Summer of 09'

I pushed myself forward towards the table in the back corner, the chair screeching against the tiled floor as I fumbled into a sitting position. A waiter walked over and smiling, "Coffee," I mumbled as she nodded and walked away and I let arms fold across the table before letting my head sink to meet them.

This was a nightmare.

Soon enough I heard a familiar screeching sound and I let my head lift to watch as Christofer sat across from me, a black fedora covering his ginger hair, and sunglasses his eyes, but a smile touched his lips. I made myself straighten as he tucked his sunglasses into his plaid shirt, and he crossed his hands upon the black table top.

"So, you rang."

I could feel my mouth growing dry and the coffee was brought to the table, just in time it seemed. I poured some sugar into the cup letting my mind find the words I wanted to speak, but I continued drawing blanks even as I poured in the milk.

"Caleb asked me to move to Texas with him," I blurted out as I let the spoon from my hand clatter to the table, I could feel myself getting upset and angered at the same time.

"That's a big step and one that you need to be sure of before you make it," He commented simply watching my movements, I'm sure I was readable, and he could tell how frustrated and anxious I was about the situation.

"He said we were on break because I told him I needed to think about it. How could he say that to me? God, I fucking love him more than he'll ever know. But I can't bring myself to uproot myself and move to somewhere I'd be so uncomfortable, so out of fucking place. I can't do this to myself, my grandma or my friends here. I can't."

"It seems you don't need my advice, your mind sounds made up."

"You don't understand, I love him and knowing that I can't do this breaks my heart more than anything in the world. I feel like I need him to survive, he is the air I breathe."

"Riley, as your friend, I want to tell you something. We will love and lose many people in our lives. We will at one point mistaken someone we liked, had a huge crush on for love.We will say we will never love another, never find another. But as humans we crave that, we crave simply having somebody by our side, somebody to love and have wild sex with. If you lose Caleb, this could only be temporary but you could love again. We don't need people to survive, we want to think we do because of the strong emotional ties."

I listened and I understood what he meant, I knew that we would always love people whether it would be us falling in love with them or simply loving them as a friend. I knew Christofer wouldn't tell me what to pick, but I knew he'd say the same thing everyone always told me.

'Do whats best for you.'

I instantly felt like I knew the decision I needed to make, I smiled as I reached across the table to pat Christofer's hand, "Thank you, for everything, I gotta go."

I left a few bills onto the table as I turned to walk away digging into my pocket for my phone, and texting Caleb telling him to meet me at our slide, I knew for a fact he wasn't back in Texas, not yet anyway. He would stick around a bit for my decision and in my heart I knew I had to do this, I knew this was what's best for myself.