In The Van With Angels

The gig was terrible.
Rivers played badly, obviously struggling through the hangover brought on by a three day drinking binge.
Sapphire, to her credit, was perhaps the best in the group. Despite many of Rivers' mistakes, she kept playing – ignoring the fact that Scarlet kept going off beat. She improvised around it, as did Jade.
They played through their set, ending a couple of songs early. Down hearted, they climbed off the stage, Scarlet walking swiftly towards where Nick was standing. Straight away, they hugged, Scarlet holding onto Nick as if it was the end of the world.
Sapphire made her way straight to the bar, Jade standing next to her. Immediately, the pair downed a vodka and coke, before ordering another drink. Sapphire felt an arm around her waist, and as soon as she saw it was Corey, she leaned into him. He kissed the top of her head, as Jade downed her drink again and ordered another one.
Rivers looked around, and straight away noticed the absence of Melody. He bit his lip, making his way to the bar. He stood next to Jade, who already had three empty glasses in front of her, and one full one in her hand. Sapphire had disappeared with Corey, and Rivers glanced at Jade.
"Shots?" He asked, and Jade nodded.
They ordered a few shots, and began racing each other to finish them first.
All of them went straight to their heads.
Rivers drifted off, soon finding a cute, blonde girl, who raved on about how great their band were. Immediately, he clocked her as thick, someone who knew nothing about music who was perhaps just trying to get Rivers to like her. He didn't care. He took her to some seats, and soon the pair were kissing their, ignoring the music around them.
Jade was, to put it bluntly, smashed. She drifted from the bar to the toilet, and leant over the sink, unable to get out of her head how badly the gig had gone.
They were better than that, she knew it. It was just…the last couple of gigs had gone so badly, maybe it was time for them to give it up?
She knew Rivers wanted to try skating more – Jimmy, Scarlet's brother, was always saying he could get him in touch with someone, get him sponsored. Scarlet had mentioned a few times going back to University, finishing her English decree. Sapphire, well Sapphire had been talking recently about moving away – she was fed up of the city, of her hometown, of everything around them.
Jade didn't know what she would do if the band split. University had proved she wasn't much good anything except for Art and playing the guitar. What could she do with art, anyway? She'd published a comic before, but it had proved pointless; it didn’t kick off, and she didn’t get much money through it.
She took a deep breath, before one of the stalls opened and a girl with long red hair and sharp green eyes stepped out. She smiled at Jade, but didn't say anything. Jade felt her heart lurch as she remembered their last gig, when she'd gone into the toilets and found her.
The girl looked up, as she washed her hands. She looked in the mirror, looking at Jade with narrowed eyes and a curious expression.
"Do i…do I know you from somewhere?"
Jade tried to smile, shaking her head at the same time. "Nope, don't think so…oh, my band just played, so maybe…"
"No, I don't mean seen I mean…" She turned around, looking at Jade. Her eyes narrowed even more, almost slits. After a few seconds, they widened, and she laughed. "Oh my god." She laughed even more. "Shit, you're the girl from before…oh Jesus!" She grinned. "Well, I was way too fucked for introductions last time. I'm Nikki." She held her hand out to Jade, who looked at it for a few seconds before shaking it.
"Jade." She smiled as she let go of her hand and slid her own hand into her pocket. "Look, I know this might sound stupid but I'd rather you didn't tell my friends about last time…"
"Jade, I wouldn't anyway…but why?" She looked at her for a few seconds, before she laughed. "Oh my god, you haven't told them, have you?"
"Told them…what?"
"About you being gay!"
"I…" She was stunned, slightly. How could she talk about it so blatantly, so openly? "I…"
"Listen to me, Jade…" She stepped forward slightly. "I know it seems hard to believe, but if they're really your friends they won’t care. And if they do…then they're not worth it." She sighed, leaning against the sinks. "It'll be a weight off your shoulders if you tell them."
"I…"
"Look, I got to go." She took a piece of paper out of her purse, with a pen. She scribbled a number down and handed it to Jade. "Look, that's my mobile number…phone me if you need to talk, alright?" She smiled, and kissed Jade's cheek before dancing out of the room.

Jade did not feel like going to Lucy's party that night. The others didn't either. All of them were hung over, tired from the night before.
Instead, they rented a film and spent the night watching it. There was a sort of coldness between Rivers and Scarlet, and Jade couldn't help but wonder why none of the others were with their boyfriends (girlfriend, in the case of Rivers). In the silence that the film allowed, Jade found herself thinking of Nikki, and what she had said.
She wondered if she should, perhaps, tell her friends.
No, something spoke inside her. You know what happened before…when you let someone know…
She bit her lip, glancing at the others.
All of them looked deep in thought. For a moment, she wondered what they were talking about.
If they were honest with each other, after the film had finished, if any of them had asked what had happened, none of them would have been able to reply.

The sobbing echoed through the flat the next day.
Rivers sat up, he'd been sleeping on the floor. Jade let out a snore on the bed next to him, before she too opened her eyes. She glanced at her phone, and let out a groan before showing it to Rivers.
What's up with Scarlet? She phoned me this morning, crying her eyes out…I'm coming over about eleven. See you then, Gwen xxx
Guilt ripped through the both of them. They'd been in Scarlet's flat, but it had been Gwen she'd contacted…
"We should have known something was wrong." Rivers muttered, standing up and looking at the door to Scarlet's bedroom. "We're here…"
"We were asleep." Jade replied, climbing off the sofa. "I wonder if Sapphire knows something's wrong…"
The door to Scarlet's room opened, and Sapphire walked out, closing the door softly behind her. She sighed, and leaned against it, hands to her face.
"Sapphire?" Jade spoke slowly, and Sapphire looked up, surprised to see Jade and Rivers staring at her.
"You're awake." She muttered, before walking towards the small kitchenette and getting a glass of water.
"What's wrong with Scarlet?" Rivers asked, and Sapphire lifted her eyes to look at them both.
"I…" She sighed. "Listen, guys….don't say anything…she's really upset at the moment and…"
Before she could continue, Rivers had walked straight past her and into Scarlet's bedroom.
"Scarlet?"
She was curled up on her bed, knees up to her chest and her head buried between her knees. She was crying, and Rivers felt a surge of anger at whoever did this to her.
"What’s wrong?"
She glanced up at him, her eyes red from crying, and nodded at her phone, which lay on the small desk at one side of the room.
Rivers walked towards it, picked it up, and pressed a button. The backlight came on, allowing him to read the text that was still there.
It's over. N x
Rivers looked at Scarlet.
"I…I phoned him…" She muttered. "Asked him…he said he was busy….but I heard…I heard a girl…with him…he's been cheating on me Rivers."
Rivers walked towards her, dropping the phone on the table. I know. He felt like saying. I know, I've known for a while…But he didn't. Instead he put an arm around Scarlet, and let her cry on his shoulder.

Gwen had turned up not long after, and that evening, the four of them tried their best to cheer Scarlet up, using a mixture of her favourite songs and booze.
Rivers had invited Melody over, who had turned up and immediately gave Scarlet a big hug. "Men are dicks." She muttered in her ear. "Bastards, all of them."
After a few drinks, they stuck the play station on, and slid in one of the Singstar games. Sapphire picked up the microphone, as did Melody, and the two played against each other, singing "My Favourite Game."
At around one, Melody left, Rivers saying goodbye to her in the corridor. Scarlet disappeared to the bathroom, where she sat with her back against the bath.
It took the others – who were all pretty drunk – a while to notice Scarlet's prolonged absence. Rivers was sitting on the sofa, a beer clutched in his hands as he stared out the window. Sapphire was dancing to We Run This, Jade was passed out on the floor, and Clem was watching the television intently, trying to work out why the music did not match the image on screen.
It wasn't until Rivers looked around him that he noticed Scarlet wasn't there.
He stood up, carefully stepping over Jade and walking towards the bathroom. He tried to open the door, only to find it was locked. "Scarlet?" He knocked on the door. When he heard no reply, he panicked. "Scar let me in." Clem appeared at his side.
"What’s going on?" She asked, her voice slurred as she spoke.
"Scarlet's in there, but she won't let me in."
"Oh god." Panic filled Clem's eyes. "Rivers, what if she's done something?"
"I doubt it…"
"Scarlet!" She screamed, and started to slam her shoulder against the door. She screamed again, before Rivers grabbed her shoulders and pulled her back.
"Don't." He muttered. "You'll hurt yourself."
"But what if something's happened?"
He sighed, Clem was usually so clear headed and rational, but she'd had a lot to drink. "I'll do it."
He slammed his own shoulder against the door three times before it swung open to reveal an empty bathroom. He cast his eyes around looking for some clue as to where Scarlet could be. His eyes landed on the window, open. He swore under his breath and ran to it, looking out.
He saw no sign of Scarlet, but did notice that the drainpipe was in easy reach, and with a short swing you could easily get to the fire escape, which then led up and, with a short climb, you could reach the roof.
He looked at Clem, who was gazing at him, confused.
"You stay here." He said, as he turned and walked out of the bathroom. "In case she comes back."
"Where are you going?" She asked him, as he strode past her and towards the door.
"To find her."

There was something relaxing, calming in being alone on the rooftop, looking out over the City with it's few lights on, and the occasional yell of a drunk near by.
Sure, it wasn't London, or New York, or Paris…it wasn't a big city, but it was her home.
If she turned around, she could the flats that were still bordering her hometown, the empty flats where they used to be able to break in and look around at the abandoned homes, toys, and posters still scattered around, until they guarded it.
Suddenly, she wanted to be back in that town, to climb up the hill to the Head, and look out at the beach.
But she was here, she was looking out at the city, a comforting site but not as comforting as the town, where nothing had changed since she had left. The city was forever changing, whilst the town stayed still, offering stability.
She decided then that she would go to her parent's house tomorrow, stay there for the weekend, and then return here.
"I wondered where you had got to."
She heard Rivers behind her, and saw him as he sat next to her, looking out at the city.
"I needed…" She sighed. "I don't know. I don't know what I need anymore Rivers."
"You may not know what you need," He wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "But you know what you got, right? You got your friends, and we're all here for you Scar."

Scarlet was gone before Sapphire got home the following day. She'd spent the day with Corey, and when she got home, she found the flat empty. No one was here. She went to Scarlet's room, where a few of her clothes had gone, others scattered around. Panicked, Sapphire did the first thing she thought of. She phoned Rivers, Jade, and Clem.

She sat on the hillside, leaning forward against the wind and gazing out over the dark sea. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, taking herself back to when they were teenagers, when she and Clem would come up here, having a cigarette away from the prying eyes of their parents.
She was absorbed in her own thoughts, and didn't notice Clem approach her, sitting on the bench beside her.
Scarlet looked at Clem, as her friend offered her a cigarette. Smiling, Scarlet took it, lighting it swiftly.
"You found me then."
"Yeah. Sapphire was worried about you. Rivers drove to the skate park. Your brother said you'd been there earlier, said you were going to your parents. I guessed you'd be here."
"Clem, do you ever feel like…I don't know…like you've wasted your time with something?"
"Scar, I've just finished a Uni course in fashion. Of course I sometimes doubt whether it was the right choice…."
"I just feel like I've wasted the last year on this fucking relationship," Scarlet stood up now, agitated. "Like…" She whirled around, and Clem spotted tears in her friend's eyes. "I saw Dante, a couple of months ago,"
"The dude you dated in sixth form?"
"Right. Basically, he asked me out. I was in love with him when we were going out," She sat back down on the bench, her head in her hands. "And I turned him down because of Nick…what if I'd got back with him? I mean, it's stupid to think but…he would never have cheated on me. And now he's fucking engaged."
Clem looked at her surprised.
"I saw him…today…when I got off the train." She sighed, running a hand through her hair. "And the band's not going anywhere, is it? God, I wish I hadn't fucked up at University…"
She looked at Clem, who was waiting patiently for her to finish. Scarlet felt so thankful to her, ever since they were teenagers Clem would always sit and listen to her, always put up with her rants.
"What ever happened to my dreams Clem?"
"Which ones?" Clem grinned, and Scarlet, through her tears, laughed.
"All of them…when I was a kid, I was going to do it all, see it all, remember?"
"Of course I do." Clem grinned. "Almost every week you had a new goal."
"But…but I was always going to go to Uni and be a journalist! I wanted to be an editor! That's never going to happen now."
"Scarlet," Clem's voice was sharp, and Scarlet looked at her, knowing Clem was going to now tell her what she needed to hear, now what she wanted to hear. "You guys are good, I've heard you practise. You used to be awesome, whenever you played. But a few bad gigs and you guys lose confidence. The band will go somewhere, trust me. And as for Uni…you can always go back you know."
"I'll just fuck it up again."
"Fine, then focus on the band."
Scarlet nodded. "Yeah…alright." She shrugged, leaning forward. "Thanks Clem."