How Long Will I Be Waiting?
I can't pretend I don't care
I heard you're doin' okay
But I want you to know
I'm addic-
I'm addicted to you
I leaned up against the wall. Pressing harder to keep myself from falling on the floor. Drunk, again. Nothing big as anything else in my life. Some habits I will never change as for Marcus. He would never change his ways of calling me up at 2 in the morning for me to come be his midnight lay, becoming the same notch under his belt. It was disgusting. Nasty. Repulsive! Yet, every other night, after drinking alone, crying my eyes out over him to finally get a call saying he wants me to come over and "talk".
I can't pretend I don't care
When you don't think about me
Do you think I deserve this?
I try to make you happy
But you left anyway
"Nope. Not tonight" I slurred trying to talk myself into believe I wouldn't really answer his phone call. But I knew the truth. Deep down inside. The second that phone rang and the caller ID said Marcus I knew it would be over for the fact I would flip open the phone realizing to late that I had just answered his phone call. Now I could hang up but that would leave him to come to my house and bang on my door until I would open up and face him.
I'm tryin' to forget
But I'm addicted to you
But I wanted
And I needed
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never
Want to do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
How this started? God. I can't really remember details, only the gist. This all started in College, we were working at the same cafe during first semester, him on lattes and me? I was the cashier. The cafe shop we worked at was forever packed and understaffed. Marcus and us got along well and worked very fast as a team. Always the ladies man to. Making sly little flirty comments on how I made the apron look sexy. Smiling and winking. One day as we closed up shop late one night, we decided to make coffee and sit down just to talk. Well at least it started with coffee and talking, then to hitting up the local bar to my dorm room.
Since the day I met you
And after all we've been through
Still addic-
I'm addicted to you
I think you know that it's true
It was strange after that. We dated for a year or two. Didn't work out as much but we became very close. I realized to late that I had loved him although it was not vise versa. I feel harder and harder each time we hung out. He would call me his best friend all through out college. But after we graduated, something huge happened with a lot of the people he would hang out with in college and all the relationships he had never seemed to fill him. Marcus would some how always came back to me. To talk. Nothing more nothing less.
I'd run a thousand miles to get to you
Do you think I deserve this
I tried to make you happy
I did all that I could
Just to treat you good in every way
After two years went by of Marcus' failing relationships and no one to really talk to, or understand him, he came to me. I was drunk off my ass finally figuring out I should just give up on him forever, because he wasn't worth it, and here he was. In front of me. Wanting to me to just hold him.
I'm tryin' to forget
But I'm addicted to you
But I wanted
And I needed
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never
Want to do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
From that night on, almost three years ago, he would call me up about 3 times a week for a "talk". If a date went back. "Talk". If no one was understanding him and he wanted someone to hold him. He would call me up. I was always his last resort. But I wanted more, each night I would drink a little more hoping he wouldn't come for me just to feel warmth, but to really want me for me. Was it too much? Why did he need me?
How long will I be waiting
Till the end of time
I don't know why I'm still waiting
I can't make you mine
I've asked him before why did he always want me, but he never would respond to me in a straight manor. Marcus would explain it like he was dogging bullets. I was already accustumed to it and felt if he wanted to tell me why he was doing this he would. Even if we "talked" we were still very close. Having lunch the next day or going to a family gathering together. It was like nothing out of the ordinary. A behind close doors secret.
I'm trying to forget
But I'm addicted to you
But I wanted
And I needed
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never
Want to do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Tonight though. Oh tonight. I am going to drink myself to sleep and make sure I do not get his call. I want to feel warmth by somebody who wasn't just my friend but who loved me. Tonight will be the night I will be the warmth for myself. I will need no one and want no one.
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
But I want you to know
I'm addic-
I'm addicted to you
I leaned up against the wall. Pressing harder to keep myself from falling on the floor. Drunk, again. Nothing big as anything else in my life. Some habits I will never change as for Marcus. He would never change his ways of calling me up at 2 in the morning for me to come be his midnight lay, becoming the same notch under his belt. It was disgusting. Nasty. Repulsive! Yet, every other night, after drinking alone, crying my eyes out over him to finally get a call saying he wants me to come over and "talk".
I can't pretend I don't care
When you don't think about me
Do you think I deserve this?
I try to make you happy
But you left anyway
"Nope. Not tonight" I slurred trying to talk myself into believe I wouldn't really answer his phone call. But I knew the truth. Deep down inside. The second that phone rang and the caller ID said Marcus I knew it would be over for the fact I would flip open the phone realizing to late that I had just answered his phone call. Now I could hang up but that would leave him to come to my house and bang on my door until I would open up and face him.
I'm tryin' to forget
But I'm addicted to you
But I wanted
And I needed
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never
Want to do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
How this started? God. I can't really remember details, only the gist. This all started in College, we were working at the same cafe during first semester, him on lattes and me? I was the cashier. The cafe shop we worked at was forever packed and understaffed. Marcus and us got along well and worked very fast as a team. Always the ladies man to. Making sly little flirty comments on how I made the apron look sexy. Smiling and winking. One day as we closed up shop late one night, we decided to make coffee and sit down just to talk. Well at least it started with coffee and talking, then to hitting up the local bar to my dorm room.
Since the day I met you
And after all we've been through
Still addic-
I'm addicted to you
I think you know that it's true
It was strange after that. We dated for a year or two. Didn't work out as much but we became very close. I realized to late that I had loved him although it was not vise versa. I feel harder and harder each time we hung out. He would call me his best friend all through out college. But after we graduated, something huge happened with a lot of the people he would hang out with in college and all the relationships he had never seemed to fill him. Marcus would some how always came back to me. To talk. Nothing more nothing less.
I'd run a thousand miles to get to you
Do you think I deserve this
I tried to make you happy
I did all that I could
Just to treat you good in every way
After two years went by of Marcus' failing relationships and no one to really talk to, or understand him, he came to me. I was drunk off my ass finally figuring out I should just give up on him forever, because he wasn't worth it, and here he was. In front of me. Wanting to me to just hold him.
I'm tryin' to forget
But I'm addicted to you
But I wanted
And I needed
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never
Want to do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
From that night on, almost three years ago, he would call me up about 3 times a week for a "talk". If a date went back. "Talk". If no one was understanding him and he wanted someone to hold him. He would call me up. I was always his last resort. But I wanted more, each night I would drink a little more hoping he wouldn't come for me just to feel warmth, but to really want me for me. Was it too much? Why did he need me?
How long will I be waiting
Till the end of time
I don't know why I'm still waiting
I can't make you mine
I've asked him before why did he always want me, but he never would respond to me in a straight manor. Marcus would explain it like he was dogging bullets. I was already accustumed to it and felt if he wanted to tell me why he was doing this he would. Even if we "talked" we were still very close. Having lunch the next day or going to a family gathering together. It was like nothing out of the ordinary. A behind close doors secret.
I'm trying to forget
But I'm addicted to you
But I wanted
And I needed
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never
Want to do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Tonight though. Oh tonight. I am going to drink myself to sleep and make sure I do not get his call. I want to feel warmth by somebody who wasn't just my friend but who loved me. Tonight will be the night I will be the warmth for myself. I will need no one and want no one.
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker