A Ballad For Beulah

It was very early June. Within the first couple of days of the sixth month and it was just a random day in which Mike was off spending the day with Estelle in the city, taking her shopping and out to a movie later in the evening. That left Beulah home alone with Bailey while she attempted to do her best at cleaning most of the house with her five-month and some change pregnant self.

The better part of the morning was rather monotonous and uneventful, but she got almost everything on her 'list' done.

That is, until the doorbell rang throughout the house sometime after noon.

Sighing nonchalantly to herself as she trudged from the kitchen to the front hall, she peered through the peep hole and her breath got caught in her throat.

Pulling the door open, she licked her lower lip subconsciously and was sure her face turned a shade of pink as her heartbeat quickened from nerves.

"Hey."

It was Billie Joe.

He was standing there, on the other side of the threshold, with one hand stuffed in his pocket and the other holding his car keys, which dangled aimlessly from between his thumb and index finger.

"Uh...hi," Beulah replied. "Are you here to see Mike or Bailey?"

"Both," he answered.

"Oh, well...Mike's not here. He took Estelle out for a father-daughter bonding day thing..." she began to explain as she kept a hand on the doorknob, turning it back and forth, shyly. "But, um, Bailey's watching a DVD in the living room, if you wanna come in..."

Billie Joe nodded. "Yeah. Thanks."

As Beulah stepped aside for him to enter, Billie Joe stole a glimpse of her stomach that was protruding considerably now. And for an instant, he wondered if this was just how she looked when she was pregnant with Bailey. He'd never seen pictures of her from that time, and he'd never even bothered to ask either.

The two of them walking side by side after she shut the front door, they stepped out of the front hall and into the kitchen, making their way toward the living room where the sounds of Monsters, Inc., along with Bailey's occasional giggles, were evident.

Billie Joe watched the corners of Beulah's mouth twitch slightly as she stepped away from him and moved closer to the fridge.

"Want anything to eat or drink? I could whip up somethi--"

"I'm fine," he cut her off with a shake of his head, while setting his car keys down on the kitchen island.

"Oh, okay, well...um...Bailey's in there and...I'll just be in here...cleaning."

It was obvious she was trying to avoid any eye contact with him, and even though he'd been guilty of the same in the past couple of months, he'd only done it when there was other people in the room. When it was just the two of them, he'd look her in the eye.

"Okay," he nodded. Then, "How you feelin'?" he questioned, gesturing to her stomach. "Still pregnant, I see."

She allowed herself to smile a little as she lifted her blue eyes to finally meet his green ones, and it was like she was staring at an older version of her son.

"Yeah. That I am."

"Um..." Billie Joe began lamely. "Why don't you come into the living room, too. I'm guessing you've been running around the house all morning. And you shouldn't be on your feet too much right now anyway."

Beulah shrugged. "I'm fine."

"You positive?"

She nodded. "Yep. Go on and spend some one-on-one time watching cartoons with your son," she insisted.

Without going about nodding or even saying anything further, Billie Joe turned and headed into the living room where he stepped around the back of the couch and placed his hands on his son's shoulders, surprising the five-year-old.

"Daddy!"

"Hey, honey," Billie Joe grinned as he walked around and sat down beside his son.

While father and son were doing their thing, Beulah helped herself to a glass of milk and sat down at the kitchen table, flipping through an issue of People she'd bought a few days earlier and hadn't gotten around to looking at.

However, her mind was so racked with thoughts that she couldn't concentrate on this issue's Picks & Pans section. And she wasn't even sure how long she just sat there, staring blankly at the same page and not absorbing any of it.

All she knew was that suddenly there was an extra presence in the room.

Looking up, she found Billie Joe standing beside her, a smirk on his face as he met her gaze.

"Wow, you're like...really engrossed with that certain page, aren'tcha?"

Beulah blushed. "Oh. Uh...how long were you staring?"

"Well...maybe about five minutes from over there in the archway, and only about twenty seconds standing right here. Give or take." He pulled out a chair next to her and plopped down, which surprised her some. "I finished watching Monsters, Inc. with Bailey but then he wanted to watch it again and, I don't know about you, but once is enough for me. I can only take Disney films once at a pop."

Smiling, she nodded in agreement. "Welcome to my world."

Their eyes continued to lock until a sense of awkwardness settled in and they both looked away.

"He's really getting big," Billie Joe commented.

"Yeah. I still can't believe he's five."

"And gonna be in kindergarten this fall," he added.

"Oh, I know. And just when he leaves home, so to speak, I'll be having another to take care of."

The green eyed guitarist nodded his head lamely. "Yeah, uh...so...did you and Mike ever go to find out what the baby is?"

Beulah shook her head. "Nah. We're gonna be surprised. You?"

"Same," he answered. "Adrienne doesn't want to know, even though she's dying to have a little girl. I mean, I'm sure there's only so much she can deal with in a house full of testosterone."

"I dunno," Beulah remarked with an impish shrug. "She seems to think you're more of a diva than your average woman can be."

"She said that--" Billie Joe began, then laughed. "Well, yeah, okay. So I guess that's true. Doesn't mean my wife and my...uh, you...hafta be talking about it behind my back," he tried to joke, but it once again became awkward.

And suddenly, Beulah didn't feel shy.

She straightened her posture and lifted her head a little more, however biting her lip, but only slightly, as she leaned forward, pushed the magazine out of her way and looked at him.

"Your what?" she egged on.

"Huh?" he wondered, a little confused.

"Your wife and your what? What am I to you anymore?"

She watched as he swallowed back a lump in his throat and looked down at his hand which was making circles on the tabletop. "You're...a great woman, Bee," he responded after moments of hesitation. "You dealt with so much shit I did and didn't do, and you're still strong because of it."

"Barely," she mumbled. "But what am I to you?" she pestered. "You started to say something. 'Your' what?"

"Why is it so important?" he inquired with narrowing eyes.

"Because I'd like to know where I stand with you."

He didn't know how to reply, and he sure as hell didn't know how to even form a thought about that. So, he shrugged.

"I used to think that maybe you were just my mistress. My other woman. But the more I thought about it, the more degrading it sounded in my head. And I honestly don't want to do that."

"A little late."

"I know," he muttered sheepishly.

"Did you ever feel an ounce of love for me? Not just sexually?"

Without hesitation, Billie Joe nodded. "Yes."

He lifted his eyes and locked his gaze on hers.

"In a perfect world, how would I have fit in to your life?"

"When did this become 20 Questions?"

Beulah sighed. "Just answer them, Billie."

His gaze unwavering, Billie Joe leaned forward, his hands now folded between his knees as his green eyes shifted back and forth from her right eye, to her left, and back again. Several times.

"In a perfect world," he started. "Polygamy would be legal. And I may've married you."

This answer honestly shocked Beulah. She hadn't expected him to answer like that at all.

"Really?"

"Really," he repeated.

Nibbling on her bottom lip, Beulah's chest rose and fell with every breath she took, trying to decided how to respond. And then, before she could even think, she leaned forward and kissed him.

Beulah had initiated a kiss between her and Billie Joe.

It took a moment for the punk rocker to even realize what was going on because he was so caught off guard by the gesture, so that when it finally sunk in, he pulled back and broke the kiss.

However, before he let her embarrassment wash over her for acting so rashly, Billie Joe placed his hands on either side of her face and kissed her back, his tongue slipping past her lips ever so briefly.

Now, it wasn't the kind of kiss that made her whole body tingle and her toes curl. It didn't make her weak in the knees and make her melt. But it made her feel a ball of excitement that burned at the pit of her stomach.

Sharing that ball, Billie Joe hooked his hands under her arms and pulled her off her chair and closer to him; his lips battling for dominance over hers. He opened his eyes briefly, seeing hers and how they remained closed.

They may have kept on kissing had it not been for the front door opening and closing, followed by Mike's voice calling out, announcing that he was home.

In a matter of an instant, Beulah had pulled herself away and sank back into her chair as she clamored to grab for her magazine; her guilt over what she'd done hitting her like a sack of hammers. Billie Joe placed his fingers to his mouth to wipe away any trace of the kiss and crossed his leg to hide the beginnings of his arousal just as Mike stepped into the kitchen. He smiled at both his girlfriend and his best friend, seeing them sitting together at the table.

"I thought I saw your car in the driveway, but I wasn't sure if it was you or Adrienne that was here," Mike commented as he walked closer toward the table.

"Yeah, sometimes Adi and I share the BMW. But if I'd had my Fairlane, you'd known it was me for sure," Billie Joe replied.

Feeling a little awkward about what Billie and her knew but not Mike, Beulah licked her upper lip and turned her attention to her boyfriend. "So, how was shopping and the movie with Estelle?" she inquired, changing the subject.

"Shopping was great, as usual, but we didn't see a movie, because clearly Stella's too old to see a movie with her dear old dad."

Beulah smirked. "You're not old."

"To her, I'm ancient. Granted, she's only nine and, to a nine-year-old, twenty's middle-aged," he remarked with a laugh, stepping over to Beulah and leaning forward to kiss her. "How was your day, babe?"

"Good," she answered.

Glancing at the magazine in her hands, Mike narrowed his eyes. "Your magazine's upside down."

"What? Oh." She straightened out the magazine and plopped it onto the table. "Billie and I were talking and I guess my hands got a little fidgety." Pulling herself up to her feet, Beulah stood up beside Mike and touched his hand with hers. "I'm just gonna start dinner, okay?"

Mike's gaze followed after her as she made her way over to the fridge. "What're you gonna make?"

"Chicken quesadillas."

"Unh," Mike groaned. "You're already making my mouth water." Looking down at Billie Joe, who was staring at his lap, the long-legged bassist tapped his friend on the shoulder. "You wanna stay for dinner?"

Billie Joe looked up, and began to stand. "Uh...nah. I think I'm just gonna head home. See what Adi's gonna be making."

"Oh, c'mon. I'm sure Bailey'd love having his father have dinner with him."

Averting his gaze from Mike and over in the direction of Beulah, Billie Joe nodded. "Alright. I'll stay for dinner," he replied after mild hesitation. Then added, "For Bailey."

* * *

Dinner went surprisingly well, considering the guilty pair sitting across from each other who were back to avoiding each other's eyes once again. But for Mike, that wasn't anything new. He knew how awkward the duo felt being around each other so he didn't bother to question it, but he also knew that they'd have to get used to it eventually.

And then dessert was served, wherein Beulah scooped out bowls of chocolate ice cream for everyone, despite Mike's protestations that she should be sitting down and he should be doing this.

She insisted otherwise, telling him it kept her busy. Because aside from playing mom to Bailey, girlfriend to Mike and having the occasional coffee klatch and whatnot with Adrienne, pursuing her photography interest and baking were things she enjoyed doing herself.

Plus it gave her those few moments, a few feet away from Billie Joe to gather her wits.

She didn't say much of anything to Billie Joe for the remainder of the evening until he left, when she said goodbye, and even then it was a short talk that was focused on Bailey and his next visit that perhaps he could somehow manage to actually go out with their son.

And despite the confusion for how she felt for everything, the one thing she was sure of was her son's newfound, developing relationship with his father. And it was evident that Bailey had forgiven Billie Joe and in fact loved him by the smile on his face, the twinkle in his bright green eyes and the way he hugged Billie Joe and kissed him without feeling like he had to, but because he wanted to.

That was all that would ever truly matter in her eyes.

* * *

Later that night, as Beulah and Mike lay in bed together, she couldn't help but smile to herself while she laid her head on his shoulder and drew circles on his chest with her fingers. And despite how guilty she still felt deep inside, and how confused as well, she was glad to know how much Mike loved her by the simple kiss he placed to her forehead when he turned to look at her.

"I love you," he whispered softly.

Looking down at her fingers, she stopping moving them and stretched her arm out around his waist and buried her face more into his chest.

"I love you, too," she answered just as quietly, while biting her bottom lip nervously.

* * *

Many a street away, still in the Berkeley area, Billie rolled off of his wife with a satiated huff as he turned onto his side. Adrienne shifted beside him and curled up against his back that was to her and ran her hand up and down his bare arm, but he kind of just shook it off.

"Mmm..." he groaned lightly.

Frowning, she pulled away from his and laid back against the mattress; her head sinking into her pillow.

"Nevermind. Just lay there like a lump," she muttered, turning onto her side so that the two of them had their backs to each other now.

Hearing the bitter tone in Adrienne's voice, Billie Joe lifted his head and turned it to glance over his shoulder at her. "Babe, I'm not trying to--"

"G'night, Billie."

He face falling, the five foot six guitarist laid back down and faced the way he'd been looking.

"G'night."