Poprocks and Coke: If I Can't Have Both, Which Do I Choose?

Billie put down the guitar and looked at you as if you were the best thing ever.

You stared back at him; I can't believe it. I don't know what to say.

Billie smiled at your reaction to what happened; you couldn't help but smile back at him.

"What did you think?" he asked, trying to break the silence.

You opened and closed your mouth a few times.

"Uh...uh..." you tried to find the right words, but they couldn't seem to come to you.

He laughed; "Good to know you like it," he smiled; you smiled back but your smile quickly disappeared,

"Billie, why did you write that for me?" you asked, a little confused.

"Why do you want to know? Didn't you like it?" he looked down.

"No, Billie, I loved it... but no one has ever done that for me before... I don't know how to react," you scooted closer to him.

He looked back up at you, "It's okay," he stared into your eyes, "I wrote it because I felt something strong between us."

"Do you still?" you asked.

He nodded.

I like him too, but I don't know if I should be in a relationship with him. I just feel like it's not a good thing to be involved with him, at least, not right now. It's odd, but it feels like I'm being held back from something, but maybe I should just go for it... What do I say?

"It looks like it's going to rain," you said as you looked out the window.

You moron, don't say that, stupid! I totally just blew this...

Billie raised his eyebrows before slowly looking out the window and then back at you; "Well, since its going to 'rain', I think I should get going," he finger quoted 'rain'.

You looked down, "Sorry..."

"It's okay... I can see why you're feeling like this," he put his arm around your shoulders and you looked back up at him; "But... just so I know, how do you feel about me?" he hesitated to ask.

"I really don't know," you looked down.

Why is it so hard for me to confess my actual feelings?

"Nikki, please tell me," he whispered, "I know you know how you feel."

There was a moment of silence - more like a decade of silence - at least that's how long it felt to you.

You continued to look down as you tried to put all your thoughts together into words.

You felt Billie's eyes staring at you as you tried to gather your thoughts.

"I think... I think I love you," he whispered into your ear.

You jumped up from the bed and stared at him with wide eyes.

What did he just say? He loves me? Oh my God! What do I do? What do I say?

"What?" was the only thing you could say.

Billie smacked himself on the head as if he was scared that he frightened you. He got up and walked toward you.

"I love you," he said a little over a whisper.

You didn't know what to say.

This was way too unexpected.

"Billie, why?" you asked as you tried to bring yourself back into reality.

"I love everything about you; you're funny, smart, and fun to be around. I don't know. It's just how I feel," he said while looking straight into your eyes.

"Billie... I..."

You got cut off by the phone ringing.

"... got to get that."

Before you left the room, you heard Billie sigh in annoyance.

He followed you down the stairs into the kitchen.

You picked up the phone, "Hello?"

"Hi, Nikki."

Mom! Thank God you called! Remember when I was thirteen and you said we needed to talk about boys and I said, 'Ew. I'm not ready, mom.'? Well, I'm ready now. Help.

"Oh, hey mom."

"He's going to be fine," she sighed relieving.

Huh? Who?

KYLE!

"Thank God," you smiled as you felt a weight lift off your shoulders.

"The Doctors said that it's incredible that he made it," she said.

That's so stress-relieving.

"When will you be home?"

"In a few day, maybe a week."

"Okay. Tell him I love him."

"I will."

"Bye, mom."

"Bye, Nik."

You hung up the phone.

"Your brother's okay?" Billie smiled.

"Yes. Oh my God, Billie, I'm so happy!"

You walked up to him and he put you into a hug. You definitely forgot about the conversation that the both of you just had two minutes ago and just hugged him back.

Billie smells so good, and he's so sweet to me. No other man like him.

That's when it hit you; you do like Billie... a lot. As you thought about it, you felt Billie press his lips on the side of your neck.

You looked up at him.

You were stunned that he just kissed you.

He grabbed your lips with his and put you into the most sweetest kiss you had ever felt.

Billie let go of the kiss first even though you didn't want him to. When he did, the both of you were still in each others arms, holding each other, and staring into each others eyes.

"So... um... the conversation we had..." Billie started.

"Let's forget about it, okay?" you cut him off; "I'm stupid to deny my true feelings for you," you smiled; he smiled back.

"I'm so glad you said that," he said before he grabbed your lips again.

You kissed him back as you wrapped your arms behind his back to deepen the kiss. As you were kissing he picked you up in excitement to deepen the kiss.

The kiss finally ended after about a few glorious seconds.

You were still shocked and surprised about the effects the kiss had on you. That was the best kiss ever.

There was a silence as Billie and you tried to get back into reality.

"You're a really good kisser," you told him.

He smiled; "Why, thank you. You're pretty good yourself."

At that moment, both Billie and you saw a bolt of lightening through the window and heard an outburst of thunder, and then came the tiny raindrops that started hitting the window.

"See; told you it was going to rain," you grinned proudly,

Billie laughed.

More thunder came; you were startled by it and jumped a little.

"Aw. Scared of a little thunder?" Billie asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"No... I just didn't expect it... Jerk," you smiled at the last part.

"Sure," he smiled; you smile too; "Do you want the big and strong Billie to protect you tonight?" he asked, sounding like a superhero.

"Okay... Where is this big and strong Billie?" you joked as you looked around the room.

"Funny," Billie laughed sarcastically.

"I thought so myself," you smiled.

For a moment, Billie got caught up in your gaze again.

This time, instead of just standing there staring into his eyes, you surprised him by grabbing a hold of his lips with yours.

When you pulled away, you knew it was real. Feelings started to over come you, and you knew it was him...

"I love you."

I felt butterflies flying around in my stomach after I said 'I love you'. They weren't the usual butterflies I would feel in my stomach; these ones felt different... as if each butterfly had one wing that was fluttering around with love and excitement while the other wing was broken and in pain...