Strange Sepia

The summer rain pattered like crow's feet on a bridge and fell down the windows like tears. It was ever so strange, for the weather had been glorious and warm earlier, sun shining and just a gentle breeze, a perfect summer's day. Helen heard a knock at the door above the roaring rainstorm.

It was Toby.

"Are you alright?" he asked, looking concerned
"Yeah, I'm fine," Helen frowned, seemingly confused. She looked down and saw that he was holding something.
"What's that?"
"Oh, nothing. Just a really old photo."
He handed it to her, and she peered at it. It was wrinkly, iced with dust as if it had not been touched in years, and the most peculiar colour, the type of golden wash you commonly see on Edwardian photgraphs.
Toby spoke, but Helen could not hear. The photograph showed two girls, both young and in white dresses, standing on a hill surrounded by long, yellow grass.

She suddenly felt a hand on her shoulder.
"Helen?" Toby looked at her, his eyes curious and filled with concern.
"Yes?" But her eyes were distant and other-worldly.
"What happened...well, earlier? Is everything okay now?"
Helen racked her brains and frowned. She thought she had only just got up.
"Nothing. Look, you better come in."
But Toby stood still.
"Did you just...panic? I was really worried."
Helen furrowed her brow and started to get slightly annoyed. Was it her fault, had she done
something wrong? Or was Toby just making all this up? She shook her head.
"Look Toby, I don't know what you're talking about." She told him, but he urged on.
"You know, at the park..." Then he saw the look in Helen's eyes, and saw her getting annoyed with him. It was clear she couldn't remember anything about it, so he gave up asking and stepped through Helen's door.

*

The rain was harder now, but both of them were dry, bundled inside Helen's bedroom. Then something caught Toby's eye.
"You have a guitar?"
He asked, mildly surprised as Helen spun around and took a look at her old Spanish guitar. She couldn't play it, but she had gone on about them so much when she was younger that her parents gave in and bought her one for her ninth birthday.
"Do you play?" He asked, reaching for it.
Helen blushed slightly. Here she was, sitting with the guitar maestro of her school, and she couldn't even play one chord.
"No, I don't. I just wanted a guitar."
Toby held it and plucked a string. He raised his eyebrows and his lip curled slightly.
"Jeez. That's out of tune."
And as he sat there, tuning her old guitar, Helen looked lovingly at him and wondered how it
had all come to this. Her life had changed immensely in the past couple of weeks, and she didn't think one boy could make that impact. Everything was different now. She smiled to herself because she had never thought, in a million years, that she would be sitting here with Toby. Of all the boys in her class, he had seemed the most unattainable, the handsome guy who kept his distance from girls, but had everyone's respect.

Helen brushed a strand of curly hair out of her eyes, and caught his gaze as he looked up for a second. For a minute they at each other, and in that moment, they knew everything about one
another, but it came so hurriedly that they could not comprehend it. Toby leant forwards to be closer to her, and kissed her first on the nose, then the cheeks, and eventually reached her mouth. His lips were soft and cold, and his skin smelt of the sea. Helen fell back, and brought him closer to her, touching his neck and running her fingers through his thick white hair.
They embraced as if they never wanted let go, and Helen knew this was it.

*

My breathing then quickens. He looks up and smiles, pushing his self into me. A sharp pain enters my thoughts, but after a few seconds it subsides. As I arched my back, a sense of Deja Vu hits me, and I remember the dream I once had of Hermia, the kiss we shared, the night we slept together. Now I can hear her voice, ripe and clear through the night.
"Don't do it."
I furrow my brow, eyes still closed.
"You don't love him. I do. You love me, you love me, Helen."
Who was speaking? I can picture her in my mind. Hermia?
Was she talking about Toby? Of course I love Toby. How could she doubt that?
"You don't."
Reassuring myself, I open my eyes and search for his beautiful gaze above me. But I see no beauty as I did before, just a feeling of my soul stolen.

"Toby?" I say scared, and he looks down upon me.
"Yes?"

"You're not...you're not Toby, are you?"
He frowns at me, but does not cease.
"Yes...I am..."
But I can still hear her voice, telling me to stop.
"Stop Helen, or I leave you, for good, and take Toby with me"
He tries to kiss me, but I push him away.
"No..stop, Toby."
He pretends to ignore me.
"Toby! Please!"
I can still hear Hermia threaten to go. I can't let her go. But if he doesn't stop.
"No" He answers "No, Helen."
"Please Toby! You don't know why, I need you to stop, go, please!"
He carries on, as I struggle, but he holds me still.
"TOBY!" I start to shout
He stares at me.
"Why?" He asks, seemingly angry
"Toby...please," I start to beg him "She says..."
He frowns.
"Who says what?"
I can't tell him. But how can I make him see? A tear starts to run down my cheek.
"She'll leave me Toby, if you don't stop, please, PLEASE!"
He grows yet more angry.
"Answer me, WHO will leave you?" He demands, and I have no choice but to tell him.
"She...Hermia."

"Hermia? HERMIA?" Confused, he becomes more angry.
"She lives with me, if you don't stop, she'll go, please, please stop Toby, I beg you!"
I start to cry harder, but he will not let me go.
Suddenly calm, he utters,
"It's all in your head, Helen"
I shake my head. No. She lives.
"No. No. NO!" I argue
"For fuck's sake, Helen! You're out of your mind!"
I struggle and bawl, but he will not let me go however much I beg of him.
"NO!" I screech "Let me go! Let me go!"
"You fucking lunatic!"
He stays silent through the rest of my screams, until he is finished.
He grabs his clothes, dresses and leaves me naked.
"You keep silent now, crazy girl. Don't you tell."
The last words he utters before walking out.