Our Disappointed Hearts

The girl from the wall, her name was Vada? I wasn't sure if I had ever heard that name before but it was fucking weird.

I couldn't do it and I tried refusing but her mother wouldn't take it.

“No, no no no no. I wont let you refuse, you asked for a ride, now you've got one.” she said to my disappointment.

I scowled at Vada and shut my eyes tight in frustration. They were hidden by my large black shades, of course.

I followed the girl from the wall hastily to her car like I was going to get executed. She kept looking back at me, like she was inspecting me. Probably checking to see if I had pulled out a weapon or something. She seemed the type.

We both sat in the car. She put on her seat belt and I guess she was waiting for me to do the same.

"Uhm," she cleared her throat in and it annoyed me, "Can you put your seat belt on please?"

My eyebrows raised at her request. I could have laughed but didn't have the energy.

I sat there for a minute waiting for her to tell me she was kidding but instead she just looked at me expectantly. I grunted and finally buckled up.

We drove, she kept asking me for directions every few seconds. She always seemed so nervous and I didn't give a shit why.

Once we pulled on to my street, I heard sirens and saw flashing lights. They were most likely searching my house and finding terrible things.

"Fuck. Guess the park bench is home tonight." I groaned and sank in my seat.

"Wait here a second," Vada said as she left the car. "I'll be right back." she called back at me as she was walking.

I found her arrogance rather irking. She hasn't even known me for that long and she already thinks this is her business. I'm probably something she can tell her fake friends of, like a charity case or something.

I waited for her to get back and almost cried. I have no idea what caused this but a wave of depression briefly swept over me. Luckily, it was only for a few seconds and then I felt nothing.
"Fuck, fuck, this stupid shit..I can't believe this bullshit." I muttered under my breath and pulled at my hair.

"I'm going to find you somewhere to stay." she whispered for some odd reason.

She went outside again and I heard her talking to someone faintly through the car's captivity.

I felt a tear prick at my eyes and I took my glasses off and let my face fall into my hands. I began to weep a little but managed to drag myself out of it. I felt a door slam, and a warm presence next to me. I felt my surroundings move shortly after.

“Fuck, just drop me off at the park.” I laughed dryly between my fingers. "I didn't mean to turn you into a damn taxi." I sighed as I laughed out of hopelessness.

“No. I'm not taking you to the park.” She said to me, “I talked to my mom, and you're going to have a warm place to sleep tonight.”

I looked up from my hands and narrowed my eyes and looked at her.

“You're not dumping me off at some home or something, are you?” I said suspiciously.

“Nope. No home, you're old enough to manage to get out of that one, anyways.” She said.

I composed myself and got my bulky bag on my lap opposed to the floor and put my sunglasses in a side pocket.

"I'm taking you home with me." I stared at her hard, in disbelief, my mouth gaping open. I was not going to allow this.

“Every thing's fine. It's just for tonight, if you'd like...or until you find a place.” she said nervously.

I froze and let myself fall back into the seat.

"I can't." I spat at her. "I simply won't do it." I stated.

I started getting my things together, planning on hopping out whether she stopped or not. She saw me and stopped the car after letting out a sigh.

"Look," she said as I opened the passenger door. “You can get out if you want, but meanwhile, I'm offering you a warm bed and food,” She awaited my reaction, "it's cold as hell outside, you have one jacket from what I can tell, you have drugs somewhere, and you probably don't have much money on you. Or at all, for that matter. Sleep on a park bench and freeze your ass off all night and go hungry, or come and stay with me for awhile. It's up to you.” She made my plan sound like shit but I'd never let her know that.

I still had the door opened and I thought for a minute. I'm pretty sure that now that Sonny's gone, that I had no protection. I had higher risks of terrible things happening to me and I wasn't looking forward to the cold night ahead of me.

“Come on,” She said in a softer tone, “I don't want you to be alone on a park bench all night...” The care in her voice almost made me smile and it made me cave.

I slammed the car door and let out an exasperated sigh.

“Fine, whatever. It's only for tonight though. Tomorrow I'm gone.” I grunted.

She smiled and looked at me thankfully. I wanted to smile back but I knew it was probably a fake smile that she gave me. Like everyone else.

I closed my eyes and put my hands behind my head as we drove off and heard her giggle a bit.

"What the hell are you laughing for?" I said defensively.

"Nothing." she sat back, I could hear the smirk in her voice.

"Whatever. I don't have enough energy to question your bullshit." I sighed in frustration.

I closed my eyes again and began feeling my high again. It had downed quite a bit due to all of the events. The Xanax really didn't do much to me if I wasn't relaxed.

My body began to tingle and I felt calm for once. I smiled slightly at my state and knew I'd feel like this for a little bit longer.