Misery

Catherine still couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that she had told Adam she was done with him, done with their relationship. She knew she meant it, yes, but sticking to it was another story. Adam had a way of getting exactly what he wanted. And Catherine found herself falling victim to his words many times before.

She ran a hand through her hair as she stood in her and Adam’s bedroom. She glanced from the closet, to the dresser, to the bed where she had placed a large, empty suitcase. She sighed and held tears back as she walked to her dresser and pulled out her socks, under garments, pajamas, and a few bathing suits, throwing them into the bottom of the bag, until all that was left was Adam’s things.

With still a lot of room in the suitcase, she tucked all of her shoes into the side pockets, some having to rest on top of the clothes already placed in the bag. Jeans, skirts, and shirts were pulled from the closet and thrown in messily. Catherine sighed, knowing she didn’t want to stick around to fold them properly.

She left the bedroom and walked into the bathroom, grabbing all of her things from in there. Throwing it in a plastic bag, she placed in the suitcase. She grabbed some of her other things: her laptop, books, CDs, DVDs, and somehow shoved them in the bag, as well. It barely zippered, but she didn’t care. She grabbed her purse and dragged her things into the living room, just as the apartment door opened and Adam walked inside.

At first he didn’t see her; his nose was buried in the Chicago Tribune. He turned and closed the door behind him, while Catherine stood frozen in her spot. When he finally looked up, he smiled at her.

“Cat,” He mused, moving to her, but stopped short when he saw her bags.

He looked at her questioningly, realization visible on his face. Catherine couldn’t bare to look at him, so she settled for staring at their hardwood floors. Dropping her bags, she let out a deep sigh, knowing she wouldn’t be able to leave without confrontation.

“Cat…” He said again, but more softly.

Catherine closed her eyes tightly and shook her head, as he brought a hand to her jaw, running his thumb over his cheek. She was unable to hold back tears, as Adam moved his body to hers, still keeping his hand on her jaw, and wrapping his free arm around her.

“Cat, I love you.”

She shook her head against his chest, more tears silently falling, “No, you don’t.”

He sighed and moved back from her, bringing his other hand to rest on the other side of her jaw, holding her head so she was forced to face him.

“Open your eyes,” He told her, softly.

When Catherine shook her head and kept her eyes closed, Adam said it again, but more sternly. Catherine sighed and opened her eyes slowly, revealing her bloodshot, green eyes.

She chanced a glance at Adam to see his expression, and she was surprised to see a pained look. In a sick moment, she thought, she was happy to see that he was upset. After him hurting her over and over, she was slightly giddy that he was the one hurting now.

“I,” He started, staring at her sadly.

Catherine looked up and still kept her hands limply at her side, trying to look anywhere but at Adam, but it was hard; he was still holding her jaw gently, but firmly enough to prevent her from moving.

He seemed to take a deep breath and he continued again, “I was so stupid… So stupid because I hurt you.”

Catherine finally raised her gaze to meet his bright blue eyes, but instead she saw dull blue eyes, clouded by sadness. She shifted on her feet and rubbed a hand over her forehead.

“Say something, Cat. Anything.”

She pulled herself away from him and paced up and down the living room. If she gave up on Adam, she would be giving up everything she ever knew. She looked at him, and knew instantly what her decision was going to be. The way his bright blue eyes bore into her, as if he could see all of her…

“Adam,” She said, turning to him.

She let more tears fall, not being able to hold them back. Adam moved to comfort her, but she held her hand up and he stood rooted to his spot.

“You’ve hurt me. A lot.”

He nodded, looking ashamed.

“But because I love you so much… I can’t give up on us yet.”

He smiled and once again moved to be near her, and again; she stopped him.

“Just know, you have one more chance, Adam. I can’t… I can’t do it anymore, okay?”

Adam nodded his head, wrapping his arms around her finally, “I love you so much, Cat. I promise you that I will be the most fantastic boyfriend you could ever ask for.”

She laughed into his shoulder, “You don’t have to do that, just be faithful, okay?”

He moved back from her, staring at her green eyes with his blue ones. He moved to press his lips to hers, and she instantly melted into him. She felt like it had been months since they kissed. Sure, there were small pecks of kisses here and there, but they hadn’t really kissed in months. And as Adam kissed her, he realized it too.

As they stood in the living room of their apartment, Adam lifted Catherine off of her feet, wrapping his arms around her midsection. Catherine laughed lightly and wrapped her legs around Adam’s waist, grabbing onto his hair as they continued to kiss.

“Adam,” She gasped, as he bit down on her neck. “You’re an ass.”

He laughed lightly before kissing the spot he had bit. He walked them from the living room and into their bedroom, throwing Catherine onto the bed when they got there. She laughed at him as he quickly ripped his shirt off and began working on his pants. Bringing a hand on top of his, she stopped him.

He looked at her questioningly, but she only smiled and pulled him down on top of her. Adam grunted as he fell onto the bed and on top of his girlfriend. Catherine wrapped her arms around Adam, running her hands over his muscular back.

Adam slipped his hand up Catherine’s shirt, grabbing at her chest. She gasped at the coldness of his touch, and was too distracted to realize Adam had pulled her shirt off and was working on the clasp of her bra.

He kissed along her chest and stomach as he pulled her pants off, pulling her underwear with them. Catherine bit her lip and watched as he stood and slid his pants and boxers off. He stood at the side of the bed and stared down at his naked girlfriend as she stared back at him.

“I love you,” He told her, realizing how long it had been since they had been together; instead he had been with other girls.

“Just get over here, Adam,” Catherine practically whined, reaching out toward him.

He smiled at her and moved to rest on top of her. He brought his hand to her jaw as he rested on his elbows. He rubbed his thumb over her cheek, gently kissing her lips as he pressed himself into her.

Catherine relished the feeling of being with Adam again. To say that she had missed his kisses and touches was an understatement. She felt empty without him. And now that she had all of him on the most intimate way, she felt whole, completed.

With a few final thrusts both Adam and Catherine collapsed onto the bed, completely exhausted. Adam pulled the covers on top of them, wrapping his arms around Catherine. She smiled into his chest and leaned up to kiss him.

“I love you,” He murmured again before falling asleep.

Catherine could only smile and whisper the words back, even though he couldn’t hear her. But, as she tossed and turned, not being able to fall asleep, she wondered why she was uneasy.

After hours spent laying awake while Adam slept, Catherine sighed and wondered if by giving Adam yet another chance, she had made the biggest mistake of her life.