Compliments
Toshiya.
Toshiya.
A name in itself that describes such an object of beauty. The name itself is enough to describe him. The other person, sitting across from you, listening to your words flow endlessly into each other without really understanding what the hell you’re saying finally gets what you mean when you simply say “Toshiya.”
They just say “Ah,” in response. There is nothing more to say.
It’s Sunday night, another performance has ended and everyone but Toshiya is exhausted. I watch him dancing around like he always does, that same old adorably goofy grin plastered on his face. Kaoru does his grumpy old man act and tells him off for not settling down. I laugh quietly to myself, following them back to the bus. But my laughter is shaky and nervous as I prepare myself to say what I’ve wanted to say to him for years. Three little words.
“Toshiya…”
He turns to me, still grinning, his make up smudged from sweat. I recoil slightly as he looks like he’s about to launch himself at me. Kaoru walks off, muttering something under his breath.
“Yeah, Daidai?” He asks, holding his middle finger up at Kaoru’s back. My stomach turns uncomfortably, making me feel nauseous. How was I going to say this? How the hell was I going to say this? I push my hair out of my eyes to stop it sticking to my forehead.
“I, er… I…” I blush violently, my face a livid red with embarrassment, my brain pulls a random thought from the air and puts it into my mouth, the words blurting out in a muddle of sounds. “Your butt looks real nice in those jeans!”
“What?” He stares at me, eyebrows raised in confusion.
“Nothing,” My eyes dart round the room, looking at everything but him.
Then, silence. A heart-stopping, intense silence in which he processes what I’ve just said and I turn a vivid scarlet colour, matching the colour of my hair, my skin burning fiercely. I curse myself internally, my mind swarming with annoyance at my cowardice and stupidity. I find myself begging the ground to swallow me whole or lightning to strike me.
“No, seriously, Die. I have no idea what you just said,” He smiles, amused. I can’t tell if he’s being serious or not. My eyes narrow at him, wondering if he just wants me to make a fool out of myself again. But I figure I have nothing to lose.
“I said that your butt looks nice in those jeans,” I tell him, inspecting my fingernails in an attempt at nonchalance.
“Oh… righty,” He smiles uncertainly for a few seconds, then when this information finally makes sense to him, he grins, his face bright and cheerful. “Thanks dude!”
Kaoru calls him sternly from the other end of the bus and he bounces off, waving goodbye to me enthusiastically. I nod in response, my stomach flailing angrily as my eyes follow him down the narrow aisle between the messy bunks. My heart sinks, just like it always does after every other wasted opportunity and I lean against the wall.
“Ah, Toshiya…” I whisper. Followed by a chuckle.
There is nothing more to say.
A name in itself that describes such an object of beauty. The name itself is enough to describe him. The other person, sitting across from you, listening to your words flow endlessly into each other without really understanding what the hell you’re saying finally gets what you mean when you simply say “Toshiya.”
They just say “Ah,” in response. There is nothing more to say.
It’s Sunday night, another performance has ended and everyone but Toshiya is exhausted. I watch him dancing around like he always does, that same old adorably goofy grin plastered on his face. Kaoru does his grumpy old man act and tells him off for not settling down. I laugh quietly to myself, following them back to the bus. But my laughter is shaky and nervous as I prepare myself to say what I’ve wanted to say to him for years. Three little words.
“Toshiya…”
He turns to me, still grinning, his make up smudged from sweat. I recoil slightly as he looks like he’s about to launch himself at me. Kaoru walks off, muttering something under his breath.
“Yeah, Daidai?” He asks, holding his middle finger up at Kaoru’s back. My stomach turns uncomfortably, making me feel nauseous. How was I going to say this? How the hell was I going to say this? I push my hair out of my eyes to stop it sticking to my forehead.
“I, er… I…” I blush violently, my face a livid red with embarrassment, my brain pulls a random thought from the air and puts it into my mouth, the words blurting out in a muddle of sounds. “Your butt looks real nice in those jeans!”
“What?” He stares at me, eyebrows raised in confusion.
“Nothing,” My eyes dart round the room, looking at everything but him.
Then, silence. A heart-stopping, intense silence in which he processes what I’ve just said and I turn a vivid scarlet colour, matching the colour of my hair, my skin burning fiercely. I curse myself internally, my mind swarming with annoyance at my cowardice and stupidity. I find myself begging the ground to swallow me whole or lightning to strike me.
“No, seriously, Die. I have no idea what you just said,” He smiles, amused. I can’t tell if he’s being serious or not. My eyes narrow at him, wondering if he just wants me to make a fool out of myself again. But I figure I have nothing to lose.
“I said that your butt looks nice in those jeans,” I tell him, inspecting my fingernails in an attempt at nonchalance.
“Oh… righty,” He smiles uncertainly for a few seconds, then when this information finally makes sense to him, he grins, his face bright and cheerful. “Thanks dude!”
Kaoru calls him sternly from the other end of the bus and he bounces off, waving goodbye to me enthusiastically. I nod in response, my stomach flailing angrily as my eyes follow him down the narrow aisle between the messy bunks. My heart sinks, just like it always does after every other wasted opportunity and I lean against the wall.
“Ah, Toshiya…” I whisper. Followed by a chuckle.
There is nothing more to say.