Sequel: Déjà vu ›
My Unintended
Every heart you break [part 2]
I looked at the clock on the wall above the sofa.
It was 4.30am.
Who would be calling at this hour?
“Hello?” I asked tiredly into the phone.
“Gerard Way?”
“Yes, who’s speaking?” I asked, rubbing my eyes in a desperate attempt to wake up.
“Jennifer Howard. I’m Melissa Hart’s midwife, we spoke yesterday.” She said.
She was the one who had helped me to sign the form to allow the baby to be signed over to me. She had also been the one who insisted that I go home and get some sleep before I collected Mel and the baby tomorrow (or today, as it was now the early hours of the morning.)
“Hi, what’s going on?”
“It’s Melissa, she’s left the hospital. She discharged herself earlier this morning. I just went to check on her and the room was empty.” She said, sadly. I sat up straight, I was definitely awake as she finished this sentence. My heart was pounding.
“What about the baby?!”
“She was left behind.” Jennifer said. Relief flooded my body. “We need you to come in, fill out her birth certificate and take her home. The courts will hear about this and it will go on record with the custody form.” She said.
“Alright, I’ll be there in about half an hour.” I told her, putting the phone down.
I looked over at Frank, who had been sleeping in the chair on the other side of the room and was now awake, looking curiously at me as I got up and pulled my t-shirt and hoodie back on.
“Mel’s deserted the baby. I’ve got to go and pick her up from the hospital now.” I said grabbing my keys as Frank followed me out to my car. I was so thankful Melissa had dropped all of the baby’s stuff here already. She had no room to store any of it on her parents’ house, so it had to come here.
“Just sign here please.” Jennifer said, pointing at the bottom of the birth certificate beside Melissa’s name.
How convenient, she had signed it and left the whole thing blank and on her bed before escaping into the night. I signed my name under the now completed certificate and dropped the pen onto the table.
“Okay, Mr Way, you keep that and wait in the waiting room. I’ll just go and fetch your daughter.” Jennifer said, leading me back to the waiting room where Frank was sitting and she stalked away. I fell heavily into the chair beside him with the certificate in my hand.
“Can I see?” He asked, I nodded and gave it to him, my eyes focused on one spot on the immaculately clean floor.
“Having trouble finding a name then?” He asked. I nodded, again, and looked up at the waiting room door.
“I wanted it to start with M, you know in honour of her mommy. It’s just so hard, though, nothing comes to mind.” I said, sighing. I was actually torn between 2 names and put the ideas to Frank. We sat there thoughtfully for another 5 minutes until a voice called my name.
“Mr Way?”
I looked up at the door and saw Jennifer holding my daughter. I jumped up and took her gratefully. It felt so right to feel the warmth of her body against my chest, happiness coursed through my veins. I thanked Jennifer for everything she had done for me and turned to Frank, looking down at my daughter’s sleeping form.
He gasped.
“She’s gorgeous.”
“I’ve decided on her name.” I said. I had decided as soon as I had looked down at her.
“Michaela Way.”
It was so surreal to get her back home and dress her in one of the baby-grows I had for her and then lay her down in the crib I had placed beside my bed waiting for the day the baby arrived. I smiled down at her sleeping form, my heart melting as she gurgled to herself. I wandered downstairs in a daze and flopped onto the sofa beside Frank in silence.
“Coffee?” Frank offered. I nodded and my thoughts turned to Melissa as he stood up.
What had been going through her mind to make her desert her own child in the middle of the night? How desperate was she for a fix? I felt tears run down my face and cried silently until Frank returned with my coffee.
He sat down and put his arm around my shoulder. I started sobbing as my mind wandered through its own thoughts and Frank pulled me into a hug.
I sat there for ages just crying.
I think everything had finally taken its toll on me:
The fact that I had a daughter, Michaela, and that she had been rejected by her own mother.
I felt rejected.
Melissa had told me how she felt we were holding her back and had dumped Michaela on me so she could carry on being a junkie.
I felt like I had failed.
As I sat there crying into Frank’s shoulder, my heart broke again.
It was 4.30am.
Who would be calling at this hour?
“Hello?” I asked tiredly into the phone.
“Gerard Way?”
“Yes, who’s speaking?” I asked, rubbing my eyes in a desperate attempt to wake up.
“Jennifer Howard. I’m Melissa Hart’s midwife, we spoke yesterday.” She said.
She was the one who had helped me to sign the form to allow the baby to be signed over to me. She had also been the one who insisted that I go home and get some sleep before I collected Mel and the baby tomorrow (or today, as it was now the early hours of the morning.)
“Hi, what’s going on?”
“It’s Melissa, she’s left the hospital. She discharged herself earlier this morning. I just went to check on her and the room was empty.” She said, sadly. I sat up straight, I was definitely awake as she finished this sentence. My heart was pounding.
“What about the baby?!”
“She was left behind.” Jennifer said. Relief flooded my body. “We need you to come in, fill out her birth certificate and take her home. The courts will hear about this and it will go on record with the custody form.” She said.
“Alright, I’ll be there in about half an hour.” I told her, putting the phone down.
I looked over at Frank, who had been sleeping in the chair on the other side of the room and was now awake, looking curiously at me as I got up and pulled my t-shirt and hoodie back on.
“Mel’s deserted the baby. I’ve got to go and pick her up from the hospital now.” I said grabbing my keys as Frank followed me out to my car. I was so thankful Melissa had dropped all of the baby’s stuff here already. She had no room to store any of it on her parents’ house, so it had to come here.
“Just sign here please.” Jennifer said, pointing at the bottom of the birth certificate beside Melissa’s name.
How convenient, she had signed it and left the whole thing blank and on her bed before escaping into the night. I signed my name under the now completed certificate and dropped the pen onto the table.
“Okay, Mr Way, you keep that and wait in the waiting room. I’ll just go and fetch your daughter.” Jennifer said, leading me back to the waiting room where Frank was sitting and she stalked away. I fell heavily into the chair beside him with the certificate in my hand.
“Can I see?” He asked, I nodded and gave it to him, my eyes focused on one spot on the immaculately clean floor.
“Having trouble finding a name then?” He asked. I nodded, again, and looked up at the waiting room door.
“I wanted it to start with M, you know in honour of her mommy. It’s just so hard, though, nothing comes to mind.” I said, sighing. I was actually torn between 2 names and put the ideas to Frank. We sat there thoughtfully for another 5 minutes until a voice called my name.
“Mr Way?”
I looked up at the door and saw Jennifer holding my daughter. I jumped up and took her gratefully. It felt so right to feel the warmth of her body against my chest, happiness coursed through my veins. I thanked Jennifer for everything she had done for me and turned to Frank, looking down at my daughter’s sleeping form.
He gasped.
“She’s gorgeous.”
“I’ve decided on her name.” I said. I had decided as soon as I had looked down at her.
“Michaela Way.”
It was so surreal to get her back home and dress her in one of the baby-grows I had for her and then lay her down in the crib I had placed beside my bed waiting for the day the baby arrived. I smiled down at her sleeping form, my heart melting as she gurgled to herself. I wandered downstairs in a daze and flopped onto the sofa beside Frank in silence.
“Coffee?” Frank offered. I nodded and my thoughts turned to Melissa as he stood up.
What had been going through her mind to make her desert her own child in the middle of the night? How desperate was she for a fix? I felt tears run down my face and cried silently until Frank returned with my coffee.
He sat down and put his arm around my shoulder. I started sobbing as my mind wandered through its own thoughts and Frank pulled me into a hug.
I sat there for ages just crying.
I think everything had finally taken its toll on me:
The fact that I had a daughter, Michaela, and that she had been rejected by her own mother.
I felt rejected.
Melissa had told me how she felt we were holding her back and had dumped Michaela on me so she could carry on being a junkie.
I felt like I had failed.
As I sat there crying into Frank’s shoulder, my heart broke again.