Symphony Of Sympathy

I forced my eyes open, only to quickly shut them. The light was blinding. My head was pounding. Stupid hangover. I thought back to last night, but couldn't remember anything besides the show, and then getting trashed. How did I even get home last night? I opened my eyes once more, to see Conner staring at me.

"Finally awake, love?" he smiled, reaching his hand over to tuck some hair behind my ear.

"Mmhmm," I nod, stretching my neck to give him a small peck on the lips.

"Yeh came home trashed last night," Conner frowned. "Did anythin' 'appen?"

A frown formed on my lips. Didn’t he trust me? "No, Con, nothin' 'appened," I told him, some memories from last night coming back to me. Nothing had happened- except that Oli and I were just friends. "I promise."

"Oh, okay... Well, I 'ave to get ready for class. What are yeh doin' today?" Con asked, climbing out of bed.

I thought back to last night, trying to remember if I had made plans. And I had. With Oli. "I um, I think I'm jus' gonna 'ang out wit' the boys. Not really sure what we're doin', though."

Conner finished changing, and walked over to me. He kissed my lips, then the top of my head. "Jus' be safe. I'll see yeh tonight." We shared our goodbyes, and off he went to class.

I slowly climbed out of bed, heading towards the shower. It worried me how much Conner didn’t trust me. Not that I had earned his trust. But for months, I have been so good, and he still doesn’t trust me. I turned the water on, slowly stripping out of my clothes. My head still ached from my hangover, but it wasn’t as bad now. I breathed in the steam, letting the hot water rush over my body. I let my mind go numb as I cleaned my skin, then my hair.

Oliver and I agreed, just friends. I still couldn’t understand why Conner was so paranoid. Once I was finished with the shower, I climbed out, wrapping myself in a towel. I grabbed my cell phone, calling Oli.

"Um, hi, Oli. I don’t know if yeh remember, but we made plans to 'ang out today," I said awkwardly, trying to dry my hair with the towel.

"Yeah, I remember. I'm surprised yeh still want to though. I thought it was just the alcohol that made yeh agree to bein' friends wit meh," Oliver laughed lightly, and I shook my head, although he couldn't see me.

"No, no. I uh, I actually 'ave a plan for what to do today... If yeh want, I mean," I mumbled, pulling on a gray skirt. Then I grabbed a fuzzy green sweater, pulling it over my head.

"Of course I want to. I 'aven't hung out wit yeh in so long. What do yeh want to do?"

"It's um, it's a surprise, if that’s okay wit yeh," I explained, thinking about what I had planned. "I'll come pick yeh up in a little bit, if yeh want..."

"I'll be waitin'," Oli said cheerfully, and the phone clicked off. I ran my hands over my face, suddenly doubting if I was ready to do this. But it was too late to change my mind. I grabbed my car keys and pulled on a pair of plain black flats before heading out of the apartment towards my car. I took a deep breath, turned on the car, and began driving towards the hotel Oli was staying at. I was ready. Hopefully.

********************************

"'Ello, love," Oliver grinned, climbing into my car. "Yeh look nice."

I smiled. "Same goes to yeh, Oli. 'ave yeh gotten even more tattoos?" My eyes glanced over the extreme amount of ink covering his skin. One day he'd regret all that.

"Jus' a few," he laughed, looking at his own arms. "So, what do yeh 'ave planned for us today?"

"I um... I want to take yeh somewhere. Somewhere I 'aven't been in years," I explained, staring at the road. Street signs flew past me as I tried to remember how to get there. "I... I need to visit, b-but... I was scared to do it alone."

Oli stared at me with his beautiful hazel eyes full of concern and confusion. "I'm here for yeh," he smiled. I nodded, my anxiety starting to get to me. I couldn't speak; I was too busy focusing on breathing normally. Inhale. Exhale. In. Out. Over and over, trying to stop my anxiety from taking control. Finally, we were there. I pulled into the parking lot, turning off the car.

Oliver seemed even more confused as he looked around where we were.

"My sister, Sierra... This is where she's buried," I said, choking back tears as I climbed out of the car. Oli's mouth formed in "O" as he suddenly understood. He hopped out of the car, hurrying after me.

"Shiloh," he said, noticing that a few tears had slipped out of my eyes. He grabbed onto my hand. "I'm here for yeh," he repeated.

"Thank you," I whispered, walking through the graveyard. I hadn't been here since her funeral, yet I could never forget where she was. Finally, we came to her gravestone, the name "Sierra Foster" carved into it. When I saw that, I began to sob, collapsing to the ground.

Oliver wouldn't release my hand. It was as if as soon as he let go, I'd be gone forever. I placed my other hand on the cold gravestone. Six feet under me was Sierra's body, a bullet deep in her chest. I hugged the gravestone, my tears running down the smooth stone. Oli sat down next to me.

"She was my best friend," I whispered, squeezing his hand tightly. "I still miss her, so much."

Oli released my hand, putting his arm around my shoulders instead and pulling me into a hug. He stroked my hair as I cried. I cried and cried and cried. My eyes burned as the tears soaked through his shirt. "Shh, it's okay," he comforted, still holding me close.

"She used to haunt me," I mumbled, realizing how silly I sounded.

"What do you mean?" He asked, pulling back from the hug.

"In Sheffield, she um... she was like my conscience. But when I came back to America, she stopped haunting me," I said, not explaining how she had hated Oliver.

"Oh," Oli whispered, and I wasn’t sure if he believed me.

"I feel like she can finally rest in peace though," I whispered, turning back to her grave. I leaned my forehead against the cold stone. I began whispering to Sierra. "I'll always love you. I miss you so much, it's not fair. But you helped me through so much, thank you. I'll see you again, but hopefully not too soon. I love you, Sierra. Goodbye." I gave the gravestone a small kiss, before standing up.

I rubbed away my tears, before holding a hand out to help Oli up. "I bet she misses yeh too," he said, standing up. "Yeh must 'ave been a great sister."

I looked up at him and I can see how sincere he is. "Thank yeh for bein' 'ere, Oli."

He wrapped his arms around me, kissing the top of my head. "Anything for yeh, love."

I smiled and grabbed his hand, walking back towards the parking lot where my car awaited. "I... I love yeh, Oli." I don't know what I was thinking when I said it, but it was true. I loved Oliver.

We reached my car. "Shiloh... I love yeh too," he said, leaning down to kiss me.

And next thing I knew, I was in the back seat of my car, with a half-naked Oliver pulling off my clothes.

And I thought to myself, oh shit. What have I done?