Abercrombie & Bitch

Friday, April 24, 5:09pm – home

I half-heartedly dragged myself up the stairs to my front door, with Mowgli in tow. Rob had insisted that I keep him for the weekend, since his parents were coming to visit and didn’t really like him all that well. I didn’t ask; sometimes it’s better not to know.

Thursday was rocky, as far as my ‘relationship’ with Zach went. It seemed like no one believed we were really ‘dating’. I guess I underestimated their intelligence. Anyway, Zach had been extra touchy-feely yesterday and today, and I was getting a little annoyed. I got the strange feeling that many times, he wasn’t actually faking it. I don’t know what was scarier: the fact that Zach might actually be enjoying this for purposes other than making me miserable, or the fact that the entire female population of Redford High – besides Riley – currently despised me for it.

I think it was a tie.

As I walked in the door, my cell phone vibrated in my pocket. I yanked it out and glanced at the screen.

New Message From: Riley

Hey, Miranda, can I sleep over tonight? My parents… they freaked.

I exhaled loudly, realizing that I wasn’t going to be getting any sleep tonight. If she did come over – and what was I going to say to that? No? – she’d spend the whole night talking about Mika or complaining about her parents. I guess we’d have a slightly different topic… but, regardless, I’d have to call Donelle. I wasn’t going to deal with her alone.

Sure, invite Elle, too, I texted back quickly, shoving my phone in my pocket.

“Mandy! Mandy!” Meg squealed, running into the hallway and nearly knocking over the glass vase there. I caught her just in time and hoisted her up onto my hip. Mowgli started sniffing around the house, but he was otherwise uninterested.

“Hey,” I laughed, fixing her shirt so that it was facing the right way, “What did I tell you about doing that, huh? You’ll hurt yourself.”

She stuck her lower lip out, in a pout that only worked for little kids. Sometimes I wish I could still pull it off. “Mandy, Daddy’s here!”

I froze. No. That’s impossible.

About a month after Meg was born, my mom was starting to suffer from depression. Once again, she was on what I’ve called in the past a pregnancy high – she wanted more of that feeling. Dad had always been the sensible one in the family, I guess. Mom wanted to have another baby, but Dad knew that it wasn’t a good idea. He’d told her, flat-out, that he wasn’t going to give her any more kids.

So she kicked him out of the house.

We were all furious with her for it. I didn’t speak to her for six months, except for the occasional grocery list and what not. Harper started loathing the world – especially Meg, whom she blamed for it. Lindsey didn’t seem to notice, since she was in seventh grade and didn’t care much about anything but boys. Olivia was only in kindergarten, she didn’t understand. I think Andrea and I were the most affected, because, well, we knew exactly why Dad was gone.

I’d been the only one to keep steady contact with Dad over these last three years. Andrea missed him, of course, but she was always busy at college and her job that she didn’t have time. Apparently, he’d met a very nice lady named Donna who I absolutely had to meet someday. They’d gotten married about a year ago – and I had received pictures of the wedding, since Mom wouldn’t let me go. Truthfully, I really liked Donna from talking to her via my dad and email. She was a much better match for my Dad than my mom was.

Sometimes I wish she’d realize it. She knows about Donna, and the new baby that she and my dad just had, and she despises it. She didn’t know I’d still had any contact with him, and I was willing to keep it that way.

But… Dad and Donna lived in Pittsburgh now. That was almost a day’s drive away. What was he doing here?

“Dad?!” I called, rushing into the kitchen. I remembered that that was his favorite part of the house, because he loved to cook. He always did all the cooking. He was the one that taught Andrea and me how to cook, since Mom certainly wasn’t going to. “Dad?! Are you here?”

I almost couldn’t believe it. That was really my father, sitting in the kitchen and drinking coffee from his mug like he always did. We even still had his – a white, porcelain mug that Andrea and I had painted one Father’s Day when we were little. His blonde hair was neatly combed, and he’d started growing what looked like a goatee on his chin. His golden-green eyes sparkled when he saw me – the very same eyes I’d inherited.

I smiled so wide it hurt my muscles. I set Meg down gently and rushed over to him, meeting him half-hug and holding onto him for dear life. “Dad…” I managed, my voice hoarse and my eyes clouded with tears.

I hadn’t actually seen my dad since my mom took the case to court and gained full custody of my sisters and me – I’d talked to him through emails and Face Book and cards on our birthdays. I’d said that I wanted to live with my dad, but I also couldn’t leave Meg and Olivia in the care of someone like my mother. She’d turn them into very, very bad people, and I wasn’t going to let her. I might have always been Daddy’s little girl, and I liked it.

I missed my dad.

His chest rumbled as he laughed, smoothing my hair down. “How’s my Miri?”

My chest tightened. No one had called me Miri in years – well, besides Zach, who didn’t seem to get that I didn’t want him to. It was my dad’s nickname, and his only. He’d given it to me when I was little, mostly because of my name – the first two letters, anyway – but also because I used to LOVE drawing these little flowers. No one ever knew what they were, until one night Dad was looking them up and found out that they were, appropriately, miri flowers.

I sniffled. “I’m good, Dad.” He smelled the same as he did when I was little. Sniffing again, I pulled away. “What are you doing in Maryland? Is everything okay?”

He smiled his perfect-teeth smile. “Everything’s fine. I had a meeting up in Baltimore today, and I thought I’d surprise you girls.”

I hugged him again quickly before stepping back, and looking him up and down. He was had on a dress shirt and pants, but they were kind of scruffy-looking – like he’d been gone all day at work and was just getting home. The memory of it brought new tears to my eyes, but I fought them back.

I got up and got myself a soda, sitting down at the little booth across from my dad. I remember doing this very same thing so many times when I was thirteen. We’d watch game shows, and then discuss which topics were hard and which could have been made by a seven-year-old. I’d been surprisingly smart back then; it wasn’t so different now, I guess, except that I just didn’t try anymore.

“Well, I’m definitely surprised,” I muttered, cupping the soda can in my hands.
Meg climbed up in the booth next to me and snuggled into my side. She only did that when she was scared – I guess she didn’t remember Dad that well. I’d shown her pictures when he sent them. She knew who Donna was, and the new baby, Sean. She knew Dad. But she didn’t know him, if you know what I mean.

He flashed me a smile. “So how’s life been treatin’ ya, Kiddo?” he asked, taking a sip of his coffee. I didn’t know how he’d gotten it, but it wasn’t that hard to guess that he’d made it himself.

I shrugged, still grinning. “Um… okay, I guess.” I ran a shaky hand through my short hair.

Dad noticed. “Nice haircut, by the way.” He gave me a thumbs up. “Very…edgy. You look very grown-up.”

I have to tell you, hearing my dad say something about my haircut had to be the weirdest moment of my life. It was an almost out-of-body experience. I hadn’t thought I’d be able to see my dad again, let alone talk about something as trivial as my hair.

Wait. Did he just call my hair edgy?

I made a very unattractive snorting noise. “Thanks, Dad. I think.” I took a sip of my soda. “How’s Donna and Sean?”

The way my dad’s eyes lit up made everything right. It was like… Like everything that we’d had to go through, with the divorce, and Dad moving away, and then his wedding… It all seemed worth it, just to see him that happy.

He launched into a full story of their lives. How Sean still couldn’t sleep through the night, like Lindsey and Harper never could. How he loved to watch TV, just like I did. How he had to read a different story to him every night, because he already knew the all, like Andrea. How Donna would sit in the rocking chair when the bedtime stories wouldn’t work and gently rock him until he fell asleep, like Dad used to do with Olivia…

I thought, if it ever came to this, that I would feel angry. Replaced. But I didn’t. The more Dad told me about Sean – my half brother – the more I recognized the little quirks and traits in my sisters. The ones that we always pretended weren’t there, but were still part of us.

They were part of Dad.

Suddenly he cut himself off. “I’m rambling again, aren’t I? I came here to hear about you.” He smiled again. “So talk.”

I didn’t know if I should tell him about the thing with Zach. Maybe he wouldn’t understand, not having to deal with teenage girls lately. But… This was Dad. He always understood.

And so I told him. Everything. From Bryce – whom he wasn’t happy with, not one bit – to Rob, and then finally to Zach and the whole talent show thing. And, yeah, he wasn’t happy with the grades, either, and I’d had to swear on my life that I’d get everything straight. But he still listened.

“…And now I don’t know,” I admitted, swirling the remains of my soda around in the can. Meg had fallen asleep by now, along with Mowgli, who had joined her on the bench. “It’s just… I don’t know if I can trust him.”

Dad was silent for a moment. Then, he started recalling old times. “Kiddo, I remember when you and Zach when you were little. You two…” He chuckled and shook his head. “You two got into more trouble than I’d ever imagined. But you were inseparable. If Kate-” Zach’s mom, “-even tried getting Zach to come in, both of you would throw a fit. Kate and Liz always talked about how you and he would end up marrying each other. And the way you were talking about him just now…” He ran a hand through his hair, the very same habit I had. “Well, maybe they weren’t that far off.”

I scoffed. “Unlikely, Dad. Zach never stops with the tormenting…” Except when he’s talking about old times. But for some reason, I wanted to keep that to myself.

“Have you ever heard, ‘He teases you because he likes you’?” Dad grinned. “Boys never learn anything but that, Miri. I don’t think Zach would try so hard to make things right… If he didn’t care about you. A lot.”

I sighed and stroked Meg’s hair out of her face. Dad had a good point, I guess. I couldn’t help thinking about that one kiss; it replayed over and over again in my mind until it felt like more of a dream than a memory. I’d thought my crush on Zach had ended years ago… But maybe that explained why I never really cared much about Bryce. Or why I’d wanted to break up with him. Or why I’d so hastily agreed to pretend to date Zach, because even though I knew I was pretending, there was some little part of me that had kept that crush alive…

Okay, now I’m talking crazy.

“Thanks, Dad,” I grumbled, “I’ll keep that in mind.”

He grinned and glanced at the clock. His smile faded. “Damn. I’m real sorry, Kiddo, but I’ve got to go. My train’s going to leave without me if I don’t get going.”

I nodded and stood up, wrapping my arms around my dad’s torso and hugging him tight. He pressed his chin into my hair, like he always used to do. I could feel myself start to tear up, but I wasn’t going to let myself cry. Dad was happy with Sean and Donna. Maybe I’d get to meet them, in time. Right now, they were the ones that needed him most – we were fine here on our own.

“Bye, Kiddo,” he whispered, giving me one last kiss on the forehead.

“Later, Dad.”

And just like that, he was gone. I mean, I saw him walk out the door, but not before giving Meg a kiss and Mowgli a pat on the head. Lindsey and Harper weren’t home, and Olivia was at some rocket camp or whatever for the weekend.

I don’t know how long I sat at the booth, staring into space. I thought about my father, and Zach, and everything else.

I was jolted awake by the sound of the door opening and closing. It was Riley and Donelle, with their sleeping bags and clothes and stuff. They trudged into the kitchen and immediately saw that something was up.

“You okay?” Riley asked softly, placing a reassuring hand on my arm.

I snapped out of my daze and nodded.

“Better than okay.”