In-Jokes A-Z

By the time two or three weeks had gone by, it was almost routine that the two girls would spend the afternoons after school in the library. While teachers may have hoped it was because they had such wonderfully studious students, this was not the case. As Rachel had only recently moved from England, her new home was a little lacking in the internet department. And with a boyfriend far overseas, the only way she could communicate with him was through a Chinese chat program that had slipped under the IT block.

As for Alex? Well, she just didn’t want to lug a heavy laptop for over 2km in the searing heat that was Australia’s summer.

“Okay, I’ll sign us in – what was your tutor group again?” Rachel asked. Really, this school was like a fortress and actually quite similar to her house now she thought of it.

“10C-” the blonde began, peering over Rachel’s shoulder. “Hey, my last name doesn’t end in E.”

Scribbling the offensive letter out, the other girl dumped all her stuff into Alex’s arms. “Ok, you just take this and I’ll be up in a sec.” The library had two floors, the top of which only Years 10-12 were allowed in.

Alexandra staggered up the stairs, and unable to even see where she was going from all the things she was holding piled in her arms. Fortunately, she managed to everything on the tables without too much disaster and booted up her laptop.

Rachel sat down and checked the Mibba account Alex had helped her create. Only two reviews. Seemed a little tragic when you personally knew who they were. Oh well. She grinned and logged into QQ.

More or less ignoring her, Alex began tapping away at her English essay. Teachers here wasted no time in loading the workload on, just like in Hong Kong. Spending a year in the Aussie public school system had really turned her into a slacker. She frowned, looking up to ask the other girl a question.

“Hey, Rachel…” she began.

No response. The dark-haired girl just stared, a hopelessly love-struck expression on her face as he looked at her computer screen.

Alex was sorely tempted to snap it shut. “Earth to Rach!” She shouted, slamming her hand onto the desk. Everyone else in the library gave her a ‘shut-up-you-public-school-kid’ look.

“Yes?” Rachel asked completely oblivious.

“Argh, never mind…” Alex knew it was pointless to ask for Rachel’s help, as her brain was obviously elsewhere.

“Oh, I know!” Rachel exclaimed. “I’m going to make a banner for my story.”

“A Wish Gone Wrong?” Alex asked, and the other girl nodded and started searching on Google. Dang it, every image was blocked! Something about social networking sites. Rachel was amazing on Photoshop, but there was not real point if she had nothing to work with.

She continued the hunt for a suitable picture for her heroine. Like a very bad cartoon hunter, she hacked her way through Photobucket and Google Image. With a machete – ahem, keyboard and mouse.

Alex glanced at the clock. “Let’s go back at four thirty, okay?”

“Five!” Rachel argued, desperate to spend more time with her boyfriend online.

“But I’m already done with my homework!” Though the blonde could already tell that her math grade was going to be an epic fail. She should probably study…nah. Life was for living. Not wasting your time going over algebraic equations you were supposed to have learned last year, which had been a total bludge.

Meanwhile, Rachel had found some pretty good pictures, although not for A Wish Gone Wrong. After cropping the head off a pregnant guy, she’d found a nice one to use for Harry Louis, one of her characters in Bonfire Boys.

Yes, that’s right. A pregnant guy. A normal person would have found that traumatizing.

Quietly (and off key) Alex started singing under her breath. “Should I go ahead and propose and get hitched and have kids with eleven toes…” The curse of Weird Al’s Constipated had yet to fade.

Rachel scrolled down, searching “Brunette”. Most of the images were blocked, except for a tiny one at the bottom of the screen. Of course, being who she was, Rachel recognized it immediately. It was the perfect thing to get revenge with.

“Look at this!” Alex found herself being half-dragged around to look at Rachel’s computer monitor.

The English girl pointed at the screen. “See?”

“See what?” She didn’t get it. The image just looked like a blob of brown and skin-color. With a couple lines thrown in, but they didn’t make any sense.

“Look closer!” Rachel shoved her towards the screen so she was almost nose-to-nose with the image.

“I still don’t get it…”

“Hah, you innocent,” the shorter girl scoffed, reaching to close the window. She could hardly have revenge if the subject couldn’t even recognize what was supposed to scare her. Ah, ignorance was a bliss.

“What are you guys looking at?” A girl at the other table came and leaned over the two’s shoulders, trying to see what all the fuss was about.

Rachel quickly ushered her away. “Oh, no, nothing at all…” No point in having too many needed victims. She didn’t want too many casualties resulting from her perverted nature.

“I don’t get it!”

“Look at it properly!”

“I am looking!”

“Can’t you see the people?” Rachel demanded.

“I don’t see any faces…”

Sigh. Seems she’d have to be really blunt. “That’s because they aren’t in the picture.”

Alex frowned. This just seemed to confuse her even more than she already was, if that were possible. “So that darker patch isn’t hair then?”

“Oh, it’s hair alright…” Rachel sniggered.

“What?” Alex frowned for a moment, turning her head to one side. Then it clicked. “Oh my God!” She covered her mouth with a hand.

The last thing she had expected to see from the result of searching “Brunette” was a very-zoomed in pornographic image.