Because These Words Were Meant For You

“Sarah!?” I gasped into the phone, tears falling down my cheeks as I stumbled down the back streets of downtown Hollywood. “Are the girls with you? Who are you with?”
“Babe?” She asked worriedly into the cellular device, I could just see the frown etched onto her face. “Are you alright? What’s wrong? Yeah, the girls are with me. And so are the guys.”
“I need to talk to you.” I stopped, leaning against the side of a building as I clutched my stomach desperately. “Sarah, he cheated on me.”
“What?!” She yelled, loud voices asking what was going on in the background. “He what?! How do you know?! What happened?”
“I caught him!” I was trying to breathe right, but only heavy huffs left my lips. “I walked in on him fucking some slut in our bed!”
“I’m going to kill that motherfucker!” She screamed, a loud ‘thwap’ echoing out as she no doubt hit something. “What the hell is wrong with him!? Oye! I might as well fucking cock slap that bitch!”
“Sarah,” Crying, I leaned down to tie my shoe, noticing that it had undone itself as I walked. “Sarah, where are you? I have to come see you. I don’t have a car and I can’t get in another accident. And I can’t go back to him. But I can’t be alone either.”
“Where are you!?” She screeched, shushing Johnny as he questioned her ear off. “You shouldn’t be by yourself! You’re about to pop!”
“I’m in front of the Pinkberry on Beverly,” I choked out as I wrapped my arms around my stomach. “Just please tell me where you are. I can’t do it anymore. Sarah, I’m about to lose it. I can’t sit here and think about him and about what he did; I’ll go insane. I need someone right now, and it’s not him. It can’t be.”
“We’re at Johnny and I’s apartment. Baby, do you want me to come get you?” I shook my head rapidly, then realized she couldn’t see me.
“No, thank you. I’ll be there in a few minutes.” I set myself walking in the right direction.
Well, it was more like stumbling actually.
“Be safe and we’ll be waiting for you.” With that she hung up, but not before I heard a course of long curses slip out of her lips, all laced with a thick British accent.
She was absolutely fuming.
As I walked, I cried my eyes out and stared down at my belly; my swelled pregnant stomach.
It hurt so bad.
Looking down at myself and seeing our baby inside of me; his baby. How could he do that to me? How could he hurt me like that? What happened to “I’m going to try and be a better man”? What happened to “I’m going to take care of you and our child”? What the hell even happened to “I love you”?
Because, there was no way in hell that he could love me if he had cheated on me. He wanted to have sex with another girl; that wasn’t love. He deliberately lied to me, telling me that he had band practice when in fact he was just going to fuck some slut.
Some slut in our bed no less!
But I never asked a question. I was so absolutely trusting and faithful to him that I never believed he could actually do that. Obviously, he had said things before, and it made me wonder, but after everything else, I didn’t think it was something to worry about.
I actually thought he cared about me; about his kid.
But obviously I was wrong.
I looked up, only to see that I was in front of their place. Time flies when you can’t shut your brain down, especially when there’s something really juicy and interesting on it.
Or, in this case, something really disappointing and heartbreaking.
I knocked on the door, reaching up to wipe the falling tears from my eyes the best that I could. But it didn’t work too well. They still poured down my cheeks like I had just seen someone die, like I had encountered all the pain in the world.
Like my heart had just been shattered and thrown on the ground, and when I tried to pick up the pieces, I realized that they were super glued to the floor and that they was no way in hell that I was getting them back anytime soon.
“Autumn!” SJ yelled as she opened the door, her long arms wrapping around my back as she pulled me against herself tightly. “Oh, thank God your okay.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” I tried to look presentable, but it wasn’t working very well.
I knew that from the look on her face.
“Don’t play games, Autumn,” She pulled me into the apartment and shut the door, the faces of eight interested faces staring at me. “I know you’re hurting.”
“I’m ready to go beat him for you,” Taylor said at that same time Nita said. “Can I whip him good?!”
“I stand by them,” Sarah mumbled into my ear, rubbing my back soothingly.
“I’m not a huge fighter, but I can get in some good words and hits if you ask me too.” Mari smiled slightly, trying to lighten the mood.
“Thanks,” I answered, rubbing my stomach lightly. “I know you guys mean well and thank you for caring about me so much. But I can’t ask that of you. I just, I don’t want that.”
“You could get back at him,” Johnny said, shrugging his shoulders and falling onto the couch beside Aron. “You know, give him his just deserts back.”
“You mean cheat on him?” Jay asked, his face brightening up as he stared at Johnny. “For once you’ve actually got a good idea George!”
“Well, thanks,” He grumbled, flipping him off as Jay looked up at us.
“You could do that. It would totally throw him off and you’d get him back. Give em a taste of his own medicine.” Jay grinned, rubbing his hands together as he laughed loudly. “I don’t think Dillon’s ever been cheated on before.”
“Jay,” Nita spat, smacking him upside the head as she tapped her foot against the floor roughly. “You’re so fucking stupid. That’s not even funny.”
“I can’t do that,” I said, shaking my head as I slowly massaged my stomach. “I love you guys and thank you for caring. Seriously, thank you. But, I just, I can’t. I still love him, and that’s not changing anytime soon. I don’t…I don’t want to hurt him.” I paused, reaching up to wipe my eyes as a steady stream of tears fell. “He hurt me so bad, but I can’t do that to him. I just can’t.”
“Aw, babe.” Sarah mumbled as she hugged my tightly, Nita, Taylor, and Mari following suite as I was wrapped up in a huge bear hug.
“Well, make me feel left out.” Charlie grumbled, rushing at our bodies as he wrapped his arms around us tightly, his right hand groping at Taylor’s breast. “Oops.”
“Oh, fuck yeah!” Johnny yelled over Taylor’s huffing sounds as he, Jay, Aron, and Matt cocooned our bodies in their tight, rugged embrace.
I still had my family.
Even if I had met them through him.