It's All We Know

Jessi's POV

I caught up to him just as he was leaving the mall, as I stood in front of him panting trying to catch my breath, he didn’t even look at me, instead looked to the side, he looked really annoyed.

“I’m sorry, for saying that,” I said.

He looked at me with disbelief and shook his head.

“I duno why I bother with you Jessi,” he said sadly.

“You know why, and I really am sorry,” I said quietly.

There was a long pause, Rian looked at me carefully before he spoke again.

“Jessi, you know if I could of I would have stayed with you,” he said placing his hands on my shoulders.

“I know, but I was angry,” I said my voice was barely above a whisper, I’m surprised he heard it.

“And you are still angry now, I think you need to get away from here, or something,” he said.

“Maybe I just need away from you?” I looked up at him questioningly.

“Jess, I thought you were over this? I apologised, I even tried to get back to see you after I left, but I couldn’t, the guys… it was too important, and perhaps maybe if you returned my calls, or my emails, or anything we wouldn’t have lost touch, people can still be friends and not see each other every day. It was you that broke contact with me.” He spoke quite loudly, when he finished he seemed quite proud of his rant. I didn’t know what to think, part of me was screaming hug him, tell him he is right, but the other part was too reluctant to agree. It wasn’t that simple.

“No Rian, it was you, you left,” I said numbly.

“Argh Jessi! Why can’t you understand how important it was for me to go, I know this hurts Jazz, but it can’t be about you all the time, I know I should have stayed…” He paused, I didn’t speak, I wasn’t angry anymore, I had the feeling he was actually just as annoyed at me as I was at him. Granted I did cut him off, blocked his email, changed my phone number, so I didn’t know he tried to get in contact, not that I would have listened at the time.

“Come on, lets go get some ice cream,” he said after I didn’t speak.

“Are you paying?” I asked hopefully trying to lighten the mood.

“Well I did promise you lunch…”

I grinned.

“It’s good to have you back Jessizzle!” He said wrapping one of his arms round my waist casually.

“Who said you have me back?” I laughed, and let him lead me back out to the car, I got my phone out and sent Faith a quick thank you message.

“So what are we having?” Rian asked when we entered the ice cream parlour.

“Duh, chocolate fudge sundae,” I replied, as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

“How could I forget,” Rian laughed. We ordered our ice cream then sat down at the only free table, there were kids running up and down the shop, but I ignored them.

“Urgh, I feel sick…” I said pushing my ice cream away, I’d only managed to eat half of it.

“No way! Jess do you remember we used to come in here every Sunday for these, and you always finished it!” Rian said with a laugh.

“Yeah well my stomach can’t handle it now,” I replied smiling.

“Well mine can!” Rian shoved a huge spoonful of his into his mouth.

“Your stomach can handle anything,” I relied rolling my eyes.

“Not everything, few weeks back Zack and I ate two whole pizzas each… man I was suffering after that, haven’t had pizza since, don’t think Zack has either,” he said then licked his lips and sighed.

“I fancy some pizza!”

“Noooooo!” Rian looked like he might actually be sick.

I laughed. “So when are your friends coming then?”

“Day after tomorrow, I hope you don’t mind, they are all dying to meet you.”

“Oh… why?”

“Well I kinda talk about you a lot,” Rian said blushing.

I felt guilty again, if anything I went out of my way to make sure I didn’t talk about him. I think Rian misunderstood my guilty look because he laughed.

“Don’t worry, they are all really eager to meet you!”

“Do you think I’ll like them?” I asked.

“Fuck yeah, they are awesome!” He replied proudly.

“Alright, lets go,” I replied standing up.

“Lets go back to yours and catch up, I have a feeling we have lots to tell each other.”

I smiled and nodded, we did really, but I secretly hoped I could sneak away for a bit to look up All Time Low, because while I knew their names and a few songs they played on the radio, I knew nothing else. And funny, I didn’t want to let Rian down.