Sunsets to Sunrises

I stood to the side of the stage, John and the boys already halfway through their set. Ryan stood at my side, his hand slipped casually in my back pocket. My foot tapped to the beat of Pat’s drums as the rest of the band played Undressing The Words.

“What up?” John yelled, once they were done the song, the crowd erupting into a sea of cheers. “Word. Well, I’d like to introduce I friend to all of you. She is a very good friend of the bands, as well as my girlfriend’s best friend. Her name is Maddie and, damn, she can give me a run for my money when it comes to singing.”

My heart stopped and I turned my face to Ryan’s, fixated in a look of horror. I furrowed my eyebrows together in worry. Ryan, however, gave the top of my head a kiss before whispering, “you can do it. You’re amazing.” I couldn’t help but believe him.

Next thing I knew I was sipping on my vitamin water, and singing my heart out alongside John.

[KENNEDY’S POV]

Damn it, man, I said to myself, why are you messing up so much?

Maddie was out on the stage with me, on the opposite side, paying no attention to me. John was closest to me, shooting me a glance every so often when I missed or misplayed a chord. Normally I didn’t have to think about what I was playing; that was for Pat to worry about. The songs had always just flowed from my hands and into my guitar. But Maddie preforming with me made me so nervous.

“Nice show everyone!” Pat yelled once we were all off stage. John shot me another glance, letting me know I hadn’t been so nice, as Pat just put it. I started to walk off stage with the rest of the guys when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked over to see John looking down on me with a serious look on his face.

John simply motioned his head for me to follow. “Kennedy,” John started, “what the fuck were you doing up there?”

“I’m sorry man, I know, I know, I was messing up bad,” putting my head down apologetically.

“Dude, you know that there are scouts here right? We could get signed. Signed, man! You know what that means, right?” John put his hands on my shoulders and lowered his face to my level. “You want to do this with your life, right?”

“Ya,” I answered. Of course I did; there was nothing more I wanted to do than play music forever. To write, tour, sing, play. I wanted to do it all - all the time.

“Then don’t get a girl mess you up.”

John walked away, leaving me stunned. I had just assumed John thought I was nervous or something. The thought that the rest of the guys knew I was messing up because of Maddie never even crossed my mind.

“Fuck,” was all I said before leaving the stage wing and heading off to our bus for a long night of driving.

I got to the van and everyone was already sandwiched in; well, except Maddie who was still paying a tearful goodbye to Ryan.

“Call me when I get to the next venue?” I over heard her whisper.

“Uh, yea, sure” I heard him whisper back, looking a little anxious and distracted. He gave her a quick kiss on the top of her head and walked away without saying another word. Maddie’s eyes looked a little misty as she walked solemnly towards the van.

I put my head down as I sat down next to Garrett. “Pay no attention to them,” he told me, “Maddie’s still got it for you.”

I looked at him like he was out of his mind. Where was this coming from? Garrett, of all people, had always been against me being with Maddie again. I pushed his comment aside and focussed on the problem at hand - how I was going to play the rest of the shows without messing up.

I was in the middle of contemplating it all when a pissed off Maddie entered the van and took the last seat - right next to me. Great, I thought, just what I need. To spend a 10 hour drive next to an emotional basket case.

Soon everyone was dozed off except for myself, Maddie and Daisy who was driving. I heard Maddie yawn before she unbuckled her seatbelt and climbed into the back area of the van where you could lie down. I turned my head a little and saw her take off her T-shirt and replace it with one of John’s and tug off her jeans before pulling an old blanket over herself and close her eyes. She looked to beautiful and peaceful there, her eyes tearing a little and her legs curled up over her petit chest. I closed my eyes, as well, to get some sleep, letting thoughts of how I could be with that girl in the back haunt me.

Hours later I woke from a bump on the road. I looked up into the dark to see that Daisy was now dozing in the passenger seat and John had taken his place. I rolled my neck around a bit, trying to relieve a painful cramp that was starting.

“Kenny, go lie down before you’re cramp get worse - or else you’ll play crappier than usual tomorrow,” John told me.

I stuck my tongue out at him, John smiling in return, before hoping quietly over the seats of my parent’s Suburban and into the back. Maddie was curled up into a little ball, her arms wrapped around herself, the blanket that she’d initially used bundled at the bottom of her feet. I tried my best to unfold it in the bumpy van. Eventually we hit a hole in the road and my hands slammed down on the floor, waking Maddie.

“What the hell are you doing, Kenny?” Maddie somehow quietly shrieked.

“Sorry, sorry,” I stuttered. A year later and my tongue still tied itself in knots around her. “My neck was cramping and I woke up, from a bump you know because this is an older van, well not that old, and John told me to come back here so that the bumps from the van, well the road...”

“Whoa, whoa, Kenny,” Maddie put her hand up in the air for me to stop talking. I took in a nervous swallow before looking up at her. “You’re babbling,” she said, “just untangle my blanket and go to sleep.”

Maddie lay back down and rolled onto her stomach. Whilst I unbundled her blanket I could feel her eyes all over me, causing butterflies to erupt in my abdomen. I, finally, was done with her blanket. When I handed it to her she snatched it quickly out of my hands before wrapping herself tightly in it. “You stay over there,” pointing to the opposite side of the van which she was on, “and don’t come near me.” Maddie then closed her eyes and fell into a restless sleep.

I let out a sigh before lying down and finding another old blanket to use, all my preconceived notions about Maddie liking me flying out the window. I closed my eyes, as well, and fell into a light sleep, sans cramped neck. But my light sleep was once again interrupted, this time by Maddie. She was now in the middle of the van, her blanket tossed aside, accidentally, and tiny trickles of tears running down her soft rosy cheeks.

“Maddie, Maddie,” somehow not stuttering, “are you alright?” I reached out in hopes of comforting her, but she only pulled her shaky body away from me. “Maddie?”

“Kennedy,” she said, taking a big swallow, “just..just..I don’t know. I can’t think of any more mean things to say. I’m tired of being a bitch to you. I’m sorry.”

I looked at Maddie, utterly stunned.