What It Took

Month - December.

Isolation:
Days of isolation had now turned into months and I was alone. I had created a new life, a much happier one that didn't include the people from my old one. My new life didn't include one person: “Him.”

Sobriety:
After that long night, where I drank and drove until passing out in a hotel parking lot, I developed a problem. I soon became a heavy alcoholic but I never ended up like “He” did. See I began to understand why “He” turned to alcohol, it's just so friendly and it's there to drown you out from the world that you fear. I battled with alcohol for three months and then became sober. I became sober from everything and I became sober from love. I had never went back to get my belongings from “His” house, in order to avoid "Him". I re - bought everything and even bought an apartment.

Abandoned:
I haven't talked to any of them since that night, not even Val or Lola. I couldn't bare to even think about talking to my brother. I think they knew that I needed to be with myself in order to figure out my life. See, “He” drained me. I had never ever been so emotionally and mentally connected with someone like I had with “Him.” I've been so disconnected from those feelings, that I will not even allow myself to say “His” name. I know I'll break down if I do. I don't love “Him,” and I don't care to anymore.

Life:

I was sitting in my apartment that I had made mine but it still always felt empty. All my friends and family weren't part of it and it slightly bothered me. I had gotten a new phone and I sent my new number to Matt but told him to call me only if it was an emergency. I knew he was worried about me but it's been 5 months since I've seen or talked to him. Growing up being the youngest, I was always dependent on Matt and he was not just a brother but a friend. I now missed my old friend.

As I began to close my eyes to block the thoughts that would come up about “Him” every once in awhile, my phone rang. Jumping up shocked that I was being called, and fearing that something bad had happened, I answered it with out checking the I.D.

"Hello? Is this Mel?" A familiar deep voice asked from the other line.

"Matt! Yes, It's me...It's Mel." I said so excitingly to hear my brothers voice.

"Oh sweetie! We've all been worried sick about you! How are you? Better question: Where the fuck are you?" He said in that fatherly tone that I missed.

"I'm fine!"

"Fuck, Mel! You still think I don't know you? You aren’t fine, you’re depressed.” He said.

I ignored the depressed part because I was in some serious denial.

“Please tell me where you are! We all miss you so much Mel!” He continued.

When he said ‘We all miss you so much’ part of me wonder if ‘We all…’ Even included “Him.”

“Matt, you know I can’t tell you that…:” I said.

But after over an hour of him pushing, I finally gave in and told him my new address and also told him to come alone. Within an hour and a half, there was a strong knock on my door. I jolted up to answer it and as soon as the door flung open, I was engulfed in an enormous hug.

“God! I miss you so much! You look surprisingly amazing!” Matt yelled with joy as he spun me around and gave my forehead a quick kiss.

“Surprisingly?” I said with a lifted eyebrow.

“Well, usually when people are depressed they let themselves go because they stop caring about there physical appearance. But as egotistical as you are my dear sister, I should’ve known you would never let your appearance slip.” He said with a crocked smirk, causing me to laugh and hug him.

“I missed you so much Matty Fuck - face!” I chanted as I motioned for him to have a seat on my couch. “How’s everyone at home?”

“Everyone’s okay but then again everyone has been worried sick about you!”

I looked down wondering, yet again, if ‘Everyone’ meant “Him.” Matt noticed that I was thinking that to.

“You realize that Christmas is this week, right?” He asked me.

“Sure, but Matt I’m not leaving. There’s no fucking way in hell!”

“Mel it will mean so much to everyone if you come over for Christmas. They’re your family. I’m your family.” He included.

Minutes went by and he persuaded me again.

“You can stay over tonight. Lola and I own our own house now and we have tons of guest rooms.” He said with a smile as he marched into my room to pack my stuff.

“Matt, I can pack my own stuff.”

“Bring cool stuff because I’m having a party in your honor tonight! There will be tons of drinks for you to!”

When he mentioned alcohol I freaked.

“I’m not going! NO! NO! NO! I’m sorry.”

“Whoa, wait! Why? Is there something you aren’t telling me?” He said, completely stopping packing my clothes. “Listen, if you’re still caught up on that whole Zack and drinkin----” I cut him off as soon as I heard the name.

“Don’t say that!”

“Say what? Mel, say what?”

“I don’t ever want to fucking hear that god damn name ever again, do you hear me, Matt?” I said as I gridded my teeth.

Matt looked at me, and realized his mistake and apologized.

“Well, what if you see Za… I mean “Him” He said correcting himself. “What are you going to do?”

I looked at him helpless and he knew to stop talking about “Him.” And I’m glad he took the hint.

He eventually got me into his car and I was leaving my safe haven and falling back into the real world.

What would I do If "He" showed up?