Sky Blue Eyes
Chapter One
I find it quite amusing that the color that calms me is also the color that haunts my dreams every single night.
Who am I you ask? My name is Alexis Lily Moore, and I live in a small town in rural Australia. When I say rural I actually mean the middle of no where though. And what’s the weather like in the middle of no where? It’s sunny. Always sunny. Clear blue skies with hardly a cloud in sight, nearly every single day of the year, and honestly, although I say otherwise, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I love nothing more than getting out of school to walk to my special place and just laying there staring into the blue that doesn’t hold the meaning of space or time. You can get lost quite easily in something that never ending and getting lost is what I live for.
I never used to be like this though. I used to be a rather hyper person, never really sat still for long and certainly not long enough to lose myself in the vastness of the sky. So why the change? Him and his god damn eyes that’s why.
Until the day I met him I’d never seen anyone with eyes that were such a perfect replica of the sky, and yet there he stood in front of me with deep blue eyes that made him look so pure and trustable. So…innocent. I’d spent year’s hoping that someone would move to town and show some promise, and finally the day had arrived.
If only I’d known what the outcome of him moving here would be, then I know I never would have made such a life altering request.
See everything started out so well. He instantly became one of my very best friends, and for the first time ever I felt wanted. Even more unbelievable was the fact that I felt needed. It seemed as though he needed me just as much as I needed him and it didn’t matter what we were in the middle of we were always there for each other when one of us needed the other person. Perhaps this was the downfall of perfection, because I ended up needing him too much. And he ended up not needing me at all.
I truly believe that I didn’t do anything to him though. That I didn’t do anything to cause the change. It’s taken me a long time to come to this conclusion though, and I’ve frustrated a lot of people in the process.
Sex is a funny thing. It changes relationships, and not always for the better.
See it was him who changed. The moment he started sleeping with her everything went downhill. All because sex mattered more to him than his supposed best friend, and that made me mad. Unbelievably infuriated, that he would choose some little slut over his ‘best friend’. Yea harsh word, but what else do you call a girl who refuses to start a relationship with someone because it would ‘narrow down her weekly selection’? That’s what I thought.
And he chose her over me and then had the nerve to ask me why I couldn’t be nice to her for his sake, and expected me not to react.
I now wish I hadn’t reacted, that I had just turned and walked away like I promised myself I would when he finally had the nerve to speak to me, but I didn’t. Something inside of me snapped, and so I looked him in the eyes and I shoved him. I shoved him right into the path of a car and I couldn’t tear my eyes away as he got hit. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from his sky blue ones as his body crumpled to the ground, nor when the ambulance arrived and loaded him in the back to take him to hospital.
And you know what he demanded when I got there and was finally allowed to see him? He demanded I go and find her and bring her to him. And you know what she did when I told her what had happened? She laughed. The evil little bitch laughed at the thought of him on his death bed, and so I hit her. And I continued to do so until her smug little smile was gone, but I shouldn’t have bothered with her.
I wasted my time to the extreme that when I got back to the hospital I was just in time to see his beautiful sky blue eyes close for the very last time.
And so now I’m haunted every time I close my eyes. My dreams are nightmares as I see over and over again the horror portrayed in his eyes as he realises what I’ve done. What’s going to happen to him after I shoved him.
Yet my waking moments are quite the opposite. I spend every minute of my free time here, in the cemetery, lying on top of his grave staring in to the abyss of blue that reminds me of his eyes. Eyes that were the perfect replica of the never ending expanse of blue sky.
Who am I you ask? My name is Alexis Lily Moore, and I live in a small town in rural Australia. When I say rural I actually mean the middle of no where though. And what’s the weather like in the middle of no where? It’s sunny. Always sunny. Clear blue skies with hardly a cloud in sight, nearly every single day of the year, and honestly, although I say otherwise, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I love nothing more than getting out of school to walk to my special place and just laying there staring into the blue that doesn’t hold the meaning of space or time. You can get lost quite easily in something that never ending and getting lost is what I live for.
I never used to be like this though. I used to be a rather hyper person, never really sat still for long and certainly not long enough to lose myself in the vastness of the sky. So why the change? Him and his god damn eyes that’s why.
Until the day I met him I’d never seen anyone with eyes that were such a perfect replica of the sky, and yet there he stood in front of me with deep blue eyes that made him look so pure and trustable. So…innocent. I’d spent year’s hoping that someone would move to town and show some promise, and finally the day had arrived.
If only I’d known what the outcome of him moving here would be, then I know I never would have made such a life altering request.
See everything started out so well. He instantly became one of my very best friends, and for the first time ever I felt wanted. Even more unbelievable was the fact that I felt needed. It seemed as though he needed me just as much as I needed him and it didn’t matter what we were in the middle of we were always there for each other when one of us needed the other person. Perhaps this was the downfall of perfection, because I ended up needing him too much. And he ended up not needing me at all.
I truly believe that I didn’t do anything to him though. That I didn’t do anything to cause the change. It’s taken me a long time to come to this conclusion though, and I’ve frustrated a lot of people in the process.
Sex is a funny thing. It changes relationships, and not always for the better.
See it was him who changed. The moment he started sleeping with her everything went downhill. All because sex mattered more to him than his supposed best friend, and that made me mad. Unbelievably infuriated, that he would choose some little slut over his ‘best friend’. Yea harsh word, but what else do you call a girl who refuses to start a relationship with someone because it would ‘narrow down her weekly selection’? That’s what I thought.
And he chose her over me and then had the nerve to ask me why I couldn’t be nice to her for his sake, and expected me not to react.
I now wish I hadn’t reacted, that I had just turned and walked away like I promised myself I would when he finally had the nerve to speak to me, but I didn’t. Something inside of me snapped, and so I looked him in the eyes and I shoved him. I shoved him right into the path of a car and I couldn’t tear my eyes away as he got hit. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from his sky blue ones as his body crumpled to the ground, nor when the ambulance arrived and loaded him in the back to take him to hospital.
And you know what he demanded when I got there and was finally allowed to see him? He demanded I go and find her and bring her to him. And you know what she did when I told her what had happened? She laughed. The evil little bitch laughed at the thought of him on his death bed, and so I hit her. And I continued to do so until her smug little smile was gone, but I shouldn’t have bothered with her.
I wasted my time to the extreme that when I got back to the hospital I was just in time to see his beautiful sky blue eyes close for the very last time.
And so now I’m haunted every time I close my eyes. My dreams are nightmares as I see over and over again the horror portrayed in his eyes as he realises what I’ve done. What’s going to happen to him after I shoved him.
Yet my waking moments are quite the opposite. I spend every minute of my free time here, in the cemetery, lying on top of his grave staring in to the abyss of blue that reminds me of his eyes. Eyes that were the perfect replica of the never ending expanse of blue sky.