Daylight

Viv’s POV

I woke to the smell of coffee—real coffee, not the crap I’d been drinking lately. As my nose awoke me, I realized bit by bit that I was still in a hotel room, and that whatever the hell time it was, it was freaking late.
And Tim was sure to be royally pissed.
Still, that didn’t exactly make me want to move any faster. I was a little achy in places, maybe a little stiff from having slept curled up with…
Billy! All my brain cells lit up at the same time. Shit. Which meant he was still here too. Or should be, anyway.
That thought made me leap from the bed, grab the nearest robe, and thunder into the suite’s sitting room. Bill sat calmly, eating breakfast, watching TV and reading the LA Times.
“Ah, good mornin’,” he greeted me with a smile. “I thought yeh’d sleep all day, but clearly I was wrong. Have some coffee.”
I nodded and he poured me a cup. I took a sip and asked, “What time is it?”
“Just about nine.”
I looked at him suspiciously. “Really? In what time zone is it 9 am?”
“This one,” he replied, indicating the TV. “See? Just nine. So sit down and eat.”
I slid into one of the chairs at the tiny breakfast table. Of course, maybe it just looked tiny because it had more dishes on it than I personally owned.
“What’s all this?” I demanded.
“Scottish breakfast,” he informed me. “Oatmeal—very good for you—eggs, sausages…” He leaned a little closer to where I sat and raised his eyebrows. “And the most lucisous strawberries yeh’ve ever seen,” he continued. The look in his eyes was enough to make me blush. Jesus!
I kept a straight face despite the fact that I could tell my cheeks were burning. “You said we’d talk,” I reminded him.
“No, Viv, you said we’d talk,” he replied pleasantly, spooning oatmeal into the nearest bowl and handing it off to me. “However, I have a policy to discuss nothing with anyone who’s not had breakfast.” A milk pitcher and brown sugar followed the bowl in quick succession. “So eat, then we’ll talk. When d’yeh have to be back at work?”
I sighed, giving up. “I should be there now,” I lamented.
Billy shrugged. “I’ll call Tim, tell him I was givin’yeh an exclusive interview—among other things,” he suggested.
The spoon was halfway to my mouth—good thing, because he would’ve been wearing my oatmeal, had I been eating. “You wouldn’t.”
He looked at me innocently. “What, he wouldn’t be interested in what I’ve been up to?”
I dropped the spoon. “Bill, stop it, please,” I begged.
His smile was huge; he’d won. “Go ahead and have breakfast, Vivian,” he said softly. “I’ll stop, I promise. For now, anyway.”

A half hour later, I was finally done with all the food Billy had shoveled onto my plate. Damn, how was I going to fit back into my clothes?
“Good?” Billy smiled over at me.
I smiled back. “Very good, but I better get going.”
“Vivian,” he said in exasperation, “how can we talk if you’re running away?”
I got up. “Maybe now isn’t the best time,” I hedged.
He caught my hand and pulled me to him. “Now is the only time. Otherwise it’ll be never.”
Dammit, the touch of his hand was already making my temperature go up. Not good. “Can I at least put my clothes on?” I whined.
He nodded and let go, and I dashed for the bedroom.

I strolled out a few minutes later, having located my clothes and purse, repaired my makeup, and brushed my hair.
Billy looked up from his paper and smiled. “You look lovely.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I said, dropping back into the chair opposite him.
He pulled a face at my tone. “Is that how you usually take a compliment?”
I sighed. “It depends on how mad my boss is gonna be when he finds out I’ve been gone all night.”
“And how would he know that?”
“Well,” I replied, “I was with a whole roomful of college students last night, most of whom I’m sure may recall me packing them off to the buses while telling them I’d see them later.”
“Ah. More coffee, then?”
I rolled my eyes. “Sure, why not?”
I sipped at the warm liquid after he poured it, looking everywhere in the suite but at him, stalling for time. When I looked up, Billy was watching me again.
“What?” I challenged him.
He cocked his head to one side. “What d’ye think?”
I slumped down in my seat. Damn. “Talking…?” I asked meekly.
He nodded. “Sit up, willya? It hurts to watch yeh do that.”
I straightened up and waited. A minute passed as we stared at each other.
“I’m guessing you wanted me to start, then?” Bill remarked. I nodded.
“Alright then,” he sighed. “Look, Viv, last night, I wasn’t tryin’ to force yer hand, but we’ve known each other quite a few years.”
I took another drink of coffee. “You mean if you don’t count the years you were married to Sharon.”
He scowled. “Well, we still knew each other then, even if we didn’t keep in touch...”
“…translated as we weren’t sleeping togther,” I finished.
He looked like he was going to snark back, but he checked himself and continued calmly. “Is that all yeh think this is about? Vivian, yeh know how I told you I knew somethin’ was missin’ from my life when I saw you last night?”
“You mean someone with a brain, who uses it, instead of those little girls you’re always seen with?” Jesus, but I can be catty sometimes.
“I’ve told you already, they don’t mean anything to me,” Billy insisted. “What I mean is that I knew last night when I saw you that I’d made a mistake all those years ago.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He was quiet for a minute. When he finally spoke, I could barely hear him. “It means that aside from Joni, everythin’ that happened with me and Sharon was wrong.”
For once, I didn’t have a smart-ass answer. I just let him go on.
“I dunno what I was thinkin’ with her,” he continued, rubbing his eyes, “except maybe I’d never get a chance with someone like that.”
I was going to laugh at that—to think of Bill alone was almost ridiculous—but I knew the feeling he was talking about. So I shut the hell up.
“She hurt me, and I let her. She cheated and lied, and I took it. I thought I was so in love with her, and that someday she’d see it and stop trying to fuckin’ destroy me…but she wouldn’t, and she didn’t.”
I reached out my hand to his, to try and comfort him and show that I understood. Before I could touch him, though, his hand twitched as if to throw mine off. That little gesture told me he didn’t want or expect pity, so I detoured my own hand back to my coffee cup as if that had been its original destination.
He looked towards the windows of his suite, but I could tell that he wasn’t really seeing the bright day outside. After a few minutes, he sipped at his coffee again and looked up at me. The look of near-sadness was gone from his eyes. “I asked you what I did last night,” he continued, “because I finally knew that I’d grown up enough to do it.”
I couldn’t resist. “You? Billy Z? Grown up?”
“I know what you’re tryin’ to do,” he sighed, “but it won’t work. I had a lot of time to think about what I was gonna tell you when you woke up.”
“And that is…?”
He looked me dead in the eye. “I realized…I love you, Viv.”

My mouth dropped open. Good thing I was sitting at a table, or it would’ve hit the floor.
“Your turn,” Bill offered cheerfully.
I shook my head, too stunned to speak for once.
“Ah, come on,” he prodded. “I showed you mine, as they say. Yer just gonna leave me flappin’ in the bloody wind?”
My head filled with a thousand things to say, something, anything, all fighting to get out at once, so of course, nothing did.
What could I say? What even made sense anymore?
My face was flaming, I knew it. What the hell, was I fourteen again?
I took a deep breath. “Bill, I--” I began.
And then my phone rang. It startled me so badly that I almost dropped my purse again. I dug for it frantically, not really planning to answer it, but just trying to shut it the fuck up.
Then I saw the number: it was Tim. Of course.
I looked back up at Billy, who was starting to be impatient. “I—I have to get this,” I mumbled.
He waved a hand at me and looked over at the TV. The expression on his face broke my heart.
Still watching Bill, I answered the call. “Hey, Tim,” I greeted him, trying to sound cheerful and not at all like I was in a hotel room with an old lover.
“Viv, where the hell are you?”
“Good morning to you too,” I replied, trying to keep the sarcasm out of my voice.
“Whatever,” he snapped. “So where are you?”
I took a deep breath. Suddenly, I don’t know how, my anger faded; I was in control of myself. “I’m in downtown LA, having breakfast with a friend,” I answered
“You should be here,” he hissed. I could hear him grinding his teeth. Good!
“Well, Tim, I’m sorry about that, but I can’t be in two places at once,” I said pleasantly. “Was there something you needed from me this morning?” Or were you just pissed when you realized I wasn’t with your little herd?
“Assignments needed to be passed out this morning, like always,” he grumbled, “or did you forget what your job is?”
“Oh, sorry,” I replied. “You know what, Bobby knows where they are. Just ask him, I’m sure he can help you till I get there.”
“That’s not his job.”
“He’s been helping me out, Tim,” I answered patiently. Billy had turned back to me and was watching as I stayed calm, while my boss was clearly getting more annoyed.
I was actually smiling. It was—fun.
Bill leaned closer. “Let me talk to ‘im,” he whispered.
I shrugged, thinking Why not? “Tim, I have someone here who’d like to say hi,” I smiled, anticipating his reaction. “Here you go.”
Billy took the phone as I handed it off. “Tim Karan, is it?” he boomed. “Billy Z here, how are yeh, then?” He paused, listening. “Yes, that’s me! Oh, I’m just in LA visitin’ my lovely daughter, who lives here with her mum.” He went quiet again for a moment. “Ah, yes, we’re plannin’ on goin’ to Warped today, she wouldn’t miss it!”
Bill leaned forward and took my hand, kissing it. “Why, yes, Viv and I are old friends. When I saw her, I just couldn’t resist the urge to…catch up with her.” I wasn’t sure how that tied in to his usual innuendo, but I was pretty sure he thought it was a dirty thing to say.
He cast a glance in my direction again and his eyes widened. “Oh! Of course you can speak to her, Tim. Thanks fer lettin’ me ramble,” he remarked. “Have a good one, mate, and I’m sure we’ll run into each other sometime.”
I took back the phone, still smiling…which didn’t last long, naturally.
“Vivian, when are you going to get back here?” Tim demanded. Apparently Billy’s charm didn’t quite work on everyone.
I sighed. “I’m on my way, Tim. I’ll be onsite within the hour.”
“You’d better be,” he said shortly and disconnected without another word.

I let the phone drop into my purse and looked at Billy. From the the expression on his face, he was still waiting to hear an answer I just didn’t have.
“I need to go,” I began, but got no further.
He frowned. “This isn’t some game, Viv,” he said quickly. “I’m not just makin’ this up here.”
I squeezed his hand, still holding mine. “I know, Bill, but you don’t want me to just blurt out the first thing that comes to me, do you?”
“Of course not.”
“Well, I’m still trying for an answer, and I need time.”
“Time?” He looked stricken.
“Bill,” I said quietly, “listen, please. You had time to think about me this morning, maybe even last night. Hell, you brought up this whole thing, and I’m sorry, but it caught me off-guard.”
He shook his head and opened his mouth, but I beat him to it.
“Z, look, I…” I flicked a glance over to the windows, noting how bright it was outside and measuring how pissed Tim already was, versus how furious he’d be if I didn’t show up soon.
Then I thought, Fuck it!
“Z,” I started over, “I’ve had—have—feelings for you, you know that, right?” He nodded, and I rushed on. “But having something more permanent with you, not even getting married, but even just love… I didn’t allow myself to think about it in a serious way. Not all this time. It would’ve hurt too much.”
He bit his lip. I went on: “I traveled all over, trying to make my career, trying to get ahead, and I pretty much left the personal side of me behind. It’s not dead, just…sleeping. So please, give me time to…wake it up, and see how things feel. Will that be okay?”
He finally spoke. “I know it’s not dead, darlin’,” he murmured. “Yeh’ve kept it alive for…certain people. Right?”
I nodded.
“So there’s hope, then?”
I smiled. “There might be.”
He smiled back. “I’ll only be in town till Friday.” It was Tuesday.
“We’ll be in a different town on Friday,” I replied. “I’ll have time before then.”
“I hope so,” Billy answered, getting up. “I can drive yeh, if you like. Just let me get dressed.”
“No, it’s okay,” I told him. “You’re getting together with Joni. Have the time with her you need. I’ll probably see you later.”
He nodded. “Alright, well, then have a good day, Viv,” he said softly. “And remember what I said.”
“I will,” I promised, gathering my things and walking to the door. He caught me just before I unlocked it. “So you don’t forget,” he breathed onto my skin, and kissed me.

I felt drunk and dizzy walking down the hall. But in a good way.