Happiness and Heartbreak

“The wedding’s off.”

“What? Why? I’m going to fuck Jack up for doing this.” Alex yelled, pulling me into a hug.

“Don’t do anything that you’re going to regret, ok Alex? Just…let me go. I’ll work things out for myself.”

“I fucking knew it.” Zack muttered, giving me a sympathetic look before he too gave me a hug, and then Rian.

“I’m just going to go find a hotel and then I’m leaving tomorrow morning. It was good seeing you guys. I guess I’ll see you again when you get home in three months.”

“Catie, don’t go. Stay, won’t you. We’ve missed you.”

“I really don’t think I need to be here right now, ok. I just need to go figure some stuff out for myself, ok. I promise I won’t do anything stupid. I love you guys.”

“Just call me when you get home ok. I’m calling you after the venue tonight and coming over to your hotel to see you.” Alex said, giving me another hug before letting me go.

I heard him mumble to Rian and Zack that I was strong, to let me go. This time I wasn’t so sure how strong I was though.

I fell into my hotel room, by now I had completely broken down into sobs which were getting me very strange and sympathetic looks in the hallways. I could care less right now. I stepped into the kitchen of the hotel and opened the mini fridge. Within an hour the mini fridge had been drained of all the alcohol in it. So much for promising Alex I wouldn’t do anything stupid. I continued to sob, lying on the couch with the TV on. The next thing I woke up to was pounding and frantic yelling outside my door. Of course, Alex had said he was coming over after the show. I forgot. Slowly, I made my way to the door, starting to sober up.

“Hello…” I pulled the door open, allowing Alex, Rian and Zack to rush into my room.

“What the hell have you been…Catie it reeks of alcohol in here. Please tell me that you haven’t drank that much liquor since you got here.” Alex shouted, looking at the empty bottles on the counter and by the couch.

“I could say I haven’t…”

“Damn it! Catie, get a hold of yourself. This isn’t you, what happened?”

“Alex, my life just fell apart. The guy that I love more than anything in the world ended it. Did you know that I was ready for this wedding. I have my dress already. I’ve been talking to a wedding planner and Jack and I already have our venue and our honeymoon paid for. Now it’s gone, never coming back. You have no idea how much it hurts. I don’t want to be here anymore.”

“Catie, come here.” Zack said, pulling me into his arms.

“Everything will be ok, just wait and see.” He muttered into my ear.

“Do you want us to stay the night with you?” Rian asked, looking around for a phone in the room to call room service.

“If we’re staying we need a room upgrade. I’m calling down to the front desk. We’ll pay for it.” Zack said as Alex grabbed my bags back up.

“Ok they have a suite with two rooms so Catie you take the bed, Rian and Alex can have the other room and they said they would bring up a roll out cot for me.”

Zack went downstairs to the front desk and picked up our key, and Rian and Alex grabbed my bags and helped me to out new room on the fifth floor. As soon as we got in the room, I collapsed into a bed and slept. Sometime during the night the guys called Jack to let them know where they were and when I woke up the next morning the first thing I saw was him sitting on the foot of my bed matching me sleep. That was all it took for me to start crying again.

“Shh, Catie. Will you just listen to me? I know you’re pissed but-“

“No, Jack. I’m not pissed, I’m hurt, ok. How could you do this?”

“Look, I just…Catie I’m not sure that you’re the one for me ok. Maybe it’s because we never see each other, I don’t really know. Hell, I may be making the biggest mistake of my life, but I have to see.”

“Jack, just get out of my room, or better yet, get out of my life.”

I got out of bed and watched Jack walk into the living room. I brushed my teeth and pulled up my hair before walking in to join the others.

“I’m leaving in fifteen minutes. Will one of you guys call me a taxi?”

“Yeah I got it.” Alex said, picking up the phone.

I went back to my room and picked up my things, putting them back in my duffel bag. It was time to go home and continue my life. I would graduate school with a degree in music engineering this semester and was planning to work on Warped Tour this summer. Matt had to leave and the boys had offered me his job. Now, I wasn’t even sure I wanted to do that. I left the hotel and said goodbye to the boys, I would see them all at home in one month. Maybe I would have a chance to recover before I had to see them again. When I left, Jack wasn’t there.