You're the Direction I Follow

“So you’re going to be working with Nick again,” my friend Mitchie asked me, leaning back against my headboard. “Won’t that be awkward, especially after you professed your undying love for him last time you say them?”

“I did not profess my dying love,” I said, heat rising to my cheeks. “It was just a small crush.”

“Mackenzie, you stalked the kid,” she reminded me.

“It was not stalking, he had told me he would be at the pizza place,” I threw my pillow at her. She laughed and ducked out of the way. “Besides, I didn’t know he would be there at that time.”

“Yeah, yeah you can keep lying to yourself, but you can’t lie to me,” she laughed. “I know you too well. But seriously Kenz, won’t it be weird working with him again?”

I sighed. “Yeah, if I even get the part. Otherwise, I don’t have to worry about it.”

“Get the part,” she scoffed. “You’re Mackenzie freaking Torres. This is like your comeback after two long agonizing Mackenzie-free years,” she dramatized. I rolled my eyes at her. “Besides, just having your name in the advertises would get the movie to be a number one box office hit. You know this role is as good as yours. You might as well start packing your trailer stuff now. Be sure to pack me a pillow, because no way in hell am I sharing a pillow with you again when I come visit you on set.”

“Honestly Mitch,” I sighed. “I don’t know if I’d even accept it even if they did want to cast me.”

She glowered at me. “Are you serious Mackenzie,” she demanded. “This is like the role for your best comeback ever. How could you not?”

I started playing with my bedspread, not wanting to meet her eyes. I knew I would break if I did. “I don’t know if I can anymore,” I said. “I mean it’s been two years, and I haven’t been—“

“Don’t feed me that forgot how to act or whatever bull shit Mackenzie,” Mitchie rolled her eyes, cutting me off. “I know you better than that. And I know what this is really about.”

“Mitchie—“

I was cut off again, but this time by someone opening my bedroom door. Monica came in, her face ecstatic. That face could only mean one thing. “I told you you still had it,” she hugged me. “Good job hun.”

I sighed as she continued telling me how well the casters had thought I was. I didn’t look at her, keeping my eyes glued to the ground. I had gotten it, but did I want it? “Monica,” I stopped her.

“What,” she asked me.

“How mad do you think they would be if I said no?”

---

I was going to be working with Mackenzie again. That would definitely be weird. I remembered the day she had told me she liked me. I wanted to tell her I liked her too. But I couldn’t. I had wanted to, but with everything going on, I was too busy to have a girlfriend. I knew we would be leaving soon for California, and I couldn’t do that to her, tell her I liked her so much and then leave her. But that didn’t mean I forgot about her when we left. I still liked her. And when we heard her sister died, I was heartbroken. I knew she must be in so much agony without her sister, and I wouldn’t be able to help her.

But there she was yesterday, reading lines. She looked amazing. She was strong, so that was expected. But I couldn’t help but notice something was missing in her, something in her eyes.

The caster had called and told us she had been cast for the role of my love interest, and I couldn’t be more happier. Mackenzie and I had a certain connection on stage, and I hoped off as well. I wondered if she would want to practice lines with me, maybe over dinner.

“Hey,” Joe said, coming into my room.

“Hey, do you think Mackenzie will want to practice lines together,” I asked him. He had always known Mackenzie pretty well before.

“Didn’t you hear,” he asked.

“Hear what?”

“Mackenzie might not be playing the role,” he told me.

I gasped. “What? Why?”

He shrugged. “There weren’t details. But from what dad said, her manager said she wasn’t sure if she wanted to do it or not.”

“She has to,” I insisted.

“Yeah, that’s why I came in here. The caster guy asked Dad if you could talk to her.”

“You mean like convince her to take the role,” I asked, confused.

“Yeah,” Joe said. “They really want her.”

“She’s Mackenzie Torres, of course they want her,” I smiled slightly. “Who doesn’t?”

He laughed. “Okay Romeo, so will you do it?”

“I’ll try,” I promised. And I really would. Mackenzie had to take the role. I needed to be on stage with her again.