Worry Rock

You Just Don't Touch Blue

---Charlie's POV---

"You're moving?" I ask him in disbelief.
"Yeah. I'm moving."
"Are you serious?"
"Yes, alright, I'm buying a house about fifteen minutes away from here. It's not like I'm moving to China or something." Joey turns to look at me. "I'll still come around a bunch. I'll just be sleeping there."
"Are you sure it's not my fault?" I ask.
"Maybe it's because I'm twenty one years old and still living with my parents, okay?"
I stay silent; I can't help but think maybe it's my fault that Joey's leaving. Moving out. I've never thought about it before; you know, Joey being all grown up, in his own house... even though he's older than me, it always seemed like he'd just be little Joey. I guess not.
I get up, walking over to where Jake and the guys are sitting.
"I miss Jenny," Jakob says again.
"You just saw her this morning!" I say, aggravated.
"But now she's at work, and I miss her."
"We know," I say.
"Maybe I should move in with her."
"Oh, Jake, not you too."
"Well you can't expect me to be living with my parents forever."
"But you're living with me too. I'm your best friend."
"Charlie," Boom cuts in. "Why are you getting so upset about this? If Jake wants to go live with his girlfriend, that's his business. Stop stressing about it."
"Well if he's moving out, that means I have to move out too."
"No, it doesn't," says Jake. "You know my parents wouldn't mind."
I look at him like he's an idiot. Which he is. "Jakob, do you even know your parents? After you and Joey are gone, it would basically be like having an adjoining room to their fucking honeymoon suite. I'd be scarred for life."
"I have a feeling this is about more than that," says Jakob. "You miss Joey."
"How could I miss Joey?" I ask. "He's right over there. It's not like he's even left yet."
"Admit it. You miss him. You're upset because he's leaving," Boom says.
"No, I'm upset because I'm being left here with Horny and Hornier."
"You blinked!" Ah, Mick. He and Warren are playing that staring game again.
"No I didn't!"
"Yeah you did!"
They sigh, and in unison roshambo for the winner, who in this case is Mick. As usual, he yells out in triumph.
"Fine," says Boom, ignoring the dynamic duo. "You move out too. It's not like you don't have the money for a house or anything."
"I don't want to live alone."
"Okay, well me and the twins are getting a new house too, complete with our band floor, so come live with us."
"I'm kinda scared of living with Mick."
"Stop being difficult."
"Well I am."
"Okay, here's the deal," say Jake. "Ashlynn's coming over again later, and she's been thinking of moving out of her mom's house. Ask her."
I sigh. "Yeah, I guess I will."
"Bye," I hear Billie say behind me.
"Where you going?" I ask.
"Dad's coming with me to talk with the real estate company," Joey explains.
"I can't believe you're buying your first house," says Billie, ruffling Joey's hair. Joe, in response, does the customary leaning away, self conciously touching his hair.
"Yeah," he says in annoyance at everybody making such a big deal of it.
"Bye, everyone!" says Billie, putting a fatherly arm around Joey's shoulder and leading him out of the door. I guess parents can never pass up the chance to embarrass their kids. Famous rockstar or not, to Joey and Jakob, Billie will always just be Dad.

***

"Hola, Worry Rock crew!"
"Hey, Ashtray!" we all greet her.
"Ashlynn," I whine, "I need to move out. Can I move with you?"
"You want to move out? Why?" she asks as if I'm stupid.
"Okay, well, Joey randomly decided to move out right after I broke up with him, and now Jakob wants to move in with Jenny, and so I need to move out too."
"Why?"
"Because living here once Jake and Joe are gone is like having an adjoining room to Billie and Adrienne's honeymoon suite. I'd rather not be scarred for life."
"You wouldn't be scarred for life. Sure, Billie is fourty four years old, but he's still sexy."
"Ew," I say.
"Yeah," Jake agrees with me.
"Well, she's kind of right," says Mick as Warren chuckles.
This whole time, Boom is dead silent.
"See? Mick's honest!" says Ash.
"Okay, next subject!" Jakob says uncomfortably.
"Yeah, conversation over! Can I move in with you or not?"
"Of course!" she says. "That would be awesome."
"But yeah, one condition."
"What?"
"Don't ever talk about how you think Billie Joe is attractive around me again, okay?"
"Oh, please, you know he is," she teases.
"Just shut up now," Jake says.
"Fine, I'll shut up. Can I talk about Billie when he was little though? He was so cute."
"Whoa," I say. "How do you even know anyhing about that? We don't even know anything about little Billie."
"I have my ways. So wait, that means you've never heard Look For Love?"
"Yeah, as if he'd let us!" Jake says.
"Wanna hear it?"
"Okay," we say. We get to hear five year old Billie Joe? One word: blackmail.
Moments later, we hear the voice of a five year old singing.
"One two three four five six seven! Look for love..."
Oh yes. Major blackmail. You see, Billie hates being teased about when he acts cute, whether it's about him as a kid, or his songs about Adie (which he plays off as unembarrassed, but we know he's still self concious about those).
Well, anyways, once the adorably cute song is over, and we all hear the final "Look for love!" we start laughing. And laughing. And laughing more. I think the laughter is more at the prospect of teasing our resident legend about the very, very early days of his career.
And when we're done laughing, we talk about that very thing. After a while, we progress on to a bit further in Billie's life. "So have you ever actually touched Blue?" Ashlynn asks us eagerly.
Jakob laughs. He always did find it amusing how Ash practically worships his dad. Maybe literally. He's met fans before, but apparently, Ash is his favorite. Ever. "Yeah, he lets us touch it, sometimes. Pick it up and you die though."
"Well duh, it's the fucking Holy Grail of all guitars!" More laughing. Such a laughter-filled day, right? "Well, it is!" I just grin at her. You know you have it bad when you worship a guitar. "Can I touch it then?"
"Are you serious?" I ask. "We just told you he rarely lets us touch it."
"But God's not here right now," she counters. "Please? Please, please, please?"
I glance over to Jakob. You see, to us, Blue isn't a holy object or anything like that. It's his dad's prized possession. You know, the one he doesn't like people messing with. It's different for different people. It could be a trophy, an autograph, an old picture, anything. And when you're a kid, you love to sneak in and touch it, just to be rebellious. But then you get older, and it's not quite as much fun anymore. Well, not as much.
"Fine," answers Jakob, cueing a high pitched "Yay!" from Ash, who lunges forward, planting a kiss on the cheek of one very surprised looking Jakob. "Woah," he says, touching his cheek as she pulls away. "Maybe I should let you worship my dad more often," he jokes, laughing slightly.
"Yeah," Ash replies. "Maybe you should."
"Oh, please, no!" I say. "More worshipping of Billie is the last thing we need!"
Jakob laughs, and Mick jumps into the conversation. "Hey, I'm letting you worship his dad! You can worship his dad all you want. Do I get a kiss too?"
"No," she laughs.
"Oooh, harsh," says the twin of the drummer.
"Yeah, that was cold!" concurs Mick.
"Yup," she says. "Now let's go touch Blue." We laugh again, and moments later, we've snuck up to Billie and Adie's room. "What are we doing?"
"Billie keeps the room with Blue in it locked," explains Boom. "We need the key."
"Oh."
"Don't worry, we know where Billie hides his stuff," I tell her as Jakob drops to the floor.
"You see," he says, laying on his back and using his arms to pull himself underneath the bed. "Most people hide their keys, porno magazines and DVDs, and other private items inbetween their matresses, but," we hear a grunt as he pulls himself back out and gets into a sitting position. "My dad decided to be original and hide it inside the box spring." He holds up a small key to us as if to prove his point.
Ash laughs. "Nice. What kind of stuff does he have under there?"
"You don't want to know," answers Jake truthfully. Believe me, you don't want to know what's hiding under Billie Joe Armstrong's bed.
"What are you guys doing?" we hear and turn to see who else but Adrienne Armstrong.
"Um," Jake says, obviously trying to think up an excuse.
"Are you going to sneak in to touch Blue again?" Well, it's not like she's psychic or anything. Jakob was sitting there holding the key to Blue's holding cell.
"Yes," he says. "Ash never got to touch it."
"You know Billie doesn't like that."
"Oh, cut the crap, Adrienne, you know you want to touch it too," butts in Mick. Adie tries to glare at him, but obviously can't resist a small grin. "I mean, Mrs. Armstrong, ma'am?"
Adie laughs. "Come on, Adie," I say. "You know you can't be strict like that. You're not programmed that way."
"And you love us too much," says Warren.
"Yeah, that too," I say.
"We love you, Mom!" Well, you can guess who said that one. We all take the cue and pull Adie into a group hug. Well, me, Jake, and the twins anyways. I think Ashlynn got in on it too, but that's just because Adrienne Armstrong is also one of her idols. Nowhere near her husband's status with the whole "Sign me, you're God!" thing, but she loves Adie. It's easier for Ash to act normal around her anyways. Well, as normal as she can. I'm starting to get the picture that Ashlynn is NOT a normal person, around us or not. That's probably why Jakob likes her so much.
"Good job kissing her ass, guys," says Boom with a smirk, standing off to the side.
"Shut up," I tell him.
"So, Adie, since you are such a wonderful person, may we please sneak behind the back of your rock god husband to touch the Holy Grail of guitars, thus making my life officially complete?" asks Ashlynn. Of course.
But apparently, it works, since Adie just laughs. "Yeah, go on," she says. "I can't say no to you all. Just don't break it or anything. You know how Billie is about that guitar."
"Yeah, Adie, we know," I say.
"Yeah, we're not ten years old anymore," adds Jakob.
"Well, it's a mom thing. I have to tell you or I'll be a nervous wreck until you get out of the room, it's locked up, and the key is hidden back in the box spring, exactly where it was before."
"You know about Dad's hiding spot?"
"Please. You think he gets away with anything without me knowing? I only let him think he does. Don't tell him I know."
"Sure, but what other secrets does Billie have?" I ask, my curiosity getting the better of me.
Adrienne simply smiles knowingly. "If you haven't already figured them out, I'm not going to be the one to tell you. Don't worry, he doesn't really have any big skeletons in his closet."
"Ah," says Warren, "But it's the small ones that are the interesting ones. I mean, what's freakier, a guy who puts old people out of their misery of oldness or a guy who kills babies?"
"Okay, well he doesn't have any baby skeletons in his closet. In fact, all of his skeletons are rats. There. He has rodent skeletons. Are you happy?"
"That's not quite so interesting," says Warren.
"Exactly. Now, I want everything back how it was in twenty minutes."
"Yes, ma'am!" say Mick and Warren in unison, saluting her before we all take off running to Billie's treasure trove. Yes, even Boom. Mr. Calm still looks at his experiences with Blue as something exciting.
So we get to the door. Jakob has some fun torturing Ashlynn by turning the key especially slow. And then the door opens.
Ash's face is pretty damn priceless, I must say. You see, in this room, Billie not only keeps Blue, but a few random awards, some old pictures, and things like that. Some people have photo albums. Billie gets an entire room.
So, anyways, Ashlynn. She's stopped dead, staring at the old guitar in front of her in awe. "Oh my Billie... it's Blue."
"Yeah, it's Blue," says Boom, staring at the guitar as well with a small smile on his face.
"Yup," says Mick, karumphing into the room with his brother. It's what we've nicknamed his new, strange way of walking which is somehere inbetween walking and skipping. We used the word 'karumphing' because we didn't really know what it meant or if it was a real word, but we knew it sounded funny. Anyways, the rest of us follow them in, Ash still mesmerized.
And I am getting a really bad idea.
"Oh no, Charlie, I know that look. What are you going to do?" Jakob asks me as Boom and Ash go up to Blue and the twins start looking around the room. I just smirk at him and look back over to where Boom and Ash are. Ash just put her arm out, letting out a squeal when she touched the guitar. I chuckle, but Jake hasn't forgotten about me. "We're going to get in trouble again, aren't we, Char?"
In case you haven't guessed it, I've gotten Jakob and myself in trouble a lot before. He's the pacifist who would be more likely to get beat up than beat somebody up, not because he can't, but because he doesn't like hurting people. I'm the mischevious one who often ends up kicking a few asses or getting mine kicked. Or getting both of ours kicked, in situations like this. That's just how it is.
"Charlie? Oh, come on, whatever is in your demented little head, don't do it." I ignore him, walking towards the faded guitar with a determined look on my face. "We're gonna die," he sighs, following me.
"Don't be so dramatic, Jake. Nothing's going to happen."
He turns to Ash. "That's what she always says, right before Dad throws us into the neighbor's yard to run away from that demented Chihuahua named Taco."
"Taco died two years ago," I say, rolling my eyes.
"Oh yeah, now they have a Doberman," he says.
"Relax. Your dad wouldn't throw us in with a Dobey."
"He would if you broke anything in this room."
"I'm not breaking anything. Damn, Jake, you need to loosen up." With that, I turn away and with a quick movement have the guitar strap around my shoulder, Blue hanging loosely. It's too long, Billie being a few inches taller than me, but I'm not about to give him a clue that I played his guitar.
"You're holding Blue!" says Ash.
"Yes, I am," I answer. "What's more, I'm gonna play it." I say, plugging it into the small amp located in the room.
"We are really so fucking dead."
"You know, Jake, this would be so much more fun if you weren't such a worry wart."
"Somebody's gotta keep you from burning down the neighborhood."
"That's why I love ya, Jakey. You keep me out of the big house."
"Not that you ever listen to me."
"Right. Boom, One Of My Lies. Sing along," I order, and he laughs. "No, seriously, come on. One, two, three four."
And our personal closet Green Day fanatic, of course knowing the words to this good old Green Day song, begins to sing along. Is it strange that, even though I've known him for years, I'm still impressed every time he opens his mouth to sing? I hope it's not just me.
Mick's pulled out a random pair of drumsticks now, which he apparently keeps on him at all times. Yeah, he's our little drummer boy, sitting there with his beat up old drumsticks and tapping lightly on the amp in front of him.
"Why does my life have to be so small, yet death is forever? And does-"
"Shit!" Shit is right. Because I just broke a guitar string.
"I knew we were going to get caught," sighs Jakob.
"No, we're not," I say. "We just change the guitar string. He'll never know."
"Dad notices everything."
"Hes not that fucking observant, Jakob. Somebody get me a new E string."
"I'll go get one," volunteers Warren, standing up to leave. He seems to have been quite bored with our little sing-along.
"Okay, you see? We'll be fine. Billie won't even notice."
"Notice what?" I hear in the doorway, and we all look up to see Adie. "Oh, Charlie, you know you're not supposed to actually play the guitar. Only Billie can do that."
"That's what I told her!" says Jake.
"No, you just thought we'd die," corrects Mick.
"Shut up."
Warren comes back, handing me the string, and I quickly change it out, putting everything back where it was. Once I'm done with that, I turn to Ash and hand her the broken guitar string. "Here you go. An offering for your shrine," I say with a smirk.
She takes the string, looking down at it then back up at me. "I love you," she says, making me laugh. "No, really. I fucking worship you."
I laugh more. "Ash, who do you not worship?"
"I don't worship Micheal Jackson."
"Who do you not worship who I know personally?"
"I don't worship Demon," she says with a grin, mentioning the cat which used to be mine, until a certain female coowner of Adeline with black and blonde dreads stole him... not mentioning any names though. I just smile, rolling my eyes at the girl in front of me and walk away.

***

"How'd it go?" I ask a very tired looking Joseph as he flops down next to me on the couch. He groans.
"Bad. First, the guy we had to meet was late. Like, half an hour late. So after expressing exactly how pissed he was, Dad suggested we get down to what we went for. The guy gives us this absolutely ridiculous price to haggle with. So we tell him we're not going for it, and this asshole starts telling us how the house is ancient, like an antique or something with a bunch of architectural crap and a nice garden or whatever. Apparently, he didn't understand the fact that I was going to actually live in it, not set up a museum in it dedicated to fucking World War I. Asshole."
"Damn. So I guess Billie's in a bad mood then, huh?"
"Fuck yeah, he's pissed. He said he was going up to his room to cool off."
"His bedroom or his Blue room?" I ask tentatively. Please say bedroom. Please.
"Blue room. Just like every time he pissed." He looks at me. "Why?"
"Um."
"Oh, Charlie, you didn't."
I don't have to answer him, because an enraged yell comes from upstairs. "Who touched Blue!?"
Joey gives me that amused "You dumbass" look, and I grin sheepishly.
"I'm driving!" Jakob says as he runs in from the other room, keys in hand, with Ash, Boom, and the twins following him.
"Bye, Joe!" I say and run after the herd of people not wanting to face the already pissed Billie Joe. Can you blame us? "So where are we going?" I ask as I jump into the back of Jakob's hearse.
The irony is definitely not lost on me.
"To eat. I'm hungry."
A few minutes later, the vehicle is parked outside of the ever so popular Cafe Intermezzo, always filled with crowds of college kids from Berkeley, home of the amazing salads, sandwiches, and various other health foods, workplace of Jakob's girlfriend. Of course.
"Jake, you are pathetic, you know that?"
He just smiles at me before locking the car up. "Yeah, I know." He turns around, leaving the rest of us to follow him in.
Surprisingly, the place isn't teeming with a million students at the moment. Which is good. Yeah, lately, I've been developing somewhat of a claustrophobia. I think we all have. Just one of those things that comes from being in a successful band, I guess. You eventually miss not being noticed and welcome the absence of crowds.
"Jakob?" we hear an astonished voice saying shortly after we're seated.
"Oh, hey, Jen! What are you doing here?" he asks the girl in the apron pleasantly.
"I work here. You know that. What are you doing here?" She's gotten to the table now, leaning down on it and looking at Jake somewhat angrily.
"You work here? I didn't know. I was just coming for that great salad with the poppy seed dressing everybody loves so much."
"Jakob, you know if my boss sees you here, he'll think I'm not doing my job? Which could lead to complications? Which could mean I'd have to move in with my mother again?"
"You won't, because I want to move in with you," he says with a smile.
"Huh?"
"I'll explain later," he says. "Wanna get me a sandwich?"
She sighs. "I'm not the waitress, but fine. Tell me what you want."
We all give her our orders, and she walks off.
"Are you happy now, Jake?" I ask. "You saw your girlfriend for two minutes."
"And in exactly," -he looks at his watch- "43 minutes, I get to see her again when we bring her back home."
I don't know anymore whether to call it cute or jut wierd at my friend being such a lovesick little puppy.
"You're hopeless," I say.
"Yes, I am," he answers with a grin.

***

We came. We ate. We got Jennifer. We left.
Then we dropped everyone off until the car was empty except for me and him, and it's into hell we now go. Otherwise known as home. Unless Adrienne has somehow calmed Billie down into a slightly annoyed state. Or just clubbed him in the head with a baseball bat. But that may not be fun, seeing as we really have no place to hide the body.
Anyways, we're home. Cue thunder and horror movie music. As we walk in the door, we see that the living room is actually quite vacant, except for Joey, who is in the same spot as earlier, watching TV. He looks up as we walk in, smirking.
"You're in trouble," he said simply.
"What else's new?" Jake asks. "This is Charlie we're talking about."
"Hey!" I punch him in the arm and am pleased to have earned an "Ow!" from it.
Well, maybe not since that clued Billie in to us being here. He comes running down the stairs, stopping at the bottom. "You and you are under house arrest. No leaving for a week."
"Oh, come on, Billie, that's not fair. It's just a guitar string."
"Charlie, aren't a lot of things I tell you not to do, and one is that you never, ever play that guitar!"
"Exactly!" I reason. "If you told us not to do more things, we'd violate the less serious rules instead."
"How about you not fuckin violate any rules? It can't be that fuckin hard!"
"This, coming from Billie Joe Armstrong? The man arrested for a DUI, indecent exposure, and other things, who trashed a record store, who jacked off in front of 65,000 people or something ridiculous like that, who - "
"I get the fucking point already! Do as I say, not as I do!"
"Cuz this shit's so deep you can't run away."
"Shut the hell up, and yeah, exactly like that. You're stuck here for a week." He sighs. "I'm going to bed." With that, Billie turns around, going back up the stairs.
"Well, that wasn't so bad," Jake says.
"Yeah, but now we can't have band practice for a week, being under house arrest. And you can't see Jennifer."
"This is gonna be a long week," he says, running his hand through his hair.
Joey laughs. "Good thing I wasn't here, right? Then I'd be stuck too."
"Shut the fuck up, Joseph," I tease. He pretends to cringe before announcing his going to bed and doing so.
We notice Adrienne standing by the stairs now, having just come down. "House arrest for a week, eh?"
"Yeah. Not as bad as the time we attacked the Santa in the store with the water gun though. It was Charlie's idea, but I still got my iPod taken away and thrown in with Taco."
"You were thirteen. You were supposed to be past the stage of even caring."
"Yeah, well we wanted to see if he would break character and run after us... he did."
Adie laughs. "You two are impossible."
"Yep."
"Well, I'm hungry," she says, starting towards the kitchen.
"Hey, wait a second, Mom. Why didn't you get punished?"
"I did," she says, looking quite unhappy.
"Well what is it?" I ask. She mumbles something incomprehensible to us. "Speak up, Adie!"
"No sex for a week!" she almost yells before walking very quickly into the kitchen.
Causing us to burst out laughing.
But really, when you seriously think about it, this is going to be a very, very long week.