This Is Not an After School Special

I survived my first choir performance in front of the student body. Josh and I celebrated afterwards by going to a party. This time, neither of us knew the kid who was throwing it. In fact, we hardly knew anyone in the room at all. Matt didn't show up, though I'd mentioned it to him earlier. He was hanging out with Josh's friend Chris, who I'd introduced him to a few weeks before.

I was kind of glad that Matt had another mutual friend with Josh and I now. It was easier to hang out as a group now that Matt and Chris were getting along so well. It also made me feel a little less guilty about ditching Matt for Josh so often.

Josh brought me a new drink before I'd even finished my other one. I gave him a grin.

"My my, if I didn't know any better, I'd swear you were trying to get me drunk."

He placed a hand flat against his chest, feigning innocence. "Me? Now why would I do something like that? It's not like I couldn't get anything I want from you when you're sober."

I downed the rest of my first drink so that I could dispose of the cup and take the fresh one from Josh. "You sound pretty sure of yourself."

He leaned in close to me, and I could feel my breath get caught somewhere in my chest. His breath tickled my lips, and I was itching to close the gap between us.

"Are you saying that you wouldn't give in to anything I asked of you right now?" He murmured gently.

"But I'm not totally sober." I meant to sound argumentative, but my voice came out weak.

"But you're not totally drunk, either."

I lifted the plastic cup in my hand. "We can fix that."

"Good plan," he straightened up. "Do you see anybody that you know here?"

I looked around the room once again. There were still no familiar faces. In fact, nobody looked exceptionally friendly, in my opinion. If Josh weren't with me, I would have left long ago. I felt very out of place here.

"Nope. You?"

He shook his head. "No. Not yet, at least. Let's make a plan. If we still don't know anyone in half an hour, we'll go find something else to do."

"Works for me. What else do you feel like doing?"

"We'll figure it out as we go. Drink up. If we're leaving in half an hour, we might as well have a few drinks before we go."

I took a sip, then made a sour face. "What's in this one?"

He took the cup from my hand and tasted the liquid inside. "Oops. That one's mine. Here, you'll like this one better," he offered me the plastic cup that he'd been holding in his other hand. I accepted it and drank it hesitantly. It tasted better.

"What was in the first one?" I asked, gazing curiously at the cup.

"Rye. Apparently, you're not a fan."

"Apparently not."

Josh was searching for someone in the crowd. I didn't know how he could tell one person from another; they were all just blending into the crowd to me. I tried to follow his line of vision, but nearly everyone had their backs to us. How were we supposed to find someone we knew here?

The next half hour went by quickly. We both gave up on finding any other friends, and we just sat and talked about the choir performance that day. Josh had had a solo, which he pulled off flawlessly. I, on the other hand, was happy to be a single voice among many, undistinguishable to the crowd.

"Look at the time," Josh said suddenly, looking at a clock hanging on the wall. "I'm just going to run to the bathroom before we go, then we'll get out of here."

I watched as he darted away from me, making his way through the crowd. My mind was working a bit slower than usual, but that didn't prevent me from noticing that he'd gone in the wrong direction. The bathroom was somewhere behind me, and he was walking toward the opposite side of the room. I pushed the thought from my mind. He was only gone for a few brief moments before he seemed to realise his mistake. He flashed me a somewhat embarassed smile as he made his way past me. I couldn't stop myself from laughing at him.

When he returned, he gave me an apologetic look. "Sorry, there was a long line."

"That's okay. I had a good time chatting up this plant," I jerked a thumb toward a small potted cactus on a table beside me. "Not much of a talker. Kind of boring, actually."

"Let's get you out of here, then."

"Works for me!" I leapt to my feet and followed him out of the house. As soon as the pounding music was behind us, I could really start to feel the effects of all that I'd just drank. The ground dipped beneath my feet suddenly, and Josh caught me as I stumbled. "Thanks," I grinned at him.

His lips pulled into a crooked, amused smirk as he planted me firmly on my feet. "I was going to ask you to come back to my place, but now I feel like I'd just be taking advantage."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "I'm perfectly capable of making rational decisions, thank you very much."

"And I can thank Matt for telling me last time about the way you try to sound smart when you're drunk. Now I know for sure that you're wasted."

"Stupid Matt. He's got to go and ruin things for me, doesn't he?" I grumbled.

"He just knows you too well. He's got the inside scoop on all of your secrets."

"Even so, he doesn't have to give away everything. Maybe I wanted to go back to your place tonight. Why can't I just because I'm a little tipsy? You're not totally sober, either," I pointed an accusing finger toward his chest.

"Well I have to stop by my place before we do anything else anyways, so I guess we can just stay there if you really want to," he caught my hand and let it fall back down by my side.

"You make it sound like a chore. Maybe I don't want to anymore."

He laughed at my stubborn demeanor. "It's kind of your call at this point. But I really do need to go home for a minute."

"Why?"

"Why are you suddenly so full of questions?" He countered. "You usually just let it go."

"Fine," I pouted a bit. "Let's just go to your place and do whatever you need to do. Then, I think it's time that you came over to my place."

Josh looked suddenly intrigued. "You've never asked me to come over like this before."

"There's a first time for everything, isn't there? Besides, what makes your room so much better than mine?"

"Nothing, I guess. It's just different for us, that's all."

"And since when is different synonymous with bad?"

He chuckled. "It's not. Fine, have it your way. But we need to go this way," he grabbed me by the shoulders and steered me in a new direction. "To get to my house."

"Right," I nodded. "I knew that."

"Of course you did."

I shivered suddenly and pulled my hoodie tighter around me. Suddenly, I realised just how late in the year it was. November had gone by so quickly that I hadn't noticed until just now that December was only a few days away.

"What day is your sister's wedding again?" I asked, trying to remember the date he'd told me so long ago.

"It's in three weeks. Why?"

"Just wondering."

"You're still going to be my date, right? I don't want to be there alone."

I laughed at the panic in his voice. "I'll be there. But it's your family; why don't you want to be there without me?"

"I don't want to be anywhere without you," he responded simply. His voice was light and teasing, but I somehow felt like he was hiding something.

How often did I feel that way about him? The thought troubled me more than it did when I was sober. I found myself focusing so intently on the mystery that so often went hand-in-hand with my boyfriend that I walked right past his house.

"Becky! Where are you going?" He called out in a hiss.

I turned back to him, unable to wipe my face clean of the confused expression that it held. "Huh?"

"Wait there," he directed me. "I'll be right back."

As he slipped silently in the front door, I saw his hand plunge into the front pocket of his jeans. I noticed an irregular bulge there. Why hadn't I seen it before? He hadn't had something that bulky in his pocket the whole night, had he? Surely I would have noticed it if he'd had it before I'd gotten drunk. But I couldn't be sure. For all I knew, it could have been a small bottle of liquor that he'd stolen from the party.

I sat down on the curb in front of his house, but I wasn't there for long. Josh was back in only a minute or two, and we continued on our way.

"Do you have to sneak back out in the morning like I always do?" I asked.

"Probably."

"That sucks. I mean, you have lots of guy friends. Wouldn't your parents believe you if you said you had too much to drink and crashed on one of their couches?"

"Yeah, they probably would. But would your parents like it if they went into your room and found me there?"

"Touche."

This time, I led Josh through the dark house to my bedroom. Unlike him, I wasn't silent or graceful. I ran into a wall at one point, nearly fell on my face when I went to reach for my doorknob and found that the door was already wide open.

"Way to keep a low profile," Josh murmured lowly.

"If I didn't make some kind of noise, they would think I never came home. Then they would come looking for me. Do you want that to happen?"

"Maybe you should trip again, just to be safe."

I stuck my tongue out at him, then dove into my bed. I was suddenly extremely tired. I felt the mattress shift as Josh crawled in beside me. He seemed to read my sudden change in energy, and gently wrapped his arms around me. I curled up against him as he began to hum an unfamiliar tune. Whatever the song was, it was comforting. I felt my eyelids triple in weight as they slid down over my irises.

"Night," I whispered to him.

He didn't stop humming to reply. I was unconscious in record time, and the strange, intoxicationg song clouded my mind and took over all of my dreams. The confusion I'd felt about Josh earlier no longer mattered. All that I cared about was the way that he cradled me against him, and the way that, no matter what he did, there was nothing that could beat what I was feeling when we were together like this.