Love Bites

I never realized how quiet the apartment was. Laying in the dark, I listen to the faded noises of driving cars, begging for sleep. I can still smell Aiji’s sweet, musky scent in the pillows and sheets. I miss him more than I even thought possible. They’ve been gone for 3 days now, and we’ve hardly talked. The time difference is too much. I find myself preoccupied with thoughts of him and my family; those loved ones I’m forbidden to see. Why is this all so difficult? Rolling over in bed I catch a glimpse of the clock. 1:00 am. Sigh. I wonder if Toshi’s up? Knowing him he probably is. We’ve hung out a few times at least…Reaching for my phone, I quickly find his number.
Hey T-Man. U up? ~Missing you~
I wait for what only seems like seconds.
Am I ever not up? ^Kaoru has a purple dick^
I can’t help but giggle. It’s true. If I hadn’t known better, I’d say he was a vampire. And what’s this about Kaoru? The poor guy. I don’t see how he manages to put up with Toshi, let alone their entire band. By now I’ve become close friends with him and Shinya. I really haven’t met Die and Kyo, but I’ve heard enough about them.
How silly of me. Teehee. Whacha up to? I can’t sleep. And stop picking on Kaoru! ~Missing You~
I’m out clubbin. Care to join me? I can swing by and pick you up. I’m still not wasted. But it’s true!!!! It is purple!!!! ^Kaoru has a purple dick^
You swear you haven’t had anything to drink? How would you know? ~Missing You~
Swear on my sex life!!! That information is confidential T_T ~Kaoru has a purple dick~
Okay, gimme about 20 mins to get ready. Just change it! Poor Kaoru has to deal with enough! ~Missing you~
On my way now. Don’t be alarmed if I bust in through a window. Fine. ^Die=Fire Crotch^
I’ll leave the door open for you!!! Don’t break a window!!! Sigh, you’re impossible. ~Missing you~
You get what you get!!! You love me!! :D ^Die=Fire Crotch^
You keep telling yourself that. C ya soon T >:D ~Missing You~
Already, I feel better. More like my old self. Toshiya has a way of cheering me up. I can’t help but love him for that. As a friend of course. As long as I have someone to keep me company, I should be okay. And who knows, maybe I’ll meet some new people tonight. I can only hope. With Toshi gone next month, I’ll definitely need someone’s company. Dragging my lazy ass out of bed and to the bathroom, I quickly discover I’m in dire need of a shower. Ugh, I don’t even remember when the last time was. Soooo gross. Sure I skip them occasionally, who doesn’t? But checking out my reflection I thought I was looking at a picture of Oscar the Grouch.Sick. Stripping down and hopping into the running tub, the warm water instantly sends shivers of delight throughout my body. I love showers. They’re so relaxing. Unfortunately, they can never last long enough. I hear the doorbell ring and quickly wrap my still dripping body in an oversized towel rushing to the door, flinging it open.
“I told you I left the door open!” I scold expecting to see Toshi. Instead, I find Aiji standing there, bouquet of flowers in hand.“…Aiji?” I whimper, my eyes tearing over.
“Happy Birthday.” He smiles tenderly, extending the flowers to me. That’s right, I totally forgot it was my birthday. Time seemed to completely slip by me. It didn’t even phase me that today was the day mother brought me into this world.
“Oh Aiji!!!” I cry springing into his arms, his instantaneously wrapping around my own body, ushering me into the tiny apartment. I look over his shoulder to discover that my towel slipped off…oh my. Even if I can’t see it myself, I know my face is redder than a tomato.
“Well this is awkward.” He laughs kicking the door closed with his foot.
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“So why are you home? I thought you were in America.” I ask snuggling close to him in bed.
“We have a few gigs here, then we’re headed to Europe.” He informs me, lips pressed to my head as he inhales my newly shampooed head. Thank god I showered. “But your brother and his new girlfriend helped me plot this. Toshiya too.” He grins.
“Oh shit!!! Toshi!!! I totally forgot about him!!!!” I exclaim scrambling to find my phone.
“It’s cool! It’s cool!!! That was part of the plan too!!!!” He informs, shoving me back into bed and into his grasp. “Although I don’t see what purpose it really served…I think he just wanted to show off his signature.” Aiji chuckles. He’s so cuddly today. He hasn’t stopped kissing me, let alone let go of me. I’m willing to bet if I went to the bathroom he’d follow…
“Maya has a girlfriend?” I smile, changing the topic.
“Yeah. How she can put up with him is beyond me.” He mutters, fingers fiddling with my ear. “Her name’s Elizabeth. She’s pretty nice. I’m sure you’ll like her. By the way, they’re all at Toshiya’s.”
“I’m amazed how close you all are.” I smile. “I was sure you’d hated one Maya enough…now you’ve got two!!!!” I laugh kissing his nose, scooching closer to him. His body is so warm. I’ve missed that extra warmth.
“If I could only find the gun…” He grumbles, laughter in his delicate eyes.
“Awe, you can’t do that. Who will cuddle me at night?”
“My ghost.” He grins running a finger over my eyebrow and down the bridge of my nose, momentarily pinching it, making me giggle.
“Ghosts are cold though!”
“Not mine. Since I’m hot my ghost will be hot.” He chuckles pressing his lips to mine lovingly, his tongue tracing patterns on my lower lip. Hesitantly, I open my mouth allowing him entrance. I quickly find our tongues entwined in a dance of their own as his arms snake around my neck, tugging gently at the hair at the nape of my neck. His fingers weave their way to my ears, massaging them gently until I can no longer imprison the moan in my throat. He cranes my face closer to his gently as he rolls to sit over top of me. That’s when I feel it and know I have to stop him before we get carried away. Shoving him off me, I sit up breathing rapidly, my heart beating crazily. He looks rather hurt, and slightly agitated. “Did I do something wrong?” He asks crawling close to me again, the lust broiling in his eyes.
“No, I’m sorry. It’s just me. I can’t do this.” I mumble looking away, evading his eye line and attempts to turn me on even more.
“We don’t have to go all the way. We can just mess around.” He pleads, his hand resting possessively on my upper thigh. I want more than anything to tell him yes, to let him make love to me. I’ve denied him how many times now? I can’t continue lying to him.
“No Aiji. I can’t. I can’t even do that and I’m sorry.” I whisper bringing my knees to my chest so that his hand falls from me.
“Remi, I promise I would never hurt you. And you know I love you. More than anything. Every night I fall asleep wishing you were by my side and dreaming of you. I just want to show you that.” He moves closer, the pain in his eyes breaking down my barriers one by one. It gets more and more difficult with each passing second to deny him.
“I love you two Aiji!! And I know you love me, but I can’t! And I’m sorry! I want to, but can’t. I don’t want to hurt you.” I whisper the last part, tears falling from my eyes.
“Remi you could never hurt me.”
“Aiji I could kill you.” I whisper meeting his eyes, his confused expression. “And I would.”
“Rem…what are you talking about?”
“…I have AIDs.” I mutter, the tears streaming down my face, and his grow wide in shock and betrayal.