The Lust, The Sex, The Heat, This Sweat

The way you dance,
It turns me on
But you know that
I’m spoken for

I incline my head, straining my neck to see around the vibrating crowd as your hips move with the music. You grind roughly against the many men around you, all of their eyes concentrated on you.

The way the sweat
Drips off your chest
You know that
I’m wanting more

The next thing I know, I’m in the crowd. The ground shakes beneath my feet with the techno beat that is jumping from the massive speakers located at the front of the random club I’ve wandered into tonight. I push against the dancing bodies, other peoples’ sweat dripping onto my skin. I finally reach you, half joining your circle by my own free will, half due to falling in when the crowd pulsating inward. You grin and wink at me, grabbing my shirt and effectively yanking me further into the group dance that could better be identified as dry humping.

The lust, the sex
The heat, this sweat

What happens for the next half hour or so is a collage of fast paced techno music and sweaty bodies groping each other. I don’t know when it happened, but suddenly you have me pressed against a grimy bathroom stall door, graffitied with phone numbers and petty insults aimed at anyone and everyone who happened to use this stall. My attention is drawn away from my surroundings as your lips press against mine. They feel as good as I imagined; they feel like they’ve always meant to be there.

And nothing else matters
But you and me
Without your clothes
I already forgot her

My hands creep up your shirt as your hips grind against mine; the rotation growing stronger with each passing second due to our desperation. A moan escapes my lips and is caught by your lips, which are now decorated with a nice smirk.

You have no idea what you do to me

I can feel your heart beating hard against my chest and your breath hot against my neck.

I don’t know how you charmed your way into my heart
And I don’t know how you snuck your way into my house
But I know that I’ll regret what I did
And I know that I’ll regret it forever as I throw my life away

I throw my head back against the metal door as you sink to your knees. Your breath is no longer hot on my neck, but now on my exposed, swollen flesh as you slowly, teasingly draw your lips closer.

The girl I love sits at home, and I know that she’s lonely
But I’m watching you take off your clothes
You’re the star of this moment

You peel off your black, sweat soaked t-shirt and toss it aimlessly behind you. You don’t even notice that it almost lands right in the toilet. Instead, your half lidded eyes are locked on me. You skim up and down my already naked body, licking your lips seductively.

The love, the hate, the guilt, my fate
Is hanging in the balance
You have no idea what you do to me
You don’t even care what you mean to me

I moan out in ecstasy, shocked by how much I’m enjoying this. For years, I’ve been 100% undoubtedly convinced that I was completely straight. I thought that the greatest pleasure that could ever be experienced was pushing into the wet warmth of a woman, but I was wrong. The greatest pleasure that has ever existed is this.

I don’t know how you charmed your way into my heart
And I don’t know how you snuck your way into my house
But I know that I’ll regret what I did
And I know that I’ll regret it forever as I throw my life away

My body strongly convulses against your sweaty skin. I reach the most powerful climax I’ve ever had the honor to experience. All I can think is how disgusted I am with myself by how easily this sinful act has come to me. Literally.

By the time that I come home
She’s already sleeping
I sit on the bed and take off my clothes
My nerves, they’re shaking

I cautiously sit on the bed and undress, knowing that I should take a shower to get rid of the thick smell of sex that surrounded me in a fog. I substituted this badly needed shower with a far less effective, large dose of cologne. I lay down beside her and wrap my arms around her waist, the justified shame pressing down on me until I find it difficult to breathe under the pressure.

The next night I’m home alone. She’s out with her friends tonight. You must have followed me home last night. There’s a knock on the door, and when I look through the window I have to take a moment to catch my breath. I’ve barely opened the door for you and you’re already pushing your way inside. Your arms curl around me and your lips press desperately against mine; I know I shouldn’t, but I kiss back. I don’t want to hurt her, but at this point it’s inevitable.

The lust, the sex, the heat, this sweat
Your body is quaking
The love, the hate, the guilt, my fate
Against this temptation

My back is against the thick quilt covering the bed, this time, instead of a bathroom stall door. The bed I sleep in with her. In our house. I’m about to cheat on her (again) in the bed she sleeps in every night. However, I’m not thinking about how wrong this is right now. You’re straddling my hips and and grinding down, the friction so amazing that in my desperation it’s all I can do to remember to breathe.

I don’t know how you charmed your way into my heart
And I don’t know how you snuck your way into my house

Then you’re inside me again; the headboard is pounding against the wall in time with our hips colliding. This is even better than last night was, but it’s over all too soon. When it’s finished you’re pulling on your clothes as fast as you can; you don’t even bother to fix your hair although it’s sticking up every which way. I can’t help but think how hot it looks.

But I know that I’ll regret what I did
And I know that I’ll regret it forever
As I throw my life away

Now you’re gone and you’ve left me with nothing but the the taste of you on my lips from that one last kiss, and the regrets already sinking in.

Forever as I throw my life away