The Beast and The Brain.

“Jeremy?” I asked him confused.

He nodded his head, “Yes, you…had an accident. I brought you back here to make sure you were alright. We are friends. You really don’t remember?” He asked.

I shook my head, “The last thing I remember…” I bit my lower lip and pressed a hand against my skull. What did I remember? The last time I can recall was when the guards moved me to another cell in the prison. I sat down on one of the steps and looked at my clothes , But my clothes aren’t rags, and my body. I’m strong again… I looked up at the man called Jeremy.

“What happened? “ I asked him, “The last thing I remember was the prison, after that…” I shook my head, “It’s all dark.”

He came and sat next to me on the stairs, “You escaped.” He told me, “You turned into your Beast form and broke from the prison.” An image flashed through my head. I turned into my other form. I could hear the guard’s shouts of alarm as I jumped forward over the wall from the courtyard and took flight. Bolts from the crossbows shot after me, but I was free.

“I remember escaping.” I said to Jeremy.

He nodded his head satisfied, “After that you made your way to the mainland by boat.” He said slowly. I closed my eyes, yes; I remembered something about a boat. The storm raged around as the ship tipped violently. One of the masts had come free. I scrambled up the nets after a sailor and helped him tie the mast back into place. A wave crashed into the side of the ship and someone fell into the sea. I dove in after them.

I opened my eyes again and looked at Jeremy, “I saved someone’s life, they had fallen over board…”

Jeremy nodded, “Yes, that’s right. Then after you made it to land, you found refuge in a farmer’s home with his daughter. There you gained back your strength in a month or so.” He said.

“Yes.” I nodded. The images flashed through my mind. Grace touching me before I fell asleep each night, I worked the farm and gained back my old strength. “That’s why I’m so fit right now. She helped me.”

He nodded, “Yes, after that you bought a horse and came here.” I nodded my head, I stopped at a stable and bartered the man for his best wild stallion. The horse however liked me and allowed me to ride him. “Yes, the horse was wild when I bought him. Or so the man thought.”

Jeremy nodded, “Yes, good. Your memory has returned to you.”

I shook my head, “I don’t know…it feels like…as if I’m missing something.”

Jeremy looked me in eyes and a looked of astonishment was in his eyes, “Missing something?”

I nodded, “Yes, I feel like there is something big that I’m missing. Something I’ve overlooked or forgotten.”

Jeremy shook his head, “Unbelievable.”

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing.” He cleared his throat, “Well I hope you figure out, but for now shall we get something to eat?” He suggested.

I nodded my head, “Food sounds wonderful.”

~ ~ ~ ~

Three days passed and I spent my time with Jeremy in his home. My horse roamed the backyard, eating and resting under the trees. As the time passed in those three days, more of my memories triggered and came back in detail. However, the more my memories returned, the more I felt as though something were missing. There were gaps in my memory, conversations, or people I had met and things I had done that simply did not make sense. The past few days since coming to this city were nearly all blank memories. Jeremy was the only one I could remember. Besides him, everything was black.

I was brushing down my horse; the sun was setting and the clouds were all beautiful reds. Jeremy walked out of his house with a fresh pair of clothes and headed to the bathhouse. I laughed to myself and shook my head. “Nothing to laugh about.” Jeremy told me, “You cleaned that bathhouse it’s only fair that I use it.” He said opening the door.

I paused, “I cleaned it?” I asked to myself. I didn’t remember cleaning the bathhouse…

“Asher!” Jeremy called from inside.

“Yes?” I called back.

“Can..umm, can you start the fire for me?” I laughed aloud again, “Don’t laugh at me boy! I undressed and realized I forgot to start a fire!” I chuckled to myself, walked over to the woodpile, and pulled the logs from the stack. I started a fire.

“There you go Jeremy. It will heat up in a bit.”

“Thank you!” He called back. I stared into the flames of the fire, and something was itching in the back of my mind. Something I was forgetting. I had done this before. I know I had. I just couldn’t remember it. I closed my eyes, rubbed my temples, and talked to myself.

“Get a hold of yourself Asher; you’ve just been under a lot of stress.” It was true. Losing memories and then having them all come back in a short span of time was stressful and tiring. I was eating poor Jeremy out of house and home to keep my energy up. I sighed and I made sure the fire kept going for Jeremy, thirty minutes later I threw more logs in.

“That good?” I asked Jeremy.

“Did you say something?” He poked his head out of the door, and the steam from the bath poured out into the cool night. My brain flashed an image of a beautiful women stepping into the steam of the bathhouse but then it was gone. I stared straight ahead, trying to recall the image once more. Had that been a memory?

“You alright?” Jeremy asked.

“I…I don’t know. I just had another flash of a memory…I think, but this one didn’t stay…” I told him confused.

Jeremy shrugged, “The mind is a funny thing, and the water is hot. If you would like you can take a bath after me. No reason to waste warm water on one person.” He closed the door behind him. My body froze in place and my eyes dilated as that sentence played through my head, No reason to waste hard work and warm water on one person. The words echoed through my head, only they weren’t spoken by Jeremy, it was a women’s voice. Everything around me seemed to stop. My mind was working over time. A women’s voice and a women stepping into the steam, there was something I was missing. Who was she?

I slowly made my way back into the kitchen and stood in the doorway. A dirty rag sat on the counter. The rag… Another picture flashed through my head, A women was reaching for the window to clean it. My eyes traveled to her exposed skin on her back… I took a few shaky steps forward and used the wall as a support as I stepped into the living room. My head spun and my heart pounded in my ears, it was as if the work around me were in a fog. These memories…what were they? My brain pounded and my head hurt, it was as if my mind was fighting to show me, yet at the same time fighting to keep me from remembering.

I looked around the room, my eyes fell upon the tea set that Jeremy had been drinking from earlier. A picture of a teacup spilling onto the carpet flashed into my mind. I clutched my head and groaned, the pain grew each time the girl flashed in my mind. I stumbled out of the door, an urge to get away suddenly hit me and I ran. I wasn’t sure where I was headed, but my legs took me down the streets. People coming out of a tavern yelled out angrily as I pushed past them, but I ignored their protests and ran.

Then, I found myself in a garden, a public garden. The flower bushes were bare from the cool weather. There was a single bench under a tree and I went to sit down. I leaned against the trunk of the tree and took a deep breath of fresh air. For a moment, my mind was at peace, but only a moment.

As I looked around, another thing nagged at my mind, I recognized this place. I stood up and examined the garden, and then stared at the bench. I did recognize it. I closed my eyes, and the biggest memory yet came to me. It was the most excruciating pain I had ever been in; my brain felt as if it was going to burst from my skull, my ears rung so loud that it felt like someone were driving a stick into my eardrums. I fell to my knees and grasped my head. Somehow, I knew that if I chose I could stop the pain, but I also knew that if I let the pain go, then I was letting the memory go as well. So I pressed on, I willed the memory to come back to me, and come it did.

A beautiful woman looked me in the eyes, her mouth was moving and she was speaking to me, yet I could not hear her words. She and I were sitting on the bench under the tree in the public garden. Then her words came to me, “…let us simply be friends. Can we do that?”

I yelled out in pain, opened my arms to the sky, and yelled with all my heart and lungs. As I yelled a part of my Beast side took over, my vocal cords changed, and my yelling turned into a terrifying roar of an animal. As the last of the air left my lungs, I slammed my fists into the earth before me and hit my head against the grass. The pain I was feeling was unlike any physical pain I had ever been in, I couldn’t fight, or ignore it, it was the pain of emotion and feeling. “J!” I yelled at the earth, “J!” I remembered her. How could I ever forget her?

All the gaps in my memories began to fill and were replaced with J. Each time a hot searing pain like liquid fire racked my body, but I wanted all of the memories, I wanted all of them back. “How could I forget you my friend?” Tears of pain poured from my face as all of my memories returned. All but one, there was no accident in my mind. I remembered everything up until the moment J returned to Jeremy’s house after I took my bath. It was black, there was still one memory missing. What was it?

My head swam and pounded, my muscles ached, this particular memory was resisting more than the others were, yet it was not resisting with pain like the others had. Instead, a feeling of guilt washed over me, I felt dirty from it. As if, I had done something terrible. Yet my curiosity got the best of me, I needed to know what was missing. I needed it all back.

Then the memory gave in, and it filled my head like a stampede of horses. The grimy feeling of betrayal washed over me and I was stunned in silence as the memory played through my mind. I recalled it again, and again to make sure it was a real memory. It had really happened. The very thing I had been warned about. “Good bye my friend.” Her words echoed through my head like a million needle pricks…J had betrayed me.