Broken Glass & Hidden Dreams
Thursday, May 7th, 2009
The past was the past, or at least that's what I kept telling myself.
She was gone, dead, like dissipated cigarette smoke on a foggy night, and no matter how much effort I put forth, she was going to remain that way. I searched the entire world for a cure to her death, but there was none.
Devastated.
Hopeless.
Distraught.
Dead in every sense of the word.
How was I to cure my own death?
Sleep was the only answer I could find. To separate myself from the world. Hide from these haunting ghosts. Run away from the demons that wear her face.
I was breaking, crumbling to pieces like Caesar's empire after Christ's crucifixion, for the whole world to see. If I didn't act soon, something far worse than my ability to comprehend was going to happen.
And so... I slept.
Slept and slept and slept and slept and slept.
Slept for years.
Slept through the many ages of the Earth.
Slept until my memories of the past were only shadows in the night, hidden monsters in the dark. I could barely see them, barely believe they were there.
and then...
I awoke.
The first thing I noticed upon awakening before the stiffness of my muscles, before the new architecture of this new world, before the new fashions and music was my undeniable, burning thirst. I hadn't fed in years, and now that hunger consumed my every want, desire, and need. I could feel it in my veins, burning for blood.
There was no time to think, only to act. When finished, when I had consumed until I was full, until my thirst had mortals throughout the entirely of Paris had been drained.
There was not a tinge of guilt in my body as there may once have been long ago. I was alive, more alive than I had ever felt. And young. I felt so young, like a prince ready to take on life as a whole.
With a smile drawn on my face and a bright ambition in my eyes, I stepped out into the city to face life once more.
Business opportunities flocked to me from every direction, and I accepted all that were made. Money began to flow into my pocket like rushing water through a breaking dam.
Soon, sooner that I would ever have expected, I was richer than even the noblemen in Paris. And oh, how I spent the money I had acquired. I bough mansion upon mansion and all the finest furnishings to go in them. And, of course, I treated myself to the nicest apparel of the new age.
I made many mortal friends and fed without a care. Before long, I was extremely liked among all those who took up residency in Paris.
Parties were the main event of my new life. Hundreds of people were in attendance.
All the parties and all the people blurred together in my mind. It was difficult to distinguish one from the other.
There was one, however, that stands out vividly in my mind, even today.
The night was pristine, clear, and beautiful. The stars overhead could be seen twinkling like an in love girl's eyes.
I found solace in the shadows of the terrace, watching the hopeless mortals having a gay time sipping their champagne and whispering of ghosts. I saw their curious, wandering eyes clearly. It amused me how insignificant they all were.
As I was caught up in a daze, thinking briefly of far off things, my senses twinged as they hadn't done in years.
This feeling, this knowing, was impossible to forget. It was the acute awareness that there was another of my kind near.
I waited. I knew whomever it was would also be able to feel my presence. I would let them come to me.
It felt as if time had slowed while I waited. I continued to vaguely pay attention to the mortals whom surrounded me on the terrace, although each and every one of them were oblivious to my presence.
The crowd of mortals spilled out of the exit which opened to the terrace, and finally, I saw him. He moved through the crowd in a very sultry and cat-like fashion, in only a way that one of our kind could.
There are not words to accurately describe how he looked that night, how he still looks.
He was beautiful in every single definition of the word. Charming. Alluring. Seductive.
His eyes were like black coals, burning into mine through the blur of mortals. His skin as white as marble, his features chiseled with great precision out of marble.
The feeling that surged through my body like an electric current was one I had never before felt, not even for her.
I thirsted for him, hungered for him like no other.
I had to have him.
She was gone, dead, like dissipated cigarette smoke on a foggy night, and no matter how much effort I put forth, she was going to remain that way. I searched the entire world for a cure to her death, but there was none.
Devastated.
Hopeless.
Distraught.
Dead in every sense of the word.
How was I to cure my own death?
Sleep was the only answer I could find. To separate myself from the world. Hide from these haunting ghosts. Run away from the demons that wear her face.
I was breaking, crumbling to pieces like Caesar's empire after Christ's crucifixion, for the whole world to see. If I didn't act soon, something far worse than my ability to comprehend was going to happen.
And so... I slept.
Slept and slept and slept and slept and slept.
Slept for years.
Slept through the many ages of the Earth.
Slept until my memories of the past were only shadows in the night, hidden monsters in the dark. I could barely see them, barely believe they were there.
and then...
I awoke.
The first thing I noticed upon awakening before the stiffness of my muscles, before the new architecture of this new world, before the new fashions and music was my undeniable, burning thirst. I hadn't fed in years, and now that hunger consumed my every want, desire, and need. I could feel it in my veins, burning for blood.
There was no time to think, only to act. When finished, when I had consumed until I was full, until my thirst had mortals throughout the entirely of Paris had been drained.
There was not a tinge of guilt in my body as there may once have been long ago. I was alive, more alive than I had ever felt. And young. I felt so young, like a prince ready to take on life as a whole.
With a smile drawn on my face and a bright ambition in my eyes, I stepped out into the city to face life once more.
Business opportunities flocked to me from every direction, and I accepted all that were made. Money began to flow into my pocket like rushing water through a breaking dam.
Soon, sooner that I would ever have expected, I was richer than even the noblemen in Paris. And oh, how I spent the money I had acquired. I bough mansion upon mansion and all the finest furnishings to go in them. And, of course, I treated myself to the nicest apparel of the new age.
I made many mortal friends and fed without a care. Before long, I was extremely liked among all those who took up residency in Paris.
Parties were the main event of my new life. Hundreds of people were in attendance.
All the parties and all the people blurred together in my mind. It was difficult to distinguish one from the other.
There was one, however, that stands out vividly in my mind, even today.
The night was pristine, clear, and beautiful. The stars overhead could be seen twinkling like an in love girl's eyes.
I found solace in the shadows of the terrace, watching the hopeless mortals having a gay time sipping their champagne and whispering of ghosts. I saw their curious, wandering eyes clearly. It amused me how insignificant they all were.
As I was caught up in a daze, thinking briefly of far off things, my senses twinged as they hadn't done in years.
This feeling, this knowing, was impossible to forget. It was the acute awareness that there was another of my kind near.
I waited. I knew whomever it was would also be able to feel my presence. I would let them come to me.
It felt as if time had slowed while I waited. I continued to vaguely pay attention to the mortals whom surrounded me on the terrace, although each and every one of them were oblivious to my presence.
The crowd of mortals spilled out of the exit which opened to the terrace, and finally, I saw him. He moved through the crowd in a very sultry and cat-like fashion, in only a way that one of our kind could.
There are not words to accurately describe how he looked that night, how he still looks.
He was beautiful in every single definition of the word. Charming. Alluring. Seductive.
His eyes were like black coals, burning into mine through the blur of mortals. His skin as white as marble, his features chiseled with great precision out of marble.
The feeling that surged through my body like an electric current was one I had never before felt, not even for her.
I thirsted for him, hungered for him like no other.
I had to have him.