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Even though we had just come back from a one-month tour of Europe, it was a month later when Alex left to tour up and down the east coast. That month he spent with Charlotte and I was the best month I’ve ever had in a while. Alex managed to work things out with London, who met a lovely woman at The Ugly Muffin. They’re now dating and he brings me muffins from her. I knew I loved that place. Alex even managed to repair the relationship between him and Christopher. That made me the most happiest. Of course, odd things happened and I found myself sitting in the bathroom, waiting.

Charlotte was beginning to understand the concept of family; the role of the grandparents, the mother, the father, and the child. She went through a phase of calling Jack her dad, since he was the male that spent the most time with her. Sure, she spent plenty of time with London, but even she knew that an uncle couldn’t be a father at the same time. Of course, Jack, the good old character, instead of explaining things to her, told her that she should call Alex dad instead of him. Alex had a heart attack and I fought with Jack about it. After being upset at Jack for a few hours, Alex told me to apologize and thusly assumed the role of father. It still bothered me.

Also, I started getting sick. Alex stayed over and helped me for about a week straight until he asked me a funny little question one day. I had woken up with a start and made a mad dash to the bathroom, throwing myself to the toilet and barfing up the contents of my stomach.

“Are you pregnant?” His voice wasn’t judgmental and it wasn’t aggressive. It was calm and inquiring. He knelt down beside me and pulled my hair from my face, rubbing circles on my back.

I looked up at him and he wiped my mouth for me. “Alex, I don’t know.”

And those words led me to the predicament I was in now. I was waiting to urinate on a stick. It was fifteen minutes before I finally did the deed and capped the stick, setting it in a plastic bag to incubate – or whatever it needed to do – on the counter. I washed my hands and opened the door, handing the plastic bag to Alex. While we waited, I went down to wake Charlotte up.

She was a little bit of a brat this morning when I tried to get her up, but she went and brushed her teeth and washed her face anyway. I put her curly brown hair into two pigtails and suited her up in a short-sleeved white button up blouse and pink cotton overalls. She fought with me over putting on her little white Velcro Keds with little flowers on the strap. I gave her a quick, firm slap to her butt and she settled down and stopped fighting me. Taking her downstairs, I set her in front of the television and put in an old Bananas in Pajamas VHS I had. Minutes later, I had a bowl of Fruit Loops in front of her and she was at peace. I got back upstairs to see Alex pulling out his phone.

“Who are you calling?” I asked him, leaning against the doorframe.

He tossed the pregnancy test to me and I almost dropped it. A happy pink plus sign stared back at me. “Ready to be a mother of two?”

“Well, I guess I should call him,” I sighed softly, running my hands over my face. “Alex, I’m so sorry. So, so sorry.”

“I’m not the one having his spawn,” he said simply. He opened his arms wide and I threw myself into them. He fell back onto my bed and just held me. We knew it wasn’t Alex’s child. We had made a promise that we wouldn’t sleep with each other until we were ready and since Jack’s the only guy I’ve slept with last, the puzzle piece fit. Suddenly, he started laughing. I sat up and slapped his chest.

“Stop laughing. This isn’t funny, it’s serious! Why are you laughing?” I asked, frowning at him.

“Jack’s going to be a dad. With <i>my</i> girl.” Groaning, I fell backward, lying next to him. Of course, this would happen.

All kids should know that no matter what, if you have sex unprotected, you will get pregnant. This totally busted the doing it while standing won’t make you pregnant myth.

Five hours later Jack was over at my house. Alex and I were giving Charlotte swimming lessons at the time. I had on my leopard one piece, Alex had on blue swim trunks, and Charlotte had a pink one piece on. Jack came over in neon orange swim trunks.

“Hey, Charly!” Jack yelled, starting to run over to her grinning like a goof, but I quickly grabbed his arm. Alex picked Charlotte up and took her outside to swim in the pool for her lesson.

“Jack we need to talk,” I said quietly, taking his hand and leading him upstairs to my bedroom. When I shut the door behind us, I looked up to see his puzzled face. I went over and plopped my butt on the bed. “You should probably sit.”

He laughed nervously and sat beside me; I knew he was nervous because his laughter was at a higher pitch than normal. “Now, Aimee, I know you’ve been in love with me for years now, but I don’t think this is the-”

“-I’m pregnant,” I blurted out. He sat there with his jaw slacked and body frozen. “When we did it on the plane, I had stopped birth control. I didn’t even think about it. Jack, I’m so sorry, it’s my fault.”

“No. No, it’s… not just your fault,” he whispered, his voice giving out on him. Slowly, he slipped off the bed to his knees. Reaching over he placed his hands on my stomach. We were quiet for a long time before he finally spoke again, his voice still quiet at a whisper. “We… I helped make a person and it’s inside you?”

“Well where else would it be?” I laughed, placing my hands on top of his.

“The stork?” He shook his head and looked me in the eyes, his desperate. “Are-are you going to keep it?”

My breath caught in my throat. I hadn’t even thought of getting rid of it. Shaking my head yes, I saw his eyes widen. “I’m going to keep the baby. You’re a good person and whoever it is inside, deserves a chance at being a good person as well.”

“You know, I’d kiss you if it weren’t for Alex,” he said quietly, smiling faintly at me. Smiling at him, I leaned down and kissed the corner of his mouth chastely.

After talking about what we were going to do, we went downstairs to Alex and Charlotte. We decided it was best not to let Charlotte know anything. It would only confuse her; I mean, why would mommy be having a baby with uncle, when only mommies and daddies had babies together?

Jack immediately dove into the pool and Charlotte, with her floaties on her arms, waddled after him and hopped into the pool after him. Looking over and making sure she wasn’t floating, I turned to Alex and hugged his wet and slick body in an instant. We watched as Jack swam with Charlotte trailing after him, laughing and splashing her way. Alex sat back in a lounge chair and I sat between his legs, lying back against him.

“So what’s going to happen?” he muttered into my ear. “You remember we’re leaving for a few months right?”

“I remember. I won’t start showing until well after you two come back. Don’t worry.” Turning, I wrapped my arms around his middle and cuddled against him. “Alex I’m nervous. Another baby, how am I going to explain this one? I feel so irresponsible.”

“Like you said, don’t worry. We’ll deal with this,” he whispered, kissing my cheek. Sighing, I closed my eyes as he kissed the top of my head repeatedly. “God I love you.”

That brought a smile to my face easily.

It was two months into All Time Low’s tour and Alex called four days a week to tell me stories about the day and what had happened the three days he didn’t call. Jack would always snatch the phone away mid-conversation and beg me to put the phone to my stomach so he could talk to the fetus for five minutes. It made me laugh. Soon, Jack began calling me the three days that Alex didn’t and Alex would be the one to interrupt his calls to me. We talked about baby names. I think if Charlotte could understand, she’d know what was going on immediately. Until then, I was positive she thought I was crazy for putting the phone to my stomach.

The doctor appointments were great and my mom really helped me out as she did when I was pregnant with Charlotte. He said that my birth with Charlotte was perfectly executed and that I wouldn’t have a problem with this second one.

Soon the boys returned and time went on. Jack spent more time around the house, which made Charlotte happy, but it was obvious that though Alex loved Jack, he wasn’t too happy on him being over all the time. Jack would take me to all of my doctor appointments and Alex would stay with mom and watch Charlotte. Eight months into the pregnancy, I was a blimp and a bubbling mess if anything went wrong. Alex explained that the stork decided Charlotte was responsible enough and decided to give our family a baby, that Charlotte would be a big sister now; that made her ecstatic, and all she wanted to do was rub and kiss my tummy, sometimes even singing to it, but most of the time she just sat hugging my stomach.

For my eight-month doctor appointment, the boys were in Virginia playing a quick gig so that left me to drive myself. Something felt strange – I’d had this feeling for a week already – as I drove myself to the hospital. I was having serious pains, but I passed it off as normal and told myself to just wait it out until I came for the check up. I laid back while the ultrasound technician ran the machine over my stomach.

“How is it?” I asked, smiling faintly. It hurt terribly. I’d been keeping the pain to myself – not even telling my mom – and it was killing me, like someone was digging a knife into my stomach from the inside.

She didn’t answer me for a long while as she stared at the machine’s screen. After a moment, she quickly got up. “I’ll be right back.” The smile she gave me didn’t reach her eyes, which worried me.

Soon she returned with a man in tow. “Hello, I’m Dr. Cavanaugh. Let’s see what we have here.” Picking up the machine, he ran it over my stomach again. The calm look on his face changed to that of worry. “Ms. Livesay, I am a obstetric sonographer; we look into complicated and high-risk pregnancies. I’m afraid to tell you, but we’ll have to deliver your baby now.”

My face paled and quickly I asked for a phone.

Hours later – the nurse in charge said it had been at least twelve when I yelled at her –I was pushing, crying, and screaming. My phone call reached the boys and they quickly left and drove all the way back to Baltimore. Jack was in the delivery room with me as well as my mother; she made Alex stay outside with Charlotte, but Zack and Rian were with them both as well as Jack’s parents.

“Push darling, just one more. The head’s out,” my mother coached, holding my hand tightly.

Jack was in pain as he tried to reassure me. Bawling I squeezed their hands tightly and gave one final push with everything I had. Suddenly that horrible feeling, the watermelon leaving the lemon feeling, disappeared. In my arms was a creature, a little girl. I stared at her face in awe; she was tinier than Charlotte was – a result of premature birth. It felt like it did the first time though, and I cried. Jack stood there, his eyes wide and mouth contorting. I passed her along to him and he took her. He seemed so vulnerable holding his daughter.

“Name?” the nurse approached, smiling.

Jack looked at me and I nodded as he handed the little girl back to me. “Carolina Skye Barakat.”

“Something’s wrong,” I whispered. My mother’s eyes widened and she quickly grabbed the obstetrician before he turned away. “Something’s wrong!” Carolina was suddenly still and the color in her face was changing.

Three hours later, I was taken to a private room at the hospital. I didn’t want anyone but Charlotte. A knock on the door sounded, but I didn’t respond. The door opened and I heard the tapping of little feet against the tile floor.

“Mommy! Mommy you crying,” she said, standing on her tip toes to see above the bed. “Mommy don’t cry.”

Biting my lip, I turned to see my mother pick up Charlotte and set her on the bed. Charlotte immediately cuddled with me and my mother went back to the door, shooing someone off.

“But Mrs. McIntyre, I-”

I never heard the rest of that sentence. Taking a deep breath, I wrapped my arms around Charlotte tightly, sobbing as my little girl comforted me. Charlotte fell asleep after a while and I followed soon after. It wasn’t fair; not one bit.

When I woke up, I saw a sight. Jack was asleep and gawkily curled up on the armchair. Sighing, I looked around my bed, but didn’t see Charlotte anywhere. Instead, she was replaced by Alex. I laid there silently, comforted slightly that they were there with me. I stared at the white wall blankly for a long while.

The clock read 1:00 PM when the doctor finally came in, waking Alex and Jack up. Dr. Carrols performed a thorough check up on me before asking the two boys to leave. Alex and Jack left, Alex quite a bit more worried to have to step out of the room. I stared at the doctor sadly and he sighed.

“Ms. McIntyre, now I understand that it would have been your second child, correct?”

“It was my second,” I whispered. “She was alive for two minutes and was given a name. It was my second.”

He nodded, silent. “I’m going to have to be frank with you Aimee. Physically, you’re going to be fine, but I should tell you that you shouldn’t attempt to have more children.”

Looking up, my eyes widened and I was speechless. “I… I shouldn’t or I can’t? What happens if I do?”

Smiling sadly, he stayed silent and I knew.

“We’ll get you discharged as quickly as possible,” he said, standing. He placed a hand on my shoulder for a moment before turning around and walking out the door. Alex quickly scrambled back in alone.

I looked up and gave him a small smile. “Hi, where did Jack go?”

“He had to go home. He’s taking it pretty hard and his parents were worried. His sister and brother are flying home to spend time with him,” Alex said, sitting on the edge of the bed. “What did the doctor say?”

“I shouldn’t have any more children,” I replied.

He frowned, furrowing his brows. “Shouldn’t?”

“I could die.”