Out for Blood: A Billie Joe Story

My father looks back down at me for a quick second before he rolls off and stands up.

"Mike, it's not what it looked like," he tries explaining. Mike crosses his arms over his chest.

"Really, Bill? Then what were you doing?" My father stays silent, so Mike slowly shakes his head. "You're a liar. You were gonna rape her with both Tre and me in the house. You honestly thought I wouldn't sit by the door to make sure you didn't try pulling anything?" My father looks at me and catches my tear filled eyes. He takes a deep breath.

"Ellie, go downstairs. I have to talk to Mike," he says.

"But this is my room," I say, not really paying much attention to what I'm saying.

"Go," he demands. I stand up and leave the room. I hear the door shut so I go back and sit against it.

"Mike, I can't do this anymore," my father says. The bed creaks, so someone must have sat down on it.

"What do you mean," Mike asks as the bed creaks again.

"I can't be around her like this anymore. I can't always be with her, because she's always so... inviting."

"How is she inviting? Like inviting you to what?"

"She's so gorgeous and innocent... it's like she wants me to fuck her so hard that it hurts her."

"You really get that much out of her just being in the same room with you?"

"Yeah," my father whispers. "Mike, I think I need to tell you the real reason Adie divorced me."

"You didn't hit her?" My father chuckles once, but without humour.

"I did, but she knew I was under a lot of stress, so she let it slide."

"Then what'd you do?" My father takes a deep breath.

"One night a few weeks before the divorce was final, I couldn't sleep. It was around the same time I started thinking about having sex with Ellie. I went to Joey's room to make sure he was asleep, and then went to Jake's room for the same reason. Me being the stupid bastard that I am, I went to Ellie's room. When I saw her sleeping so peacefully, I walked over to her bed and knelt down next to it. I ran my hand over her cheek really softly, and then down her neck and arm. My hand ran across her stomach and then, without knowing it, my hand stopped on the inner part of her upper thigh. Adie walked in and saw me."

"What'd she say," Mike asks quietly.

"She left the room. I followed her a few seconds later and she was waking the boys up. She got them in the car and when I tried explaining it to her, her exact words were 'I don't know what you were doing in her room, Billie Joe, and I don't what's going on between you two, but don't let me or the boys interfere.' "

"Why didn't you ever tell me before, Billie," Mike asks.

"I was still in shock over what she said ever since then. I just thought it was time you knew how long I've felt this way about Ellie."

"Does she even know you were in her room that night?"

"No, I don't want her to know. I've already done so much to her, I don't wanna scare her anymore."

"Bill," Mike says, "she's always gonna be afraid of you from now on, no matter what you do. You need to tell her." The bed creaks and I move over so I'm sitting against the wall. The door opens and my father walks out. He looks down and catches my gaze.

"You heard everything," he guesses. I nod. Mike walks out and stands next to him.

"I'm gonna call Susan," Mike says as he walks down the stairs. My father waits until he's out of sight and kneels down right in front of me.

"I'm sorry you had to hear that, hun," he murmurs, staring into my blue-green eyes.

"Too late for that," I whisper almost inaudibly as I stare back.

"You're never gonna forgive me, are you?" I think about it for a few seconds.

"Eventually, I will."