Summer of 09'

Riley's POV.

I smiled as I threw my keys onto on the wooden table as I looked around the empty kitchen, it felt magnificent to be back home. A smile played on my lips as I spied a plate of cookies on the table, a note beneath it written in Gram's sloppy cursive. I picked up the page as I took a bite of the chocolate chip cookie, "Ran to the supermarket and to Grandpa's grave, be back soon. XOXO, Grandma."

"Your grandma went to your Grandpa's grave?"

I turned to see Caleb bringing in my luggage and I swallowed the moist cookie before answering, "Yeah. His birthday is coming up, along with what would be their Wedding Anniversary," I replied. I placed the note on the table before motioning for Caleb to follow, still carrying my luggage to my room.

I sat on the edge of my bed as he dropped my luggage and came to lounge besides me, his hand instantly traveling to hold my hand. I looked around the room, taking in the time to look at the photos of Ava and myself, the way we always smiled and did the dorkiest things, then to the picture of Spencer and Ava, how looked so genuinely happy together.

Did they ever fight?

My eyes trailed to Caleb's face, Could we make this love last?

I let myself fall backwards onto the bed, tugging Caleb back with me. He turned his body to lay on his side as our entwined hands laid on my stomach, our eyes looking into each others as I bit my lip feeling nervous about the sudden thoughts entering my head.

What would happen if he met someone better than me on tour? What if this was just teenage love? I could feel my heart sinking at the thought of living without Caleb, the feeling of being absolutely miserable once more. I wasn't sure if I could survive without Caleb by my side.

"What are you thinking about?"

The question threw me off guard and I let my eyes sink to our hands, my heart beat quickening. "I was thinking about how fantastically yummy those cookies were. You should take them back for the boys, I'm sure they've missed her cookies," I said quietly, lying through my teeth.

"Mmm, I will. Riley, we need to talk."

How would this play out? Those words always meant terrible things, what if he didn't want me anymore? What if he just wanted in my pants? Would Caleb use me like that?

I nodded, "What do we need to talk about Caleb?"

"I want you to come back to Texas with me," I could feel my heart skidding to a stop as he spoke those words. I lived North and he wanted me to go South, submerse myself in a new culture and be with his friends and with him.

Leave everything I have and love and go to Texas.

Or, stay here and let Caleb go back to Texas and have a difficult and possibly estranged long distance relationship. My hand squeezed his as I looked back up at him now, I knew what I wanted to say, but how could I say it?

Bluntly?

"Caleb, I can't."

"Why? You finished school Rye, you can live with me and then go on tour with the boys and I. We never have to be apart."

"But what happens if we don't last. I'll be stuck in Texas by myself without a penny to my name and nowhere to go. I know nobody in Texas, I have Grams to think about Caleb, this is a big decision on my part."

"Then think it over and then give me your answer," He responded as I sighed, I could tell he was upset by the tone of his voice. His hand untangling from mine as he rolled onto his back letting his hand push back his hair in a frustrated and annoyed gesture.

"It's just a big commitment, Caleb."

"If you loved me, you'd come with me."

I felt anger rise up in me, "Caleb, don't you even possibly say that to me. That's unfair to use against me. You know I love you," I argued as I pushed myself from the bed.

"I love you, Riley. I am ready to spend the rest of my life with you because I know I'll never find somebody who loves me like you do. I'll never find somebody who annoys the fuck out of me but is the cutest, sexiest woman alive and I couldn't be mad at her for long because everything she does is so perfect. No girls get me like you do, they don't see what you see. They just see Caleb Turman, Forever The Sickest Kids member and manwhore. You love me for the man who see right now. I am in love with you Riley Evie Landon. I want you now and forever, and even past forever."

I felt floored as I stared at Caleb who now pulled himself from my bed, "You're everything I've ever wanted in a girl, I don't want to lose you because of the band, because of Texas. If you want I'll give it all up for you."

"No." The word came from lips abruptly and he stopped as he stared at me, his jaw slightly slack. I walked forward, my hands coming to the side of his face, cupping his cheeks as I looked into his eyes. "Caleb, I love you with everything I am. This is a huge step, a huge commitment. I need time to think about this and if you quit the band, quit being with your friends and moved to Lehman where there is nothing, you'd regret it. Texas is as much of a part of you, as Lehman, Maine is a part of me."

Caleb nodded as his hands wrapped around my wrists, "Caleb, you are everything to me. I have no clue what I'd do without you. But as much as I love you and want to be with you, I know I need to be sensible about the decisions I make."

"I understand."

"Thank you," I said as I leaned forward to kiss his lips but he turned his head, my lips coming in contact with his cool cheek and confusion settled in.

"I think we should go on a break to re-evaluate our relationship. I feel like maybe I'm more invested then you are," He replied so nonchalantly as I felt a part of my worst fears coming true. My heart thudding in my chest.

"Alright, Caleb." I pulled away from him as I watched as he walked to the doorway of my room, "Caleb," I watched as he turned, "Don't forget the cookies for the boys or they'll kill you."

He gave a soft smile, I could tell it wasn't genuine, there was no spark in his eyes just confusion and hurt that I had caused. I moved to crawl back into my bed to lay there and think. I wasn't sure what I was suppose to do. How could he expect me to really pack up and leave, it wasn't that simple. It couldn't just be that simple. It never would be.

It seemed every time Caleb and I were having our perfect moments, something would go terribly wrong. It was like a roller coaster, one second we were high and thrilled by each other but somehow we started to go downhill and thrill was losing it's effect, its magnificent high and everything became a mess.

This was a decision I had to make, and I knew in the long run it would determine whether or not Caleb and I would stay together.