Goodbye Blues

Matthew's letter made it hard for Joy to sleep that night. She stayed awake, the soft moonlight shining down upon her face, thinking about her brother, Greta, Matthew, Julian and Karma, but most of all, Kevin.

She met him in college; he was in her journalism class. He was very tall, around 6'4, lanky and pale, with dark hair that hung in his green eyes. For him, as he always said, it was love at first sight. For her, it was a different story. She was caught up with Brendon drama even after the tour, and rejected him over and over again, for weeks, before finally agreeing to one date.

It ended up being more than one date, although all the way to her wedding day, Joy thought of Brendon has her main love throughout the relationship. The night of the wedding, everything changed. She decided then that she would stay true to Kevin, no matter what, through the marriage; Brendon was, after that night, officially nothing to her.

Though he fought his way through a couple times during the marriage, Brendon never stayed for long, feeling overwhelmingly unwelcome by Joy, who stayed true to her promise. She never noticed she was completely lying to herself until Kevin died.

Now, as she laid silently in bed, she didn't know why it had to all change after Kevin passed away. Why did her mind relapse to the thoughts of Brendon? Guilt ran over her as tears fell down her cheeks. Her mind hung onto one phrase, I'm so sorry, Kevin.

___________________

The line up started with The Hush Sound, moved onto This Providence, The Academy Is... and ended with Panic at the Disco then Fall Out Boy. After Brendon exited the tour bus for his sound check, Joy got ready for the show, trying to focus on the excitement surging through her, rather than her all too friendly relationship with Brendon. Her best friends and brother were about to play their first official show.

She rushed off the tour bus in a white dress with red floral print on it and red flats. Her hair was up halfway, and her lips were painted red with lipstick. As she walked towards the building of the venue, she looked at all the fans lined up. Some stared at her as she walked backstage, most shooting her dirty looks.

She shook off the looks and walked into the dressing room all the bands shared. Greta, who was ready, ran up to her in her sunflower sun-dress and smiled wide, grabbing Joy's hands. "I can't believe this is happening."

"Me neither," Joy smiled back, tangling her fingers in between Greta's happily. Together, the two best friends squealed out in excitement, pulling into each other for a big hug.

"Hush Sound on in ten minutes," The Hush Sound's tour manager said from the door before disappearing. Greta looked towards Bob, Darren, and Chris who were smiling just as wide as her. This Providence and The Academy Is... were standing about, watching the action unfold.

"Well, good luck, guys. The very first show is always the best," William said kindly, a genuine smile spread across his thin lips. Greta nodded, along with her band-mates, as all the other musicians agreed with William. They all broke out into stories, sharing their first-show experiences with one another affectionately.

Just as Sisky was finishing his comedic story about tripping on a wire his first show, Panic at the Disco and Fall Out Boy walked in after their late sound checks. They all came in smiling, some laughing, having conversation and glowing with excitement, though, both bands had done this before for much bigger crowds.

Joy's hand twisted her necklace about as she stared at Brendon, the way she usually did. He wore a navy blue flannel, sleeves tucked up to his elbows, with his black skinny jeans and blue vans. His white skin clashed with the dark colors, shining bright under the lights.

Greta bumped Joy with her hip, throwing Joy out of her trance and making her stumble awkwardly over her feet. "Oops, sorry."

"Oh, I'm sure you are," Joy muttered to Greta, who smiled wide, though she could hear the leaking sarcasm in Joy's voice.

As if by magic, out of no where, Dan appeared by Greta's side. "Sorry, but can I steal Greta away for a moment?" He asked kindly. Joy nodded. As Dan pulled her away, Joy could hear him giving her pointers. Patrick, William, and Brendon followed quickly after making jokes and also giving out advice.

Joy ripped her gaze away from the singers to be welcomed by the sight of three other groups; bassists, guitarists, and drummers. Sisky, Pete, Jon and David crowded about Chris, doing the same as the singers were doing to Greta. She looked towards the guitarists to see Michael, Mike, Joe, Gavin and Ryan standing about Bob, and onto the drummers where Darren stood with Andy, Butcher, Spencer, and Andy Horst.

Joy, having no where to go, walked over to the drummers. They all stopped talking and looked at her with welcoming smiles. After an awkward pause, Joy shared, "Did you know if all of you went by your actual names, there would be three Andrews in this group?"

Andy, Andy and Butcher all looked at each other and laughed. In unison, they yelled, "Andrew!" and shared a giant group hug adoringly. Darren and Spencer looked at each other before hugging the outside of the group hug. Joy giggled as Spencer pulled her into the ginormous embrace.

"Hey, Joy, last time I checked, you liked vocalists!" David called from the bassist group, as the group hug pulled away. Joy stood there with wide eyes, staring at the little-looking boy, shocked. A couple guys laughed, some looked confused. Greta stood next to Brendon with her jaw dropped. She looked up at the beautiful boy who was rubbing his neck, as awkwardly as possible.

Greta looked at Joy who was glancing about the room, her cheeks red as ever. Being the life-saver she was, she said loudly, "It's true, Joy has always had a huge crush on Beckett."

This earned more laughs and some guys slapping William on the back, who was turning pink himself. He laughed and glanced at Joy who was smiling at Greta. She mouthed a thank you, and looked to Brendon who was chuckling along with everyone else.

"Hush Sound, get on stage!" Their tour manager called. The Hush Sound rushed out, all hugging Joy and thanking the other people in bands. Almost immediately after, Joy walked out, followed by This Providence. They stood behind the door that led to the stage together, listening to The Hush Sound welcome themselves.

"Hey, we're the The Hush Sound, and we're new to the Decaydance/FueledbyRamen family. This is our first ever official show and we're so happy we get to share it with you. Hit it, Darren!" Greta said, her voice high and excited as she talked to the crowd. Joy stared at the door, as if it were her best friend, proudly.

They played their first song perfectly and the crowd went wild. Joy even could hear the fans singing along, which shocked her. Dan, who was leaning against the door, humming a bit, shared, "They're awesome."

"They're better than awesome," Joy said enthusiastically. "They're, they're..."

"Spectacular?" His deep voice came from behind. Joy turned to look at him, already captivated by just one word. She stared into his chocolate brown eyes as he made his way down the hallway and next to Joy.

Whispering, almost shyly now, Joy said, "Yeah, exactly. Spectacular."

As The Hush Sound went onto their third song, Dan started singing, warming up his voice. Joy attempted to keep listening to the all too familiar songs, but Dan's warm, Australian accent complimented his voice so well as he sang, she couldn't help but listen to him all the way until The Hush Sound ended their set with a thank you and goodbye.

They walked off stage, sweating and smiling wider than ever before, high fiving the guys and embracing Joy tightly, who, although they all stunk and looked terrible, hugged back tightly as well. "You guys were great, just spectacular."

"Thanks," Greta said, pulling her hair into a ponytail in attempt to cool down.

"Well, I was the one to use spectacular to describe your performance first, but whatever," Brendon said cockily beside Joy. Greta laughed a bit and thanked him as Joy rolled her eyes with a smirk on her face.

"Greta!" Ryan called, as he walked towards her from the middle of the hallway. Greta, recognizing the voice, smiled wide and turned around. She skipped up to him and began a conversation with him about what seemed to be what everyone was talking about, their performance.

"She has a big crush on him, doesn't she?" Brendon asked, leaning against the wall behind him and glancing at Joy. Joy looked towards him and shrugged.

"I can't tell, it's a secret," She said, smiling a bit.

"I can keep a secret."

"That's not what I heard."

Brendon stood upright now, smiling a bit, and muttered, "Damn Ryan." Joy laughed a bit and looked over at Ryan and Greta. She let her smile stay on her full lips as she watched Greta twist her dirty blond curls around her fingers flirtatiously. "She obviously does, though."

Joy glanced at Brendon who was staring at Greta, then looked back towards her best friend. "Well, how would you know?"

"Oh come on. Look at her. She's twisting her hair and giggling almost every five seconds," Brendon said. Joy shrugged a bit, noting that his points weren't such big deals. "Ryan isn't that funny, trust me."

Joy laughed at his unkind words. He smiled at her, causing her to look at her feet and grab a piece of her dark hair, twirling it around her pointer finger. Brendon leaned down and whispered in her ear,

"Yeah, just like that."

______________________

The calming words of Brendon's echoed through Joy's ears as her eyes began closing slowly. She looked at the clock that read '12:34,' and quickly after, she fell asleep, a small smile on her guilty lips.