How to Make a Human

"What just happened?" I asked dumbly as Shane pulled me through the hallway to our first period class.

"Nothing. Nothing at all," Shane responded, tightening his grip on my wrist and pulling me faster.

"Okay, stop," I demanded firmly, pulling my wrist out of his grip. "You'll break my delicate lady-wrists with your brute strength."

"Sorry," Shane sighed sheepishly, readjusting his furry hat and crossing his arms.

"Why are you mad at Bear?"

"I'm not!" Shane immediately defended.

"No?" I asked, "So you were just fighting with her for fun?"

"We're siblings. It's what we do."

I raised an eyebrow.

"Come on, we'll be late for class," he told me, shoving his hands in his pockets and shuffling his feet lazily.

"Who's Luke?" I asked bluntly, walking behind him and swinging my arms at my sides innocently.

"Bear's loser ex-boyfriend," Shane responded moodily before he could stop himself. He stopped in his tracks, ignoring the hallway traffic around us.

"How do you know about Luke?" he asked accusingly.

"Uh… I listened to your whole conversation like… three minutes ago."

"Oh… right."

"So… why is he a loser?" I asked, pushing him forward as we continued our way to class.

Shane huffed and crossed his arms again, "No reason."

"Well," I paused and smirked to myself, "He sounds pretty cool to me."

"Are you kidding me?" Shane snapped angrily. "He's cheated on Bear! Three times!"

"Shit, that sucks," I mumbled for lack of something better to say. I truly am an excellent people person.

"Hell yeah it sucks!" Shane grunted, "And she's so stupid about it! She's just all, 'I'm Bear! And even though I've been cheated on twice I think I'm gonna give him another chance!' You know the only reason she actually broke up with him is because I literally forced her to! It's stupid! He's stupid! Bear's stupid!"

"You made her break-up with him? Isn't that her personal choice or something?" It wasn't that I agreed with Bear, being cheated on once was enough, let alone three times, but I couldn't help but understand Bear's irritation. We stopped out front of Mrs. Goilleur's room and Shane pulled his hat off and stuffed it into his messenger bag.

"I wouldn't expect you to understand," he grunted angrily, pushing the door open and storming to his seat. I wouldn't expect me to understand either.

His irritation at me for not 100% agreeing with him was obvious, but I couldn't help it. It's stupid of Bear to keep dating an asshole, I should know, I watch Oprah, but it's also not Shane's job to monitor Bear's love life. It's probably irritating as all holy hell.

I took my seat across the table from Shane and heaved a great sigh. Mrs. Goilleur entered the room shortly after and began to explain the new assignment. Well, that was what she was doing before she got distracted and started talking about why foldable chairs shouldn't be used in schools.

"They pinch people! Those chairs are unsafe!" she complained silkily, fixing the glittery, purple dragonfly pin on her chest. The door opened and Demetri casually strolled in.

"Mr. Bodello," Mrs. Goilleur tittered lightly, "Is there any reason why you are late?"

"Uh, I'm not. Class hasn't started yet," he answered, gesturing to the clock on the wall.

"Ah, it would appear I am incorrect," she stated more to herself than to the class. "Well, I've been wrong before. I am only human, and to error is human."

Demetri rolled his eyes and made his way to his seat next to me. He kicked his bag under the desk and slouched into his chair right as the bell rang. Glancing from Shane to me, he raised an accusing eyebrow.

"Shane? You alright?"

"What? Yeah! Super! I'm awesome!" he responded excitedly. "Have you met Olive's cousin? He's a great guy."

"Yeah, we've met," Demetri answered, glancing at me. "Why?"

"No reason. Oh, wait, except for he's a super hunk and Bear and him are flirting like mad!"

"And you're surprised by this why?"

"What do you mean?" Shane asked, blowing his untamed, red hair out of his eyes.

"Bear's a flirt, Ben's probably a flirt. It makes sense. They're both jocky," Demetri turned to me, "I'm right, aren't I? Ben is probably in some sports."

"Yeah. Soccer, track, tennis, and I think he quit basketball this year."

"Look, from what I've gathered, Ben is like the male version of Bear. It's only natural that they'll flirt. Just deal with it."

"But she only broke up with Luke yesterday!" Shane whined like the overprotective brother he likes to pretend he's not.

"Yeah, and now she's trying to move on. I suggest you let her," Demetri said bluntly, pulling papers out of his bag.

"Fine," Shane huffed after a minute or two. "Olive?"

"Yeah?"

"Is your cousin a douche or anything like that?"

"No, he's actually really rad," I confirmed. Shane still looked unconvinced, so I wiped away his worries with, "The shortest relationship he's ever had was like eight months, so it's not like he's a man-whore or anything."

Shane nodded his head, "I can deal with that."

"Bobbie, Demetri, Shane, you're not talking are you? In my class? While I'm talking? Oh, what am I thinking? Of course not! You young adults are perfectly polite and would never interrupt me."

"Sorry, Mrs. Goilleur," we all simultaneously apologized. Even after just a week, Mrs. Goilleur's lectures were becoming a regular occurrence. We bowed our heads and worked on the assigned reading until class was over. When the bell finally rang students shoved their books into their bags and rushed out of the room, including Shane who muttered something like, "I have crap to take care of, see you later."

I swung my bag over my shoulder and pushed the chair under the table a bit harder then necessary in my haste to not be the last person left in class. Demetri followed in suit and walked out the door with me.

"Listen, Bobbie, I need a favor," Demetri asked, walking in step with me and placing his hands in his pockets, as per usual.

"Why would I do you a favor?" I asked before I could even think about how rude it sounded. I tried to play it off like I didn't care how bitchy I was by looking at my nails absentmindedly. The only flaw in that plan is that school hallways are usually quite busy during passing periods and if you don't look where you're going, you might just run into a scrawny freshman, back up onto someone leaning against a locker, turn around to apologize, trip on someone's backpack and land on your butt.

And of course I'm just cool enough to do that.

Demetri laughed and held out his hand which I promptly ignored. If he thinks that now we can be friends because he needs a favor, he's wrong. Completely wrong.

… Unless said favor strengthens our relationship and makes us great friends.

I pushed myself off the ground and clambered ungracefully through the sea of blue uniforms, Demetri following closely behind.

"So… about my favor?"

"Hell no," I retorted.

"Please!"

Don't break, Bobbie, don't break! Manners do not make him your friend.

"What's the favor?" I huffed, stopping outside my second period class. Damn it, I am weak!

Demetri smiled and patted my back, "That's my girl! Anyway, this favor should help you out too."

"Just tell me the damn favor," I snapped, more angry at my willpower then Demetri.

"We have fourth period science together, right?"

"Yeah, and…?"

"You sit next to Ron, right?"

"Yes?"

"Would you switch me seats?"

"Is that it?" I deadpanned.

"Yeah. You see, I sit next to that Monica girl--"

"Oh, right. She's in my third period class too. She's pretty nice."

"Yeah, she's a real gem," Demetri replied with an eye roll.

"Then why switch places? Have you not met Ron? He's bat-shit crazy."

"Then all the better for you! Now you don't have to sit next to him! Monica likes me and it's weird, so I need to switch seats."

"What's so bad about her liking you?"

"She's just too… uhg, I don't know, open. She tells me everything and expects me to welcome her with open arms because she tells me her life story. Plus she flirts like she hasn't seen a friggin' guy for years, and--"

"Okay. Enough. I don't want to hear you be a jerk just because the poor girl likes you," I interrupted, feeling bad for Monica. Oh, woe is the high school romance of females.

"… So… will you do it?"

I tried to make it look like it was a hassle, even though I was ecstatic at the prospect of not having to sit next to creepy Ron anymore. "Fine."

"Oh thank god!" Demetri cried in a very unDemetri-like way, throwing his arms around me and hugging me.

"Just go to Mr. Gert's class a couple of minutes early and tell him you want to switch seats. I already told him I didn't want to sit next to Monica anymore and so he'll probably just switch us."

"Fine," I sighed dramatically.

"Oh, and Bobbie?"

"What?"

"Thanks."

I rolled my eyes, smiling despite myself and pushed the door open to my next class, leaving Demetri by himself.