Disasterpiece

I felt so plain (and short) walking next to Josie, she had certainly managed to achieve and exceed her ‘pretty’ expectations. I wore a pair of dark brown jeans, white shirt and black vest while she paraded in a short black dress, tan stockings and red heels; she towered over me even more than usual and probably had about three times more make up on.

The lift doors opened on the ground floor in front of us, we stepped out to find the rest of the guys ready and waiting. One at a time as they turned to face us, they gawked at Josie, Corey adding in a joking wolf whistle for effect. Josie blushed bashfully, doing a little curtsey and made her way over to Sid whose eyes looked like they were about to pop out of their sockets.

I felt uncomfortable and a little jealous to be honest when I made my way over to Corey and Joey. I gave Joey a small wave and smile which he reciprocated as Corey wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

“Let’s go fuckers,” he yelled. “Oh and fuckerettes,” he added, winking down at me. I rolled my eyes before being dragged forward into the chilly London street. It was still light outside because of ‘British Summer Time’ (which I had read about in a brochure in our hotel room), but it was still quite cold and overcast. The sound of car horns and the dying peek hour rush swarm around us. As we walked passersby stepped aside for us to pass, looks of weary tainted their over worked faces.

“Where are we going?” I asked Corey as we walked down the narrow, dirty sidewalk that was covered in pigeon excrement and remnants of gum.

“Hey Shaun where are we going?!” Corey yelled, throwing his head back in the air so Shaun (who was walking somewhere behind us) could hear. The way he said it sounded more like a cheerleading chant than a question though.

“Schnitzelhaus!” Shaun yelled back, a sing-song edge to his voice.

“Schnitzelhaus!” the rest of the guys suddenly yelled, then burst out laughing. I had to admit, I had to laugh too even though I wasn’t in on the joke, it was pretty funny hearing them all yell ‘Schnitzelhaus’.

“Did that answer your question?” Corey asked, ruffling my hair. I smacked his hands away and ducked out from under his arm, walking backwards in front of him.

“Oh yes, and it confirmed so many more,” I replied teasingly.

“Oh did it now?” Corey said, a wicked glint casting itself over his face, he began to pick up his walking pace.

“Corey,” I warned lowly, walking as fast as I could while going backwards.

“Corey!” I warned again when he continued to get faster, grinning evilly at me.

“Corey!!” I screamed, spinning around I started to run down the street – Corey cackling loudly as he chased me.

I wasn’t a very fast runner, but Corey was a heavy smoker so we had a level playing field. I made sure to pick up my feet as I ran so as not to trip on the uneven sidewalk. The whole time Corey was right behind me, just out of arms reach. I rounded a corner, sliding sideways on the footpath a little as I went – it was just enough time for Corey to come barrelling into me, grabbing me around the waist he hoisted me into the air, spinning around on the spot.

“Corey!” I laughed and gasped from lack of air at the same time.

“Say ‘Corey is the winner,’” he commanded, holding me up just high enough that my feet couldn’t touch the ground.

“Corey is the winner!” I wheezed out, my sides starting to hurt where he was holding me and my mouth hurting from smiling so much.

“And ‘Corey is a god we must all worship,’” Corey added.

“No!” I laughed.

“Say it!” he pushed, tightening his grip around me and moving his fingers around so they were tickling my ribs.

“Corey is a god we must all worship!” I yelled, caving in just as the rest of the group rounded the corner with faces of amusement. Corey put me down, satisfied. I rubbed my sore sides and grumbled “not!” under my breath.

“What was that?” Corey asked in amusement, going to grab me around the waist again. I quickly dodged him and ran behind Joey, holding tightly onto his shoulders and using him as my shield.

“I have your drummer and I’m not afraid to abuse him!” I yelled out to Corey, using my grip on Joey’s shoulders to turn him side to side. Suddenly someone came up behind me, wrapping their arms around my waist and locking them so I couldn’t move; they pulled me away from Joey and kept a strong hold as I squirmed.

“I have your sister and I’ll sell her to the highest bidder!” Josie yelled in my ear, I gaped at her audacity and tried harder to get out of her grip.

“I’ll give you ten bucks,” Corey offered with a smirk.

“Twenty bucks!” Joey interjected, getting into the moment jokingly.

“Sold to Joey!” Josie yelled quickly, letting go of me she placed her hands on the middle of my back and pushed me straight into Joey. “Here’s your slave for the night!” she told him happily, then skipped off to a waiting Sid. Joey caught me in his arms just before I fell, wrapping them around me tightly.

“Bargain,” Joey joked lightly, his face so close to mine that I could feel his warm breath on my cheek.

“Rip-off more like it,” I replied softly, he chuckled and let me go; a chill sensation replacing the feeling of his arms wrapped around me. I looked around to see the rest of the group dispersing and heading into a large wooden door a few feet up on the left.

“Shall we?” Joey asked, extending his arm out towards the others retreating backs.

“Oh I suppose so,” I replied, grinning. Joey and I followed the others into the restaurant, then up a flight of stairs into a private function room that Shaun had booked. It was gorgeously decorated inside, a theme of dark mahogany wood and tradition German patterns littered the sizeable room. In the middle of the room a long wooden table sat with about twelve chairs around it and a huge, frothing pitcher of beer before every seat, off to the corner there were couches, ornaments and a burning fire place. I followed Joey over to the table and sat between him and Paul, Corey and Shaun sat directly across from us.

“I would like to propose a toast!” Corey boomed over the various conversations going on around the table. When the conversations died down he lifted the beer in front of him high into the air, everyone else around the table doing the same thing.

“To a fucking great night, an epic tour, our friends and family that are here with us and all the rest that aren’t. We all know the new album fucking rocks so let’s get out there are show the world Slipknot will never fucking die!” Corey roared, his toast was met with cheers and yells of “Schnitzelhaus”. I toasted my heavy beer glass into the air and brought it to my lips carefully, only taking a small sip because I wasn’t the biggest fan of beer. This should make for an interesting night.

Dinner was a massive banquet with piles of meat, vegetables, beer and three different types of cake. I now sat back in my chair, slumped with my hands rested on my full belly in content listening to Joey and Paul bicker about some band I had never heard of and their integrity in the ‘scene’. The rest of the group were spread out around the room, a few random people who had invited themselves were thrown in the mix too. Josie and Sid sat on one of the couches together, deep in drunken conversation; I had been keeping my eye on them all night as they seemed to sit closer and closer to each other, sometimes falling onto each other in drunken stupor.

“Ok well your point is valid but I still disagree,” Pauls voice floated into my head, I looked to the side to see him standing up, taking out his phone. “I gotta call the misses now, be back later,” he said, ruffling my hair to my distain before he walked away. Joey took up his glass of coke, taking a long drink from it. I smiled weakly at him and nodded my head at his glass.

“Hitting the heavy stuff I see,” I joked, Joey smiled, putting his glass back on the table.

“Well the last time I was drunk a lot of things got broken, so I thought I better take it easy for a while,” he replied sheepishly, I nodded solemnly, remembering the night I had found Joey drunk at his house and then cleaning up his destroyed bedroom.

“So when’s your first gig then?” I asked, doing my best to change the subject without making it obvious.

“We’re doing a signing tomorrow and then the next day is the first show,” he answered, running his index finger mindlessly along the rim of his glass.

“Not a lot of time to perfect my super fantastic merch girl skills then,” I joked, flicking my hair falsely, making Joey laugh.

“What exactly are ‘super fantastic merch girl skills’?” he queried in interest, shifting himself to the edge of his seat, his grin having an edge of amusement.

“Well, they involve a cape of some sort...and sounding like an auctioneer with the ability to scream louder than any fan girl,” I explained, trying to keep my face as serious as possible. Joey snorted, raising his eyebrows.

“Fan girls scream pretty fucking loud,” he pointed out.

“Oh I know, I’ll have you know I use to be a screaming fan girl...once upon a very long time ago,” I informed him, folding my arms and my legs for effect.

“Oh, and who were you screaming over?” he asked, his voice and face showing that he was now very interested in our conversation and my answer, the only problem was there was no way I was giving him one.

“Hell no, I’m not going to tell you!” I laughed, shaking my head forcefully. Joey pouted and pulled his chair closer to mine.

“Come on; promise I’ll try not to laugh,” he pleaded, batting his eyelids for effect. Between the pout, big blue eyes and eyelids there was no way I could even contemplate saying no. Damn people with good looks on their side.

“Ah fine,” I relented, throwing my hands in the air. “But you’re going to think I’m super daggy.”

“That’s assuming I don’t already,” he corrected teasingly, grinning like an absolute fool as he did so.

“Joey!” I exclaimed, slapping him across the shoulder in fake offence. “I’m so not telling you now,” I added, turning away from him with a fake humph.

“Aw I was joking V come on,” Jokey wined, grabbing my shoulder he tugged trying to get me to turn around. I grinned to myself, but refused to turn around still...instead I looked around the now very empty room and noticed that a lot of people had left, including Sid and Josie.

“Hey where’d everyone go?” I asked Joey, turning around to face him, causing his hand to fall from my shoulder. He looked around briefly and shrugged.

“Back to the hotel to sleep?” he suggested then yawned accidently but with perfect timing, I laughed.

“Speaking of sleep...” I said, biting my lip.

“Yeah it sounds good...you wanna go?” he asked, I nodded so we both stood up, pushing our chairs back under the table. I looked around to see if Corey was still here and found him sitting on a couch in the corner with some random red head I’d never seen before – from the looks of it he was pulling all the best tricks out of his ‘Guide to a Lay’ memory bank. I rolled my eyes at him and left with Joey, guessing that saying good night wouldn’t be that important to Corey right now.

Outside it had finally gotten dark and it was extremely cold, I walked as close to Joey as I could without touching him, running my hands up and down my exposed arms for warmth. Joey seemed spaced out in his own world until he noticed how cold I was getting.

“My slave isn’t cold is she?” he asked cheekily. I stopped rubbing my arms and folded them as tightly as I could around my body instead.

“Technically I’m not your slave because you never paid Josie,” I pointed out, he thought about it for a second and shrugged.

“Oh well, I guess I have no responsibility to keep you warm then,” he said, picking up his walking pace a little bit, his long hair flying in perfect waves behind him.

“Well...you can still keep me warm just as a concerned friend,” I informed him apprehensively, quickly regretting saying it afterwards. Joey stopped and turned around in front of me, causing me to come to a halt as well.

“And what would a concerned friend do?” he questioned, my heart beat started to increase a little.

“Um...give me his jacket?” I suggested hopelessly, thinking of the most trivial thing I could.

“But he’s not wearing a jacket,” he said, raising his eyebrow. I ran my fingers through my hair, racking my brains for more ideas.

“Light a fire?” I tried stupidly.

“In the middle of a London street?” he laughed,

“If we were cave men we wouldn’t have this problem,” I pointed out, grumbling.

“That’s true...I could’ve just gone and skinned a lion for you,” he said

“Joey!” I whined in frustration, knowing that this conversation was going nowhere and just causing me to stand in the cold for longer than necessary. Joey just laughed and beckoned me towards him.

“Come here then,” he said, holding out his arm which was shaking just a little. I shifted my way slowly and cautiously towards him, nerves beginning to crawl over my skin. When I reached him he wrapped his arm around me, I almost choked on my own breath. We started walking again in silence, I felt his fingers twitching every now and then – but it was nothing compared to the inner spasms my body was going through.

I had to keep my mind in check as we walked because although I was nervous as hell, and now very warm, I felt so comfortable being this close to Joey...it felt ‘right’ if that makes sense. And that feeling kept causing my mind to slip into its own dream reality where Joey and I were actually together and he had his arm wrapped around me because of that. It’s so sappy and unrealistic, I know...but I can’t help the sap that drips from my mind every now and then.

We reached the hotel foyer, still in silence, and he let his arm drop from my shoulders slowly. We turned to face each other awkwardly, neither really knowing what to say after the extended silence that made everything just that little more uncomfortable.

“I'm going to ask the service desk something,” he said, nudging his thumb in the direction of the front desk.

“Ok well I’m just going to go to sleep now I’ll see you in the morning,” I replied, gnawing on the inside of my lip anxiously.

“Ok then, night,” he said, doing the trade mark awkward wave we had going on.

“Night,” I replied, waving back. Turning away from him and doing my best to resist the urge to look back, I made my way to the lifts and hit my head repeatedly, but lightly, against the mirror inside once the doors had closed. This just friend’s thing was really hard, even if I knew it was all Joey and I could ever be, unless these feelings went away soon I was going to drive myself insane.

When the doors opened I shuffled out and took the room key from my pocket, our room was only the second door up so I didn’t have far to go until I reached it. I also didn’t have far to go until I heard suspicious noises coming from inside. Stopping in my tracks from surprise, I listened carefully and heard the distinct sounds of a female moaning. Strangely enough, they sounded exactly like Josie when her and Daniel use to...well you know.

I crept up and put my ear against my door, confirming for myself that the noises were coming from inside. I knew I should’ve seen this coming, it was way too obvious right from the beginning, but I just never thought she would leave Daniel for someone else so quickly. Sighing heavily, I put my key back into my pocket and began to pace the hallway slowly. I couldn’t go to Corey’s room because I knew that girl he was with wasn’t going home tonight and I didn’t know any of the other guys well enough to ask if I could sleep in their room, well without it being weird and turning into something else.

I stopped pacing and went back over to the lifts, deciding to find a nice twenty-four hour fast food outlet that I could hang out in until morning. Just as I put my hand out to press the down button though, the lift opened and out walked Joey who looked extremely surprised to find me standing there.

“Where are you going?” he asked in confusion, cocking his head just a little. I looked between the lift and my hotel room, then sighed. If I had a feeling this was coming than I’m sure all the guys saw it too so Josie and Sid would not be able to keep it a secret for long.

“My room is in use at the moment,” I explained, Joey gave me a confused questioning look. I sighed again and pointed at the door. “Listen for yourself,” I told him. Joey walked towards the door but didn’t even need to get close before he heard the ruckus coming from inside.

“Oh,” he said.

“Yeah...” I replied. He turned towards me and did the whole cocking head thing once more.

“So where are you going?” he asked, I put my hands in my pockets and shifted nervously on the spot.

“Well Corey has a ‘friend’ over tonight so I just thought I’d go find a Mc Donald’s or something...they’re everywhere right?” I answered. Joey went silent for a bit, seeming to have not heard my reply as he glance back at his room in thought. I was about to say goodbye when he responded.

“You can stay in my room,” he blurted out; I think it startled both him and I. Yet again my heart beat began to quicken, I couldn’t even walk with his arm around my shoulders let alone sleep in the same room as him.

“Thanks Joey, but I can’t do that to you,” I said. He stepped forward a little, frowning.

“I promise I won’t do anything weird, we’re just friends remember? Corey would kill me if I let you stay out alone all night knowingly,” he tried to persuade me. I groaned internally, of course I wanted to stay in Joey’s room – who wouldn’t? But it would be so hard...but then he just reinforced the friend’s thing so it wouldn’t be weird...

“Um...” I pondered out loud.