If I Never Hold You

If I Never Hold You Ch. 9- Break Me

I slowly opened my eyes, still in Johnny’s arms. “Surprised you’re up this early. But, I was thinking…” he said. Glancing up, I found him staring straight ahead. “Do you wanna go on a date on Wednesday?”

My heart fluttered but before I answered, he spoke again. “Oh, ok, cool!” I looked closer as he turned his head. He was on his cell. I felt my heart break more but he grinned at me. “Alright. Later.”

“Who was that? Britney?” I said, my fists clenched as I spoke her name.

“Yeah. Our first date on Wednesday.” He replied.

I nodded, faking a smile then got up to find Danny on the phone. When he hung up, he turned to me. “I just asked out Amy!” he exclaimed. “She said yes!” I instantly embraced him. “The date’s at 3.” He looked at the clock.

“You’re gonna leave, huh?” I asked.

“Do you mind? I have to-”

“Get ready, I know! Have fun! Now get your ass outa here!” he soon rushed out the door. “Ok, so it’s 1 now, what’d ya wanna do?”

“I have to leave. Mom wants me back.” Ali said sadly.

“Me too. Skating at 1:30.” Crystal added.

“Alright, call me later, girls!” I called as they began walking away.

Brian followed Ali and before she left, I sound them kissing. How sweet!

Ali’s POV

“I’ll see ya later?” Brian asked after our kiss. Wow. He has the softest fucking lips!

“Of course!” I giggled, pecking his lips once more and scurrying out the door.

Mel’s POV

When Ali and Crys left, I sat down with a sigh.

“Sorry Mel, we gotta go too.” Matt said, pointing to Jimmy and Zacky.

“Oh, it’s cool! Did you have a good time?” I asked.

“Yeah! Fun shit!” Zacky said.

“Great party!” Jimmy added.

“Thanks! So I’ll see ya tomorrow at school?” I replied. They moaned, leaving the house. “You guys leavin too?”

“Nah, I got nothing else to do.” Johnny shrugged.

“Me neither!” Brian said. Just then, his cell rang, and when he was off, he sighed. “Mom says I need to go home and do some fucking chores.”

“Alright, it’s fine. See ya!” I waved when he left.

“So, what do ya wanna do?” Johnny asked.

“Whatever.”

“What’s wrong?” he asked, leaning over to me. I shook my head. “How bout we go walk around this place?”

“You want a tour of this stupid city?” I asked, shocked.

“Yeah!” he pulled me to my feet and I grabbed my key as he pulled me out the door. I locked it and we left. I decided to take him down the main road to a Starbucks. “What do you want?” he asked as we walked in.

“Oh, no. I couldn’t ask you to-”

“I insist.” He turned to me. I blushed.

“Café Vanilla Frappachino.” I said. He ordered one, getting a strawberry banana one and we continued our tour, now going to the park again.

“What’s down here?” he pulled me down a dirt path.

“You’re crazy!” I giggled.

I stared into the deep water of the river but heard music through the once silent forest. I saw Johnny pull out his cell.

“Hello?” he paused but soon began poking me. “Uh huh…”

I giggled. “Johnny!” he almost pushed me in the water but pulled me back.

Our eyes locked; we were so close at this moment. “Yeah, I’m with Mel, why? …Ok, all of the sudden? Alright. Bye.” He closed his phone, sliding it back in his pocket. “Brittney wants me to go over so…”

I bit my tongue in rage. Ow! Ugh, why the fuck am I so reckless?

Without a word, I walked back up to the main path, exiting the park with Johnny following.

“She lives up there.” I informed, pointing down her street.

“Uh…ok. I’ll see you later?” he was taken aback by my behavior.

“Yeah.” I mumbled, continuing to walk down my street, leaving Johnny to stand there. After a moment, I glanced back to see him still standing there, staring directly at me.

But he turned, smiling at the blonde who jumped into his arms.

A sting in my chest told me to run.

My legs moved fiercely as my feet carried my heavy heart towards my house. Tears threatened to fall, stinging in my eyes. ‘She came. She’s just fucking with me. Trying to tear me down’ I told myself.

And it’s working…