I Don't Need You To Save Me

I stared at my reflection in the small vanity mirror hanging on my bedroom wall. I ran a pair of straighteners over my half wavy hair, desperate to get rid of its natural kinks and flicks.

A week had flown by, I didn’t even realise that the brothers performance at the coffee shop had actually arrived so soon. It wasn’t until Joe started panicking about forgetting his words that it actually dawned on me that he could possibly be giving the performance that could change his life and his brother’s lives quite drastically.

When I had called my father about him asking some people to come up here to listen to the brother’s play, I had expected him to say no or at least take a lot of convincing, but surprisingly he seemed more then willing to help the boys out.

“Dad?” I had asked him in the same sickly sweet voice I always used when I wanted something. He’d noticed this straight away.

“Hayleigh, what do you want? I’ve got a meeting in five minutes, so please hurry up.” He had sighed down the phone at me. Once I had asked him my question though he seemed all for the idea, telling me that I should have called him about it earlier and he would have told lots of people about the gig.

The only problem was, I didn’t know exactly who was coming up to Wyckoff. I knew that somebody was coming up, for definite, I just didn’t know who it was. My father refused to disclose that kind of information to me, knowing that when I want something I can be very persuasive.

At the end of the day Kevin, Nick and Joe were excited and pleased, and that was all that mattered.

I heard a knock on my bedroom door and I turned round as much as the wire on the straighteners would allow me to. I saw Joe peek his head round the side of the door and I smiled welcomingly to him, inviting him in. He’d taken my advice and left his hair natural and curly for the gig. I smiled again at that.

“Your hair looks nice.” I pointed out before turning back to face the mirror. “I told you it looks better curly.” I could see in the reflection of the mirror that he was rolling his eyes at me.

“Isn’t it a bit hypocritical?” Joe asked me. “Telling me to keep my hair curly when you’re straightening your own?”

I frowned and turned to face him again. “Yes, but I don’t always straighten my hair, so therefore I’m allowed to once in a while.”

“Whatever.” Joe grinned at me and then flopped down onto my bed. “But your hair looks better curly as well.”

I stuck my tongue out at him and went back to straightening my hair.

“You know, if I mess up and forget some words tonight, its on your head.” Joe informed me a few minutes later. I rolled my eyes at him, but didn’t bother turning round.

“Hey! Don’t make me out to be the bad guy here.” I laughed and set my straighteners down, “If anything I’m good enough to be your fairy godmother!” I smiled and stepped over the wire that was hanging around my feet. I skipped lightly over to where he sat and collapsed on the bed next to him. He looked over at me and shook his head.

“What makes you think I was talking about the guy from the record company, or whoever your Dad’s sending up here.” He asked. I narrowed my eyes at him.

“I'm guessing that even if I ask you won’t elaborate any more then that will you?” I asked.

“No.” Joe shook his head and smiled as he replied. He looked away from me before glancing back quickly and adding, “You’re not the only one with secrets.” He winked and then looked away again.

“Don’t try and guilt trip me Jonas.” I warned him with a playful smile. He looked back over at me and then raised an eyebrow.

“And what exactly are you planning on doing about it?” He replied and folded his arms. I looked round the room, trying to think of something I could use as retaliation. When I came up blank I did the first think that came into my head. I poked him in the side.

“Did you just poke me?” He asked with a smile that mixed between confusion and mock disbelief. I nodded sheepishly and ducked my head so that my newly straightened hair hid my face. I was trying my best not to laugh out loud at my own random stupidity.

“Well two can play at that game.” Joe laughed and then poked me in the side.

I burst out laughing and clamped my arms to my side to protect myself. I happen to be a very ticklish person in all the most obvious places. Joe noticed this and grinned.

“Are you really that ticklish?” He asked with wide eyes. I blinked a few times before nodding my head slowly. I wondered if that was the right thing to tell him. A mischievous glint in his eye seemed to give me my answer and I scrambled away from him.

“Joe, don’t you even dare!” I warned him, but he didn’t seem phased at all. He moved closer to me and started to attack my sides. I burst into fits of giggles and my eyes started watering because I was laughing so much.

Eventually he gave up, either he got bored or I was just crying too much he thought something was wrong. I collapsed onto my back and laid on my bed, fighting to try and get my breathing back to normal. Joe looked down at me with an amused smile plain on his face.

“You really are that ticklish aren’t you?” He asked. I blushed and covered my face with my hands.

“And you’re really quite mean.” I shouted even though it sounded muffled through my hands.

“Aw, come on. You loved it really.” He joked and rested on his arm so he was half leaning over me. I peaked out through the gaps in-between my fingers. “Don’t be mad.” He laughed and I dropped my hands away from my face.

“It depends on how you’re going to make it up to me?” I pouted and pretended like I was really annoyed with him.

Its funny, because to say I am an actress, I really suck at lying.

“Aren’t actresses supposed to be good at lying?” Joe asked me as if he had been in tune with my thoughts. “Isn’t that like your job?” He asked me again innocently.

I blinked and tried to reorder my thoughts before answering, still shocked that it had been like he had read my mind. I wondered if he could hear my heart beating a mile a minute against my chest.

“Well, its not like we’re actually lying.” I pointed out, “Personally, I throw myself into the roll, you know. I try to become the other person so I give it my best performance.”

“You really do love it don’t you?” Joe asked and I nodded, part of me knowing it was just going to mess up my hair and a more dominant part not really caring. He’d seen me at my worst. I didn’t have anything to hide.

“Like you wouldn’t believe.” I sighed and stared up at the ceiling. I had applied that phrase to so many things before, but only this time did it actually feel like I meant it one hundred percent. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Joe’s hand reaching towards my face, and my eyes snapped back to his. “What are you doing?” I asked him quietly.

I didn’t get my reply in the form of words. Joe simply reached down and brushed a stray strand of hair away from my face. My cheeks flushed bright pink. I was expecting it to stop there. I was definitely not expecting Joe to do what he did next.

Joe leaned further over me and moved his head so it was inches away from my own. All of a sudden it was like the past five minutes of trying to get my breathing back to normal had never happened. He hovered over me, pausing, possibly to decide exactly what to do.

Then he closed the space between us and pressed his lips gently onto mine.

My hands found a life of their own and one reached up to the back of his neck in an attempt to lock him firmly in place. I didn’t want him to go anywhere in a hurry. From where my hand sat on his neck, I could faintly feel his pulse. It was beating softly against his skin as fast as my heart was against my chest.

Almost as quickly as he had initiated the kiss, Joe ended it. He pulled away from me and avoided eye contact with me. I pulled myself upright and stared intently at his face, my hand still on the back of his neck.

I wanted more; I wanted to kiss him again. I was surprised at myself.

Joe looked up at me, his eyes looking as though they were apologising to me. I moved my hand to his cheek.

“Hayleigh, I can...” Joe trailed off and looked away from me again. I ducked my head so he was no longer looking away from me.

“You can what Joe?” I urged him on.

“I don’t know.” He breathed. It was strange seeing him without a smile, I had grown so used to it.

I looked up into his dark eyes, encouraging him to say or do something else. Anything else.

We both jumped when someone knocked against the wooden door. I dropped my hand from his cheek and shuffled back away from him. Nick pushed the door open and poked his head through the door. He clearly knew something had happened, just from the look on his face, but he didn’t say anything.

“Erm, Joe? Mom wants to speak to you downstairs.” He explained and opened the door wider.

Joe sighed and looked over at me. “We’ll talk later?” He asked me hopefully, as if he wasn’t sure I would want to talk to him. I nodded silently and he hopped off my bed, leaving the covers ruffled, dashing past Nick who still stood in the doorway. I looked down at my hands, forgetting for a moment that he was stood there watching me.

“Is everything alright?” He asked quietly. My eyes flashed to his and I smiled.

“I think so.” I replied, hoping that I was right.

“Well, are you nearly ready to go?” He asked. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror, I could just see myself as it hung on the wall. My mascara had started to run a little after my eyes had started to water, but it could be easily fixed. I turned back to Nick before climbing off the bed.

“Give me ten minutes and I should be ready.” I smiled, hoping that this was a bit more convincing then my last.

“Ok, if you say so.” He smiled back at me and walked away, leaving my door slightly ajar. I wondered if he had some inkling into what had just happened between Joe and I and if he would keep quiet or interrogate me about it later on. I frowned to myself and started an attempt to fix my mascara.