The Walls Caved In

I sat up in bed, pushing my hair out of my face with both hands. I reached to the left side of my bed, fumbling for a minute in the dark before turning my lamp on. I shielded my eyes for a moment as to become adjusted to the transition from dark to light, before looking at the clock.

The loud sigh fell from my lips before I could stop it. It was only a few minutes after two. And I had thought I had actually made it past three this morning. Ha, what was I thinking.

The point was, my sleeping patterns were way off since Sunday evening. I blamed it on the guilt. I could have easily removed the pain from my shoulders at any time, but I did not. Stupid me.

Honestly, though, how was I supposed to approach this situation? Sit down with my mother right after she got home from work, when she was cranky and exhausted, her eyes twitching shut every few seconds. Explain to her that the friend I had went out only a few days ago was indeed, a good friend of mine. A new friend, but a good one. Oh, and that this friend was a boy. That he had quickly dug a way into my life, and seemed to like it there? Oh, and did I forget? He's kind of my new boyfriend, too.

Yea, that would go over so well. I shook my head, running my hand through my hair. I yawned, the noise sounding so exhausted to my ears. I needed some sleep. I flipped my comforter off of my body, and my legs were pale against my dark sheets. I fumbled at the foot of the bed, pulling my sheets up from where I had pushed them in my little amount of sleep.

Turning on my side, I extended my hand to switch off the light.

Yea. if only it were that easy. I told myself, attempting to become comfortable enough to get a few more hours of sleep.