I'll Keep You Alive Inside

Aaron meets the girl of his dreams...

It had all started with the dreams. It always did for him. The first time Aaron saw her was in a dream, crafted of more than mere flesh and bone; something surreal and beautiful. She smiled softly and beckoned him closer, soft pink lips curving and pale fingertips flashing in his view. Her multicoloured eyes were dark that first night, and he couldn’t tell what colour they were. Her dark hair hung loose and free down past her shoulders.

He had warily stepped closer, rewarded by a slight nod on her part. As he took another step, she suddenly whirled and spread her arms in front of him in a protective gesture. What was she protecting him from? He didn’t see. All he saw was the bloody knife tip coming out of her back, at a higher angle from where it had entered her stomach. She fell backwards, tears running silently from her eyes from the shock and pain.

But she was silent. Aaron had tried to run towards her, do something, but everything faded away and he was left to sit up suddenly in his bed covered in a cold sweat and trying to forget her. He could not stand remembering a dream like that.

But one thing was imprinted in his mind; the love in her eyes. For him. She loved him, and he didn’t even know who she was. Then he remembered - she wasn’t real.

X

The next day, Aaron threw himself into his schoolwork, successfully distracting himself from the sight of the girl dying. He tried to go about his normal life, forget her, and carry on like normal. But somehow this had been the worst nightmare he’d had in a very long time.

It was more than two weeks later when he saw her again. She wore the same thing; a soft white dress of a slightly flattering cut and bare feet. They were in a garden this time, an old fashioned one with stone gargoyles guarding the corners. She held one hand out to him in a request to close their distance, but he shook his head stubbornly. Last time he had come closer, she had died.

She tilted her head in confusion, her eyes filled with the pain of his rejection. The question was clear on her face – why didn’t he want her?

He felt his face lose its blank mask as he tried to explain. He was protecting her. He didn’t want her to get hurt because of him. Aaron managed three steps closer before a gargoyle moved and wrapped great clawed hands around her neck, slowly suffocating her. Her lips flushed dark pink before they turned blue.

X

He refused to sleep. If he didn’t sleep, he would not dream. Simple. Aaron would not watch her die again. His friends noticed something was wrong, his absence in conversations and blank face. One time he was caught with a half finished drawing of her face; it captivated him, along with her beautiful eyes. They were green.

It was a week and a half before he finally couldn’t help himself and ended up blacking out on his bed, exhausted. It had been a long time coming. This time he was standing before an ocean, the sky a deep bruised purple. It made the waves look a deep, deep blue. She was standing with her back to him, and did not turn. But she knew Aaron was there. He could feel her smile, felt the soft comfort of it.

He walked very slowly, a hesitant step at a time, realising he was barefoot, like her. He was wearing jeans rolled to his knees and a black hoodie, normal clothing for him. She wore that same white dress, swirling around her in waves of pristine cloth.

His heart nearly stopped when he reached her side. This was the closest he had ever gotten to her. The other two times, she had died in front of him… He thought his mind, and heart, would break if he ever saw it again.

She turned to him, smiled gently, and brushed her fingers across his cheek, exploring his face as his eyes explored hers. Aaron’s heartbeat picked up again at the sight of her eyes; they were breathtaking up close. A mix of dark moss green, subtle gold and spikes of orange captivated him completely.

Just as he thought he might be able to get closer, she stepped back and away from him. For the first time ever, she spoke to him. Her voice was clear and quiet, and the sound suited her perfectly.

“You don’t need to save me, Aaron. I’m only dying in your dreams.”

And she walked out into the surf, leaving him frozen in place and struggling to save her.

XX