Disasterpiece

I was down on my knees wiping underneath of the bar out, a mix of dust and old sticky alcohol blanketed the aging wood. Brandon was moving around me serving the few customers that hung around on a Friday afternoon; Uncle Frank was out the back doing budgets – I always found it funny watching him getting more and more flustered as he pulled out various tax and sales forms from the boxes piled up in the lunchroom corner. Suddenly a hand holding out a lemon appeared in front of me, I leaned back looking up at Brandon in confusion.

“What?” I asked, staring at him weirdly.

“Suck it,” he replied seriously, pushing the lemon towards my face; I knocked his hand away.

“Urgh no why?” I questioned, getting up off the floor I dusted my pants off and snatched the lemon out of his hand, putting it back in the basket behind the bar.

“Because you’ve been smiling like a loon since you got here,” he answered with a smirk, I rolled my eyes and turned my back on him – making my way over to the sink. Had I really been smiling? I hadn’t even noticed. I began to wash my hands when Brandon popped up next to me again, leaning on the bench casually. “So, who’s the lucky guy then?” he jeered playfully, my insides squirmed; I hadn’t even been thinking about Joey…I think. Had I? I had not been smiling!

“No one,” I replied quickly, turning away from him again and crossing the bar; I felt him hot on my tail though. “Brandon go away,” I whined, a regular indicated he wanted his usual with a raised finger so I began to pour it for him.

“I’ll get it out of you you know,” he said matter-of-factly. I slid the beer across the bar to the customer and turned to face Brandon with folded arms.

“And how do you presume to do that?” I asked him. At that moment Uncle Frank came waltzing in from the back stretching his arms out above his head. I clenched my lips up together when Brandon winked and turned towards him.

“Hey boss Vixen’s got a boyfriend,” he informed him; I gaped, beginning to splutter.

“I certainly do not!” I choked in outrage; if I did I wouldn’t be hiding it – especially if it was Joey, I don’t think I would have any problem revealing that. Who would? Uncle Frank let his arms drop and raised his eyebrow at me.

“Finally got with Corey’s mate then?” he asked; I huffed exasperated and spun back around to the bar; I could hear Brandon and Uncle Frank snigger behind me; assholes.

Later that night the bus pulled up to my stop, the bus driver winked at me as I passed, stepping into the chilly night. I pulled my hood up over my head, standing aimlessly as the bus pulled away from behind me. I drew in a deep breath, the crisp air filling my lungs; relaxing every limb as it escaped again through my lips. My eyes fell over to the ex-grave site routinely; I didn’t have any feelings towards it anymore but old habits die hard. I was just about to look away again, satisfied with the empty feeling; when something moved in the shadows by the willow. I stepped closer cautiously frowning, the shadow moved again, its long hair waving in the wind. Joey?

I walked closer, stopping on the other side of the fence next to him; he stood like a statue staring down at the empty grave. I felt a pang of guilt, like I should’ve done something to stop this situation; but what was this situation? Did he find the same comfort I once had here, or maybe he had been dwelling on her and this was the only place he could come to take silent revenge? I looked closer at his turned back, his hands were shoved into his pockets but he didn’t seem to be more bent over than usual, there were no silent sniffs emitting from him.

“Nicest part of this place don’t you think?” I quoted the first thing he ever said to me, breaking the silence. He twitched nervously, spinning around and grinning when he saw who it was.

“I do think,” he quoted back; we both looked at each other for a moment then chuckled. I rested casually on the fence as he walked forward.

“So what are you doing out here at this time of night?” I asked, it was usual for me working shift work – but for a rock star, a rock star not on tour – it seemed a strange time to be out. We’ll ignore that the place in usual circumstances is a weird place to be too – pretty sure we’ve established the normality there.

“I didn’t plan on coming here,” he replied with a shrug.

“Oh?” I asked with a raised brow. Joey smiled shaking his head; he looked up at the sky shoving his hands deeper into his pockets.

“I went to your house first but there was a lot of yelling coming from inside so I decided it was better not to knock on your door,” he replied, I stepped back from the fence; yelling was never good, worse when I wasn’t home to be part of the feud.

“I should probably go be a mediator then if Josie’s committing murder,” I said worriedly. Joey’s head snapped down from the sky.

“Oh, well let me walk you home then,” he offered, walking towards the cemetery gates before I had a chance to reply. We met up by the gates and began to walk next to each other slowly in the direction of my house. Do you ever have those situations where for the life of you, you can’t think of something to say? And you really want to say something interesting, but then time goes on and it gets to the point where you just wish you could say anything even if it is completely banal?

I was kind of having one of those moments right now, we were almost halfway to my house and still a silence barricaded itself between us. Joey stopped suddenly next to me; I walked a few paces without noticing before turning around in question. The look on Joey’s face was probably what mine would’ve looked like if I had taken Brandon’s lemon offer.

“Fuck,” he groaned, running his fingers through his hair.

“What’s wrong?” I asked fearfully, I suddenly felt a nervous sickness inside. Joey sighed; his foot lifted just slightly and stomped down.

“I can’t think of anything to say and it’s fucking pissing me off,” he explained in frustration. I giggled; it was funny that we were both walking silently together fighting internally with ourselves for something to say.

“Well I can’t think of anything either,” I offered lamely; there goes any wish to say something interesting.

“Well that doesn’t help me,” he replied, rolling his eyes playfully as he started to walk again.

“I didn’t say it would – but hey look this is kind of like a conversation,” I said, taking up my place again beside him.

“Yeah I guess,” he sighed; he seemed more bummed about our lack of speech than even me; I guess he was use to been around people with big personalities and endless amounts of things to say.

“Well…what were you doing knocking on my door anyways?” I asked the only thing that came to my head to keep the silence at bay; we rounded the corner, my house now in sight.

“I dunno really, just felt like doing something you know,” he shrugged indifferently.

“Aw and you wanted to do it with me?” I cooed playfully. Joey snorted comically, my eyes widened when I realised what I had said. “Ok I so did not mean it like that!” I babbled quickly, looking to the ground I could feel my face burning. We came to a stop at the end of my driveway, Joey turned to face me adjusting his stance a few times between his feet.

“So, next time I’ll call first I guess,” he said, I nodded daring to look up from the ground at him again.

“Ha yeah maybe…um I have tomorrow off if you feel like doing something then,” I told him; my nerves building up again as if they were shocked at the audacity I had to suggest to the Joey Jordison that we should spend time together. Joey opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by a loud slam; I jumped in surprise looking up at the house to find Daniel storming towards his car. A cold bad feeling washed over me.

“Hey I should go, call me if you want to catch up?” I said quickly to Joey.

“Ok, see you later then,” he replied. I smiled apologetically before running off towards Daniel, catching him just as he pulled open the car door.

“Daniel what’s wrong?” I gushed; he turned towards me sharply; even in the dim light I could see his eyes were bloodshot. I swallowed deeply; guessing that the yelling Joey had heard must’ve been coming from Josie and Daniel.

“Thanks for your advice and everything but you don’t know your friend as well as you think you do – actually I don’t think either of us know her as well as we think we do - did,” he said, I frowned in confusion.

“I don’t understand…” I replied quietly, my mind ticking slowly over everything he had said but not comprehending. He sighed, getting into the car.

“She said no ok?” he explained sadly; my heart sank; I stared at him in disbelief. Josie and Daniel had been happily together for years, the perfect couple in not just my eyes but everyone around them too. They were the kind of couple that other couples eye jealously; that the unhappy girlfriend in a relationship stares at wistfully as her boyfriend drones on about last night’s football game. And though sometimes you felt queasy been around them, there was always that envy deep down; even when you didn’t feel like been in a relationship. How can they not be together anymore? More importantly…how could she say no?!

“Oh Daniel,” I sighed regretfully; he shook his head, turning his car on.

“Save it please, I’ll see you around – or not,” he said, shutting his door I watched him reverse out of the driveway; his face barely containing the agony I could see building up inside. I bit my lip, making my way up into the house I found Josie sitting on the couch; knees drawn up to her chest – eyes red and puffy, more water falling from them by the second. I sat down next to her, unsure of what to say. I decided just to put my hand on her shoulder, she leant her head on my shoulder at my touch.

“Josie what the fuck did you do?” I sighed heavily, she sniffed.

“I have no idea,” she cried out quietly. This was going to be a long night.