I'm Not Okay Without You
I Hate His " Girlfriend"
Chapter 18
Frank’s P.O.V.
“Frank, scoot back from the TV.” Ray ordered. I sighed.
“Yes, Mother,” I said, scooting away from the screen. Ally was sitting next to me, looking bored out of her mind. She wasn’t the type to just sit around; she would rather be making out or having sex or running around the block, not sitting in front of a TV at Mikey’s. The door opened and I let my gaze wander over to it, feeling bored out of mind and body myself, and saw an almost nervous looking Gerard. It took me a moment to notice that there was something attached to his hand. I felt my eyes widen as I realized it was Seidee. ‘What the…?’ Gerard was the first to speak.
“Guys, I have something to tell you,” he said.
“Okay, what is it?” Bob asked, barely even paying attention.
“You all know Seidee,” he paused, continuing when everyone nodded. “Well… we’re going out now.” He was looking at me while he said this. I fought to keep my emotions below the surface. Was he lying when he said they were ‘just friends’? How could he do that to me? Did he feel nothing at all towards me anymore?
Mikey broke me out of my thoughts by saying, “Congrats, bro.”
“Yeah, congrats,” everyone else said cheerfully. I just sat there, staring off into a black corner of the room.
“Kay, I’m thirsty,” Gerard said, looking like he didn’t get the Christmas present he wanted. “Seidee, do you want anything?”
“Um, no, I’m good,” she said, plopping down on the couch. Gerard shrugged slightly and moved toward the kitchen. I took this as an opportunity to talk to him alone. He had his head in the fridge, looking through it. He hadn’t noticed me walk in, so when he shut the fridge and saw me it came as a surprise.
“Whoa, hi, Frank,” he said, smiling slightly.
“Hi.” I decided to cut to the chase. “I thought you said she was a friend and nothing more,” I said, not being able to keep the anger out of my voice.
“Well… we were, but she’s really nice and she knows everything about how we used to be... and I feel comfortable with her.
“Oh, so you told her about us and that was it?”
“Yeah… but I only did that because I needed someone to talk to and she was supportive of us.”
“Then why couldn’t you let the world know?” I asked quietly, turning on my heal and stomping out of the kitchen. I noticed he was following me, and I really didn’t need to make a scene in front of the guys, or Ally, for that matter, so I stormed up the stairs.
“I’ll be right back,” I heard Gerard say reassuringly. ‘Probably to that little bitch,’ I thought, gritting my teeth. I slammed the door to the nearest room and sat on the bed, letting an aggravated sigh escape my lips. I noticed the door opening. ‘Great going, Sherlock, you didn’t lock the door.’
“Frank, I told you I was sorry. I’m still trying to get up the nerve to tell everyone what we used to be,” Gerard said, like reminding me was supposed to make everything better.
“Well, Gerard, I don’t care anymore. I have a girlfriend that I love.” Love. I nearly choked on the word. I didn’t love Ally; I could barely stand the girl.
“Frank…I—“ He was cut off by Ally’s voice.
“Frankie, what’s wrong, baby?” she asked, referring to my little temper tantrum downstairs.
“Nothing,” I said, making the word sound as final as it could. Nothing was wrong. I had a girlfriend, I was in a band, I could play guitar, I was a fucking rock star, so how could anything be wrong? Before I knew it, Ally was in my face, her lips glued to mine. I just let myself fall into the kiss, hoping Gerard would just realize what he lost, shove her out of the way, and kiss me. He didn’t, though. He never did what I wanted him to do. When I could finally see past Ally, I noticed that he was gone, probably off to make out with his new girlfriend.
Frank’s P.O.V.
“Frank, scoot back from the TV.” Ray ordered. I sighed.
“Yes, Mother,” I said, scooting away from the screen. Ally was sitting next to me, looking bored out of her mind. She wasn’t the type to just sit around; she would rather be making out or having sex or running around the block, not sitting in front of a TV at Mikey’s. The door opened and I let my gaze wander over to it, feeling bored out of mind and body myself, and saw an almost nervous looking Gerard. It took me a moment to notice that there was something attached to his hand. I felt my eyes widen as I realized it was Seidee. ‘What the…?’ Gerard was the first to speak.
“Guys, I have something to tell you,” he said.
“Okay, what is it?” Bob asked, barely even paying attention.
“You all know Seidee,” he paused, continuing when everyone nodded. “Well… we’re going out now.” He was looking at me while he said this. I fought to keep my emotions below the surface. Was he lying when he said they were ‘just friends’? How could he do that to me? Did he feel nothing at all towards me anymore?
Mikey broke me out of my thoughts by saying, “Congrats, bro.”
“Yeah, congrats,” everyone else said cheerfully. I just sat there, staring off into a black corner of the room.
“Kay, I’m thirsty,” Gerard said, looking like he didn’t get the Christmas present he wanted. “Seidee, do you want anything?”
“Um, no, I’m good,” she said, plopping down on the couch. Gerard shrugged slightly and moved toward the kitchen. I took this as an opportunity to talk to him alone. He had his head in the fridge, looking through it. He hadn’t noticed me walk in, so when he shut the fridge and saw me it came as a surprise.
“Whoa, hi, Frank,” he said, smiling slightly.
“Hi.” I decided to cut to the chase. “I thought you said she was a friend and nothing more,” I said, not being able to keep the anger out of my voice.
“Well… we were, but she’s really nice and she knows everything about how we used to be... and I feel comfortable with her.
“Oh, so you told her about us and that was it?”
“Yeah… but I only did that because I needed someone to talk to and she was supportive of us.”
“Then why couldn’t you let the world know?” I asked quietly, turning on my heal and stomping out of the kitchen. I noticed he was following me, and I really didn’t need to make a scene in front of the guys, or Ally, for that matter, so I stormed up the stairs.
“I’ll be right back,” I heard Gerard say reassuringly. ‘Probably to that little bitch,’ I thought, gritting my teeth. I slammed the door to the nearest room and sat on the bed, letting an aggravated sigh escape my lips. I noticed the door opening. ‘Great going, Sherlock, you didn’t lock the door.’
“Frank, I told you I was sorry. I’m still trying to get up the nerve to tell everyone what we used to be,” Gerard said, like reminding me was supposed to make everything better.
“Well, Gerard, I don’t care anymore. I have a girlfriend that I love.” Love. I nearly choked on the word. I didn’t love Ally; I could barely stand the girl.
“Frank…I—“ He was cut off by Ally’s voice.
“Frankie, what’s wrong, baby?” she asked, referring to my little temper tantrum downstairs.
“Nothing,” I said, making the word sound as final as it could. Nothing was wrong. I had a girlfriend, I was in a band, I could play guitar, I was a fucking rock star, so how could anything be wrong? Before I knew it, Ally was in my face, her lips glued to mine. I just let myself fall into the kiss, hoping Gerard would just realize what he lost, shove her out of the way, and kiss me. He didn’t, though. He never did what I wanted him to do. When I could finally see past Ally, I noticed that he was gone, probably off to make out with his new girlfriend.