Goodbye Blues

"I don't know what's been causing you to act the way you have been, Joy," The nurse said from the doorway as Joy made her way to bed. "But whatever it is, you better get past it. I don't like your attitude."

With that, the nurse rudely stomped off, shutting the door to a close, leaving Joy with her sour thoughts. Ever since she had fallen upon that haunting picture, her mind had been clouded with the bad memories; the bad memories that wouldn't go away, that Joy had tried so hard to bury deep into the very back of her head, covered by sweet, happy thoughts.

But now that Joy had been reminded, it was too hard not to think about it.

Tears began stinging the back of Joy's eyes, but she fought them back and let her mind wander to her story which was luckily at a merry point.

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"To the first night of tour!"

A loud cheer erupted from the long table in the small, dark and elegant Chinese restaurant that was crowded with all the musicians and a smiling Joy. They all raised their glasses of various beverages and downed them gracefully, all shining bright with excitement - especially The Hush Sound.

"What should we do to celebrate?" Pete asked from beside Joy as he let his chopsticks pick up whatever they pleased from his plate and gladly shoving it into his mouth. Everyone pondered as The Hush Sound and Joy stared curiously.

"Something special for the newbies," William replied warm-heartedly yet smiling mischievously. His eyes met Joy's as he took his a sip of his diet coke, the smile never fading.

"Of course, of course," Pete said. He countered William's sneaky smile with bright, evil eyes. It was as if they were reading each other's minds, both planning a crazy night that Joy would never forget in that one moment. "But what is there in the boarders of Illinois?"

"Not much," David Blaise grumbled as he chewed on his orange chicken. William and Pete stared at each other, both minds focused on trying to find the perfect spot to celebrate the special night. Suddenly, William smiled wide and pulled out his phone, texting rapidly on the iPhone then shoving it into his pocket. A moment later, Joy felt Pete's pocket vibrate against her leg.

He pulled out the phone, read the text, then smiled and nodded towards William, ignoring the audience around him - all of them staring at them with odd expressions upon their faces. Nonchalantly, he went back to eating. William pulled out his phone again, sent another text, and Joy watched as every young man in This Providence, Panic at the Disco, Fall Out Boy, and The Academy Is... pulled out their phones and read what Joy could only assume was the same text message.

And in that same moment, Joy's eyes welcomed the scary sight of all those males, smiling wide, the same look that Pete had in their eyes from before.

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"Where are we going?" Greta asked as the huge group of people made their way down a crowded street. Cars zoomed by as pretty girls in short dresses and beautiful boys in True Religions and nice button up shirts got out of parked cars. They were all headed the same direction.

"You'll see," Ryan said, looking straight ahead with that same smile on his face. The boys had advised The Hush Sound and Joy to dress up for the occasion, so the huge group of musicians and the one outcast were quite a sight to see.

Every boy was wearing nice clothes, all outfits showing a spark of their personalities. Greta was dressed up in a strapless black dress that came to her knees, with flats and a golden necklace, her long curly hair straightened. Joy looked wonderful herself, in a black and white silk dress that dropped into a low v-neck and came up to her mid-thigh. She wore flats herself and matching white and black earrings, her long, dark hair down and straightened as always.

As the good-looking group of people made their way down the street, Joy kept her eyes on Brendon. He was talking to Dan, smiling wide, his dark hair looking perfect under the streetlights. He wore a light blue button up shirt, tight, black, skinny jeans and simple black vans. Although it was a rather plain outfit, when Joy first laid her eyes upon him in the get-up, she couldn't help but blush.

And the blush still hadn't faded her cheeks as they turned on the corner to see a long line of people waiting to get into a building with a sign on it, in yellow lights that read, "The Room."

"The Room?" Greta asked confused, reading Joy's mind.

"Yeah! The hottest club on the boarder of Illinois," Pete explained, smiling wide. Greta and Joy exchanged looks as all the guys looked towards them and The Hush Sound.

"Club?" Joy and Greta asked in unison. The looks on their faces were also similar, both looking incredibly disgusted and a little outraged that this was the way they were going to be spending their night.

"Yeah," Pete said slowly and bluntly, looking towards the guys. They either weren't paying attention or just shrugged at the girls' reactions. Joy sighed.

"Do Greta and I look like the girls who go clubbing?" Joy asked simply, shooting Pete a look. Pete's expression didn't change - he was taken aback, his mouth slightly ajar. He began stuttering like a fool, his eyebrows furrowed until William came to the rescue.

"Oh, come on, girls," He said charmingly, "It'll be fun. Drinking, dancing, getting to know each other's wild sides." At this point, a slight smirk had appeared on his face, sending chills down Joy's spine.

"We're underaged, Will," Greta said. William rolled his eyes, but the smirk remained as he said, simply and cunningly, "You may be, but most of us aren't."

And like that, Greta was found speechless. Joy looked at her, hoping she'd have another excuse up her sleeve so she wouldn't have to spend her time in an over-crowded room with a bunch of strangers. But Greta shrugged and Joy found herself walking past the huge line with everyone else, over to the security guards.

Pete took his wallet out of his pocket and showed a card to the guard who immediately opened entrance into the club. Joy felt a little sick to her stomach, feeling out of place. She wondered if Greta felt equally as bad as they all walked into the dark, humid room with booming music.

William and Pete took the lead, everyone following them to the bar. Joy and Greta stood behind the boys timidly, watching them order and laugh.

"This doesn't feel right," Greta said into Joy's ear loudly over the music. Joy nodded, looking at all the guys. She looked over to her brother, who was laughing with Bob. They both had drinks in their hands, probably ordered by someone else in the other bands. Joy wondered how they felt so comfortable being in this environment, illegally drinking with boys they had just met.

"Ladies," William's voice came. Joy looked to see Ryan and William holding out drinks towards Greta and her. Joy side-glanced towards Greta, who smiled as she took the drink from Ryan. Joy smiled weakly herself and took the drink from William, promising to herself that she wouldn't drink it. "Are you two ready to party?"

"As ready as we can be," Greta said. Ryan smiled down at her and William chuckled a little, putting a friendly arm around Joy's shoulders.

"Let's go dance. Maybe you'll start warming up," William said in Joy's ear through her hair. Joy bit her lip and looked up at him. He had a kind look in his eyes, a small smile on his thin lips that made Joy decide that it was just a harmless dance.

She smiled and took his free hand in hers, leading him towards the dance floor.

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Joy stumbled off the dance floor, giggling after hours of drinking and dancing with several guys - some that weren't even on the tour. Falling into the booth next to Greta, she smiled towards William who she had just spent another song dancing with. He was almost as drunk as her, but was able to hide it.

"Whoa there, girly," Greta said, looking towards her best friend. Joy looked at her and giggled a little more. Unlike Joy, Greta had spent the whole night sitting and sipping on the same drink, talking to Ryan on friendly terms.

"I'm having fun," Joy smiled to Greta. She hiccuped and found herself giggling a little more. William laughed at her a little to himself, finding her adorable drunk. She acted as if she were a seven year old, care-free and small. "But I think I'm going to go to the little girl's room."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Greta asked, wondering if her friend could make it without her. Joy just shook her head as she pushed herself up and walked towards the little girl's room, tripping over other people's feet and tables.

She went into the bathroom to be greeted by the sight of three pretty girls, fixing their hair and make up. Joy smiled at them as she looked at herself in the mirror.

Her stomach dropped.

Her hair was slightly askew, her make up smeared, her dress falling off her shoulder. Her eyes look glazed over, her cheeks pale.

Joy swallowed the lump in her throat and fixed her hair, wiped off some make up, and fixing her dress before walking out of the bathroom, ignoring the girls who were staring at her. She couldn't remember where her table was though, so as she stumbled through the crowded room, she looked around for people she knew.

In the corner of the club, she saw Brendon, and would have smiled - if his lips weren't locked onto a blonde with a short red dress and matching heels. His hands on her waist, her hands in his hair, Joy felt sick to her stomach. The alcohol, she thought to herself, was finally catching up to her.

Quickly, she shoved past people towards the exit of the club and walked briskly to the corner, where only a few people stood. She kicked off her shoes, fell onto her knees, and let her stomach contents splash over the sidewalk. When she looked up, the people who were once standing there, weren't there anymore.

Tears fell down her cheeks, as Joy brought her knees up to her chin, and wished she was home. She wanted, in that moment, to be home with her mom and Mark. To be going shopping for her dorm, and feeling as if she belonged. The tears ran faster, silently.

"Joy," An all too familiar voice said. The body, warm, brought Joy to their chest as she cried, and hugged them tight. "Joy, what happened?"

But Joy didn't say anything. And Chris didn't ask again. Instead, he just held his sister tight, petting her hair and rubbing her back, feeling guilty himself that he let this happen. After that, Joy didn't remember a thing.

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The elderly Joy, laying in her bed, remembered the youthful Joy waking up in her bunk, with a tear-stained face but wearing pajamas. She also remembered scolding herself as she got out of the bunk, a huge headache overtaking her, and went to wash her face.

The horrible feeling she felt almost fifty years ago overwhelmed Joy yet again as she bit her lip and wondered what Brendon felt during the kiss he shared with the blonde. Of course, that was the last time Joy ever saw the girl. But of course there were others. So many others.

Joy shut her eyes and felt a sudden sleepiness take over her tired body.