Don't Try To Fix Me I'm Not Broken

I bit down on my bottom lip.

Today was rather… well, to put it lightly, it wasn’t a good day for me.

The guys just got back from touring. I wished I had gone with them. Maybe I could’ve changed the things that happened, while I was away.

I glared down at my hands.

Everything was shit right now.

I should’ve gone, but I had something important to do. I did it for me. No, I did it for him. He didn’t need me there, dragging him behind.

"Don’t get angry over the dumb ass, Rylee." someone said.

I recognized the voice as Zacky’s. I smiled up at him.

"I’m not angry," I said. "Bullshit, I’m scared right now. You’re making the air tense," he said laughing.

I shrugged. I guess I wasn’t a very good actress.

I brought my hand to my lips, and I began chewing at my nails.

I knew it was a bad habit, but it helped me calm down. Especially for times like this, it really helped.

I was so damn stupid.

"You should really stop biting those damn nails, Rylee." Zacky said. I shrugged.

"I just need to calm down, Zacky-kins." I said. Zacky glared at me. "I don’t like that name," he muttered. I smirked.

I knew that would get him to pout. He was like a puppy.

"Oh, you’re so funny!"

I gritted my teeth together.

Must that woman be so damn loud? It was annoying enough just to know that she was in the same building as me! I didn’t need to hear her shrill voice.

"You know, he’s an ass for bringing her here. I didn’t want to bring her along with us," Zacky said. I shrugged.

"It doesn’t bother me," I said quickly. Zacky scoffed loudly.

"You may say that, but we all know that it bothers you, Rylee. We all see how you feel about him," Zacky said.

I rolled my eyes.

I hated it, when this man was always right. It bugged me.

"Oh, you’re the best ever," the voice yelled.

This bitch was just trying to get on my nerves, wasn’t she? If she said something like that one more time, so help me God.

"Umm… yeah, Zacky how was today for you?" I asked. He rolled his eyes.

"Avoiding the issue here?" he asked.

I shook my head.

I knew what the issue was, but I didn’t see the point in doing anything. I’ve already tried multiple times, and each time I did, I got hurt. I wasn’t about to do it again.

Besides, he made it very clear on who he wanted to be with. He didn’t want me. I was used. I was soiled. I wasn’t any good to him anymore.

"No, I’m not. Well, I am, but there’s no need in talking about it anymore. What’s done is done, even though it was pretty crazy." I said. I attempted to do a fake laugh, but it felt dry in my throat and it came out badly.

Zacky scoffed, and he stood up.

He stretched out his arms.

Okay, fine. I’ll make a deal with myself. If I hear her one more time, then I’ll just go tell her to please shut the fuck up because I’m trying to forget that you’re even here.

Yes, that’s a good idea.

"Oh, God, Jimmy."

Fuck yes that was my limit.

I quickly stood up, and I walked passed Zacky. I could practically picture the smirk on his face.

He knew exactly what I was going to do now. Hell, he was the one who was trying to get me to do it.

I walked outside of the living room, and I bee lined it to the gaming room. I knew they were in there.

I felt someone grab me by the arm, and I turned around angrily. It was Matt.

He was staring at me so oddly.

"Rylee, don’t do it," he said. I shook my head.

"Damn it, Matt! Let me go. I’m gonna fucking rip her dumb ass head off!" I screamed.

I wondered how telling her to shut up went to ripping her head off. I honestly didn’t know.

I continued to try to pry Matt’s hand off of me, but this fucker was strong. I guess his muscles weren’t just for show then.

"Rylee, you had your chance. He didn’t want you, so he went and got himself Jenna. You should move on," Matt said.

"Fuck the damn bitch. She’s a fucking whore that’ll just use him for his damn money and fame!" I yelled.

Matt held onto me. He even positioned both of his arms on my shoulders.

He wasn’t gonna let me go in there, was he?

"Look, Rylee, he’s done, finished with you. I don’t want you going in there and ruin what they have because you couldn’t get over a one night stand," Matt said.

I was glaring at Matt so hard by now.

I flung my arm out of his grip, and I slapped him hard. But once I had done it, I regretted it.

But that wasn’t going to stop me from yelling back at him.

"Matt that was never a one night stand for me! I thought that was going to fucking give me the relationship I wanted with him! We didn’t sleep with each other just once, Matt! We slept together each night he was here in May!"

"How was I suppose to know that he was dating her? You guys just got back from touring. How was I suppose to know that he decided to pick up some fucking fan girl, while I was gone?"

"How was I suppose to know that he would throw me away like I was garbage? I thought he loved me, Matt. I fucking love him, Matt. I love that damned man. I love the idiot that doesn’t give me a second look!" I yelled out.

I could feel all the air leaving my lungs. I dropped to the ground. It was then that I realized I had tears in my eyes.

"Is that so wrong that I love him, Matt?" I asked softly.

I felt a pair of hands on my shoulders.

"Is it, Matt?" I asked. "No, of course not, honey." Matt said.

"What’s wrong with me?" I asked. "Nothing, he just wasn’t thinking about what he was doing," Matt said.

I felt myself laughing. Why was I laughing?

"Matt, we both know that he knew exactly what he was doing." I said.

Did that come from me? Why would I say that? I was suppose to believe in Matt’s words. I was suppose to believe that he wouldn’t do that to me.

"What the fuck is this?"

I looked up, and I clenched my fists up. I wanted to punch her stupid face in.

"What the fuck does it look like, you dumb ass stupid fucking crack whore!" I screamed.

"Honey, she’s scary!" she yelled.

She grabbed onto him, holding onto his arm.

I gritted my teeth together.

"Rylee, you okay?" he asked. I felt myself giggle a bit. Okay, that even scared me.

"Don’t act like you care," I spat out. He looked at me oddly.

He unraveled her arms from his arm, and he bent down next to me. He was squatting down, but he still looked like a tower to me.

I felt his hand run through my jet black hair. His touch was soft, and I could feel my anger disappearing. He knew exactly what to do, when I needed to be calmed down.

No! That wasn’t suppose to be happening right now!

"Don’t fucking touch me!" I screamed. I slapped his hand away from me. I was glaring hard at him.

"Tell me," I said. "What do you want to know?" he asked.

"You fucking know! Why did you bring this tacky ass whore along with you?" I yelled. He looked a little nervous.

"That’s a little hard to explain right now," he said.

"What the fuck?"

She honestly didn’t need to be speaking right now. I just wanted to go to fuck a dog or something right now!

"Bitch, back off; I’m talking to him!" I yelled. She grabbed onto his arm again.

"Let’s go, babe. She’s fucking pathetic," she said. Jimmy was still squatting down, so it was easily for her to lick inside his ear.

The little slut bag….

I stood up quickly, and I grabbed her by her throat. In other words, I was choking the hell out of her.

I felt her kicking me, and she eventually hit me in the shins. I let go of her neck to hold my shin.

She tackled me to the ground, and she started to pull at my hair.

I grabbed her arms, and I twisted my body, so I was on top of her. I brought my fists down on her, but I couldn’t punch her more than twice.

Someone pulled me off of her. I recognized the big arms as Matt’s.

I gave up fighting back, and Matt let go of me.

I watched as he looked over her body, looking for any bad injuries.

"Damn it, Rylee!" He yelled. I glared at him. "What the fuck; it wasn’t even my fault!" I screamed.

"I don’t even understand why you’re doing this. You have another man. You don’t need me!" he yelled.

I stared at him oddly. What the fuck was this man talking about? I had another man? Hell no, I didn’t. He was the one who had this bitch all over him!

"What the fuck are you talking about? I don’t have any guy. You fucking left me! I don’t have anyone here except for the guys to fucking comfort me, you asshole!" I yelled.

"I heard about that guy that you were with at the diner, the restaurant, and at the mall with!" he yelled.

I stopped to think. You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me, right?

"You fucking dumb ass! That was my freaking cousin from Sacramento!" I yelled.

"Holy shit," he mumbled.

"Baby, she’s lying to you. Don’t listen to her. She’ll say anything to break us up," she whispered.

"Shut the fuck up, Victoria! I’m talking to someone!" He yelled.

"Fuck you, asshole." She said.

And with that, she walked off. I guess she realized that he wasn’t exactly going to let her wrap him around her finger anymore.

"What do you mean, Rylee?" he asked.

"Well, after you left, I found out that I was pregnant," I said.

I didn’t need to say anymore. I felt arms wrapped tightly around my body.

I smelt the familiar smell of JD and cologne.

"What happened to it?" he asked. "Aborted," I whispered.

His arms got even tighter around my body. I could feel his breath in my hair.

"I don’t want you ever doing that ever again," he said. "Again?" I asked.

I felt a cold hand lifting my chin up. I was looking up at his face.

He was looking at me intently, and it felt so very nice.

He bent down, and he kissed me softly. He slowly broke the kiss.

"Rylee, I want a boy," he said.

"Then let’s starting working on that," I said, smirking. He nodded happily.

And with that, he picked me up bridal style.

"To the bedroom!" he yelled.

Jimmy was such a tall weirdo in the greatest way.