Our Bodies Breath off the City Streetlights

Another day passed by. Another day of seeing faces in the crowd, and wishing it was hers. The wind blew his hair out of his eyes. The wind smelled like her. Everything around him reminded of her.

Another day spent at the moving bus. Another day of wishing to be near her. The sound of tires screeching against the pavement ruthlessly reminded him of her. The way she would smile when she sees him, the way her eyes would lit up when she smiles, the way she said, “I love you”.

But it’s all in the past now. The smile, the shine, the “I love you”. She was not there. And he was not there for her.

They existed together, but their lives were going separately. He wanted to play his music, to be heard, appreciated, possibly loved. She wanted to stay in the shadows, behind her work.

The only thing they had in common was each other. Like looking into a mirror and see your reflection. The perfect twins. The fitting half of one entity.

But it’s all in the past now. The mirror, the reflection, twins fell apart, the whole was separated in two.

“Who are you?” The girl asked.

“I'm Peter. Your boyfriend.” The boy said.

“But I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“You do now.”

So many memories were buried in the pavement beneath his feet. The city air was heavy it burned his lungs. But not even the air could stop him from going to the crowded airport. Because she will be there.

Never being the fan of flying, the girl dug her fingernails into the armrest, as the big, metal bird touched the ground. Thankful that her feet could actually stay still, she took her bag and headed towards exit. Towards him. Because he will be there.

The sky looked just like she remembered it. The beautiful shades of red, pink, blue and yellow strew across the infinite canvas, mixing into one whole. One whole.

She closed her eyes, gathering the courage to talk to him, to clear things out.

“I love you.” The girl said with a smile.

“I love you too.” The boy responded with a smile.

One. Two. Three knocks.

No answer.

Closing her eyes, she turned around, head lowered down so that accident passersby don’t see the tears falling from here yes. He wasn’t there. And she felt the familiar feeling coming back. Breaking her into pieces.

“I have to tell you something.” The girl said, trying to suppress the tears that threaten to fall down her eyes.

“What is it?” The boy asked with concern washing his voice. He hated seeing her cry. It made him cry too.

“I think we should break up.”

Silence.

Silence.

Much the same like the one that broke them apart. The silence that contained so many unanswered questions.

Why? How? WHY?

He didn’t knew the answers to those questions. But he knew that the silence killed him.

“Why would you want to break up?” The boy asked.

“I just don’t see the future for us.” The girl said, her voice shaking.

“I thought you love me.” He whispered almost inaudible, but loud enough for her to hear.

“I lied.” She said looking at his eyes.

People were pushing each other, trying to get out from the crowded airport. Every single face he saw, held some emotions. The emotions he almost forgot it exists. He ignored the faces, the feelings, and joined the pushing crowd, going in opposite direction. He pushed his way through the pulsing mass of moving bodies. His heartbeat was matching his steps.

Faster and faster.

He imagined her, standing there with her small red bag, clothes worn to many times to count, but still looked amazing on her. Her golden hair falling on her shoulders, her red-rimmed glasses on the tip of her nose, because she was too lazy to get contacts. A smile attached to her perfect, plush lips, her eyes lit up whenever she saw him. The sound of her voice when she said, “I love you”.

His heart stopped beating with every step that brought him closer. Because she wasn’t there.

He hung his head low and let the mass of people leaving the airport take him away too. It was another false promise. Another lie. Another heartbreak.

The night has fall down, the stars twinkled on the dark canvas, so beautiful, whether gathered in a group, or standing alone. Like a thousand matches lighten up at once. Like a tears falling from her eyes.

She looked at her worn out jeans, her red bag lying next to her feet, her red glasses stained with tears. She hoped that he would be there, just like he always was. In his tight jeans, his worm hoodie, with lips pursed because he missed another beat. Her tears started falling faster down her face. Because he wasn’t there.

Looking at the distant city streetlights, with teary eyes, she stood up and started walking back the route to the airport. For there was no other reason for her to stay. With one final glance at the small house, she walked away leaving it all behind. Leaving him behind.

He looked at the ceiling in his bedroom, trying to find the reason why would she do that again to him. He rolled over, facing the empty half of the bed. The half where she used to sleep. He moved over and buried his face into the pillow she used to lay her head on. The pillow still smelled like her. He took a deep breath, his eyes started to tear up at the memories.

“We made it.” The boy screamed and hugged the girl.

“What do you mean?” The girl asked, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“We got the record deal.” The boy was more that excited.

She was truly happy for him, she knew how important it was for him. But it also meant a life spent on a bus, touring, horde of girls screaming his name, confessing their undying love to him. She trusted him. She knew that he would never do anything to hurt her. But in time she felt like a burden. She didn’t wanted to be a burden to him.

She wanted him to be happy, enjoining the fame, being free to do whatever he wanted, without a girlfriend waiting for him so that they would spend another night fighting. She set him free.

They were the same. Like looking at your own reflection in the mirror. And yet, they were so different. He wanted the world, and he wanted it now. She wanted him, but she knew she couldn’t have him.