hadn’t he understood? Maybe this was the key… what else? The first thing she’d said…
“It was me.”
She claimed that she’d started the time rotor. Then, later, in when she’d been talking so fast he could barely tell what she was saying.
“With the whole… steering the TARDIS thing…”
The Doctor leapt up, ruffling his hair with excitement. Oh, his brain was on fire! She said she’d steered the TARDIS, she’d made the time rotor work.
He began to talk, very, very fast to himself, “So if I take her at her word, then she steered the TARDIS. Okay… but this little beauty is the only TARDIS in existence, and I know she wasn’t in this one. So she can’t have been. Oh no, unless…” he paused, but only for a second, “Unless… she was steering this one. Only in a different time zone, a parallel universe perhaps, and dematerialised that ship on top of this ship…” A mixture of pain, outrage and incredulation showed on The Doctor’s face, “Oh, honestly! How can she not have realised about the Time Ram? She could have killed us! Probably should have, if I’m honest…” Then he froze, tailing off, thinking back to the strange reaction he’d had when Maria had said her name, “That name… Why did I go all weird at that name? Oh… Oh ho ho-o! Right!” And with that, he marched out of Maria’s room and straight down the corridor to the TARDIS control room.
The Doctor swung the TARDIS screen out to face him and began to frantically search for the right programme. It had been near on 700 years since he’d used it, since he’d switched it onto automatic. He supposed, because it had been her name, it had missed it when she told him. Good job he could find out manually. There it was, the programme… He swung the keyboard round and typed it in carefully. M - A - R - I - A - Space - D - U - L - C - E - A - Enter. He flourished his long fingers as the ship whirred. Then it came up,
MARIA DULCEA
Translation:
BITTER SWEET
Language:
OLD EARTH, SPANISH
_________________________________* * *
Maria was still stood on the edge of factory, watching the sun setting. She had an odd feeling of calm, although it was all still there – the grief, the loneliness, the overwhelming feeling of not belonging… there was a way to fix it. She looked down to the ground - it was so, so far away and she looked until she couldn’t look anymore. That was her fate. Then she looked up again, at the beauty of the sunset, that bright light going down on a world – leaving it in darkness. That’s what he had done to her… left her in the darkness, for he had been her sun, her bright light and people cannot live with their sun. Then suddenly she screamed. She stood there on the roof and screamed his name.
“Doctor! Doctor!”
It was a scream of pain, of pent-up rage, a cry for salvation, a call for healing… and he heard it. He stopped looking the scene in front of him and ran. He didn’t even grab his coat or jacket, he just ran… faster than he’d even thought he could before.
Maria stretched out her arms, and let out a sigh. Making sure her feet were at the very edge of the building, she closed her eyes. Then she tipped the balance, and began to fall through the air below.
He could feel it, the fall – the fear and the release. He jumped down the monument steps, racing towards the factory…