Sacrifices
Chapter One.
Its been 3 years since that day when my world was turned.
She had always just been a sister. Just been a friend. Just been a girl.
Now... Now she was so much more.
By those few words... she had changed my point of view --and my world-- completely.
Let me explain.
---
Fourth Grade.
"Bye, Nina. See you next year," I promised as I hugged one of my more casual friends, Nina. We had all come to get our report cards at 10 am and say goodbye to our friends. I was glad I had passed this year, I'd spent so much time doing... well, nothing. Which was why the B's on my report card had pleasantly surprised me.
"I'll see you in a couple weeks, Gee. 'Member, my family has that barbecue on the fourth of July. You better be there!" said Matt, one of my closer friends. I told him I would be there, and went to say goodbye to everyone else.
After Nina, Matt, Mike, Sarah, Jocelyn, Shawn, Katie, Logan, and all my other friends and acquaintances were out of the way, I made my way to Bonnie's locker. We'd been best friends since Kindergarten, and we were closer than brother and sister. Since Mikey was only 5, I felt like I knew her better than I knew him.
Suddenly I felt a pair of hands cover my eyes.
I shrieked involuntarily. Of course, I knew it was her, but I was always tightly wound, and would jump at the drop of a pin.
I tried to get away, and I felt about 70 pounds, give or take, jump onto my back.
"Hey, Gee! Guess who!" she giggled.
"Liza?" I joked.
She laughed her cute little laugh again and hopped down.
"Its 10:30. I been here for an hour. Where ya been!" she demanded, pretending to be indignant.
"Bonnie, bella! Where have I been? Why, you of all people should know that I've been hunting for a rabbit skin to wrap my little Bonnie in!" I joked again. It was an old joke of ours. Since a young age we both had an odd obsession with Gone With The Wind and Clark Gable. Don't ask.
"Hah! Any plans for the summer?"
"Not really. I'll be taking care of Mikey a lot; my parents are going to Hawaii for a week, and we'll have an on-and-off babysitter. How about you?"
She shrugged, "Nothing but a week of camp in August," she made a face. She hated her camp and the baton that came with it; but her parents insisted. I had no idea why; she was good at so many other things, why baton? Where would it get her? It was a question we'd been asking her parents since second grade when they'd bought her a silver baton. She'd nearly set fire to it.
"Fun. When you get back, I want to see lots of pictures!" I teased. She hated her counselors and her campmates--and they hated her. I wished I could go with her to make it a little better, or a little more fun.
While this was all going on, we were slowly walking towards the front doors where her parents would pick her up, and I would begin my short walk home.
"How did your report card go?" she asked.
"Surprisingly well. Mostly all B's, except for a B minus. Not too bad, how about you?"
"In order, Choir, Art, Math, Language Arts, Gym, Science, and American History, A,A,B,A,D,D,C. It evens out," she shrugged. She never put much of a store by grades. She didn't want a real job; she wanted to be a singer, a dancer, an actress, a band mate, an artist, any kind of musician. All at once. Her body couldn't be everywhere, so her mind wanted to be; which made it so exciting to be her best friend. It was never a dull moment with my bella, Bonnie Marena Lombardi.
At this point, we heard a honk. A black SUV had pulled up, signaling that Bonnie had to go.
"I'll see you next year, Gerard. I'll miss you!" she said, hugging me tightly, "Promise you'll stay at this school, with me!"
"I promise, bella. See you next year," I said, hugging her back. She skipped off towards her parents' car, her wild black curls flying in the wind. I'd really miss her.
----
Back in the world of ninth grade, I'll bet you're thinking, "Yeah, so what? Get on with the damn story Gerard. What's so great about this girl?" And I shall tell you.
Over the years, fifth, sixth, seventh grade, my friends had started to sort of drift. Most of them. I was only invited to one birthday party a year--Bonnie's. And I was the only one she'd ever invite. Said nobody else would care enough if she did invite them, so she didn't bother. Anyways, my friends would start hanging out with older people, because they thought it made them look cool. The older kids would get them to do things they otherwise would never even dream of--bad things. I wasn't into that, so I shied away from it. People said I was uncool, that I was a pansy, so after a while, we all just stopped talking. I had no interest in hanging out with these people any longer, and as a result, I stuck to my own secluded corner at lunch and recess.
Again, you're thinking, "Gerard, yeah, I know that sucks, but SERIOUSLY. Get ON with it! HOW does she tie into all of this?" And once again, I shall explain.
---
Beginning of sixth grade
I walked down the hallways towards the auditorium, where we would be getting our pep talk for the year. I could see it was already half full, and almost all of the faces were familiar to me. I walked down the aisles, unnoticed by everyone, and tried to find a place to sit. Every time I saw an empty seat, the people sitting around it would look at me, look at each other, and place a bag or some other object onto the seat. It confused the shit out of me.
"Gerard!" I heard a high pitched, all too familiar voice call from the back.
Bonnie! I was so panicked when I couldn't find her at all at the front doors this morning. She was sitting in the middle of the row, an empty seat to her left. Her friends all stopped talking and looked at me, then looked at Bonnie like she was retarded. She waved me over, ignoring them.
"Hey, Bonnie! How was your summer?" I asked. I felt very uncomfortable with all her friends, dead silent, listening to our conversation. I could almost feel their contempt.
"Same old, same old. Sorry I wasn't at the front this morning, but I woke up way too late! I hope you didn't stick around for long?" she said, concerned.
"Nah," I lied, "I got here pretty late, too..."
We were shushed as the presentation began.
One boring hour later, we were ushered to our classrooms. I still had the same class with Bonnie, thank God. Everyone else hated me with a passion, and if I wasn't able to spend every in school moment with her.... well, let's just be glad I could.
The morning passed slowly, and when the bell rang for recess, everyone ran outside into the bright sunshine. Bonnie and I went to play tether ball, and everyone mostly avoided us.
In the middle of our game, we stopped as we heard a voice. A few voices, actually. Female voices.
"Bonnie, what are you doing?" Her friend Megan asked, with scorn in her voice.
"Playing tether ball," Bonnie replied icily without looking at them. She sent the ball towards me again.
"Why are you even talking to this loser?" the girl beside Megan asked.
"Because he's not a loser, and he's my friend," she said, beginning to get a little miffed.
There was silence for a moment, and all three girls, Megan and the two girls I didn't recognize, burst out laughing.
"Ah, Bonnie, we thought you were serious for a second... Now come on, let's go to the jungle gym," said Megan.
Instead of hitting the ball back to me, Bonnie caught it, and turned around.
"No, Megan, I don't want to go with you. I'm happy playing tether ball with my best friend here, and if you'd like to join us, feel free. If not, get lost," she said, her voice rising.
"You're making a big mistake, Bonnie. Nobody will want to talk to someone who hangs out with a loser. Especially a loser as big as him," one of the other girls said with a sneer.
"He's not a loser!" Bonnie suddenly shrieked. I jumped a little. Bonnie, no matter how bouncy and hyper she was, never, ever raised her voice.
"I don't know what your problem is, but leave us alone! You don't know Gerard like I do, and you're lucky I don't walk over there and knock you on your ass!" This also shocked me. Bonnie had never sworn in her whole life. Hell, I had never sworn, at that age. I just stood there stupidly, staring at fiery little Bonnie, with a tether ball clenched in her small hands.
Her old friends gasped. They were as shocked as I was to see Bonnie like this, and they weren't sure how to react. Finally, one of the girls I didn't know started walking closer to my little friend.
"I don't think a little person like you should be able to get away with saying stuff like that, Bonnie. Especially not to her friends," her voice had a sinister tone to it. I started to get worried.
"What are you going to do, Sarah? Tell on me?" Bonnie retorted, standing at her full four foot ten inches. She wasn't afraid of this girl, who stood about two and a half heads taller than her.
Sarah pushed Bonnie backwards, and she lost her balance. When I saw her hit the ground, I got angry. There wasn't much I could do to a girl, but I would do what I could.
"Leave her alone!" I screamed at Sarah, moving towards her.
"Hey look, the loser's talking to me! I didn't know they could talk!" Sarah taunted.
"I'm serious Sarah, get away from us," I said, trying to keep calm. It wasn't really working.
"What are you going to do? Hit a girl?"
No. Of course I wouldn't. You weren't supposed to do that. Even a 12 year old boy like me knows that. Even if they asked for it. Right?
I stood beside the sitting Bonnie, about a foot in front of Sarah. Standing straight, Bonnie barely reached my shoulder, whereas Sarah came up about even with me. Just as I was telling myself I couldn't hit a girl, I looked down. Bonnie was focusing on the tether ball, but I could see the small tear drops on her sleeves.
Not hit a girl? I would hit whoever the hell I felt like!
I picked up the tether ball, and with a little yell I chucked it at Sarah. It knocked her glasses clean off her face. She stumbled back and looked stunned. She wasn't expecting me to actually do something. The other two girls ran away, and Sarah picked up her glasses as she turned to do the same. But before she turned, I was satisfied to see tears streaming down her face. I should have felt ashamed, but I didn't. All I could feel was pain wrenching my heart for the pitiful Bonnie, crying, on the ground beside me. I turned and picked small Bonnie up.
"Are you okay?" I asked, cradling her to me.
She sniffled and nodded, then she looked at me with a small smile, and adoration shining in her big green eyes.
"You really nailed her, didn't ya, Gee?" she said, almost giggling.
"I sure did. Just for you, bella. Are you real hurt?" I asked softly.
"No... Not anymore," she added, smiling brightly.
"Let's go sit on the bench and watch the kickball game," I suggested. I put her down and as she turned to walk towards the kickball field, I saw her little elbow, scraped and smeared with blood.
"Bonnie, you're bleeding!" I said suddenly.
"I am? Where?" she asked, alarmed.
"Your elbow. Come on, let's go clean it up! Does it hurt?"
"Well, no. I didn't even notice it. But now that you mention it... Eew."
I laughed. She was so damn cute sometimes.
We went into our classroom, where at the back corner there was a sink and paper towels for after art class. I cleaned her elbow off, and she shrieked as the warm water hit the tender scrape. She didn't feel it before, but she certainly could now. It also appeared to be pretty deep. I almost couldn't do it.
After it was clean, I got a band-aid out of the First Aid Kit hanging on the wall. I stuck it on and gave my little 'sister's' elbow a kiss.
"Better?" I asked.
"Better," she agreed, smiling and hugging me.
"And don't worry, Gerard, I'd rather have you as a friend and a big brother than the whole school. The whole entire world, even!" she said earnestly.
And I believed her.
---
And maybe now, friends, you can understand just why I love this girl so much. She sacrificed her many friends just for me, just so she could continue being around me. And I know that if the situation had been reversed, I would have done the exact same for her.
Because--I'll say it one more time-- I love her, just that much.
She had always just been a sister. Just been a friend. Just been a girl.
Now... Now she was so much more.
By those few words... she had changed my point of view --and my world-- completely.
Let me explain.
---
Fourth Grade.
"Bye, Nina. See you next year," I promised as I hugged one of my more casual friends, Nina. We had all come to get our report cards at 10 am and say goodbye to our friends. I was glad I had passed this year, I'd spent so much time doing... well, nothing. Which was why the B's on my report card had pleasantly surprised me.
"I'll see you in a couple weeks, Gee. 'Member, my family has that barbecue on the fourth of July. You better be there!" said Matt, one of my closer friends. I told him I would be there, and went to say goodbye to everyone else.
After Nina, Matt, Mike, Sarah, Jocelyn, Shawn, Katie, Logan, and all my other friends and acquaintances were out of the way, I made my way to Bonnie's locker. We'd been best friends since Kindergarten, and we were closer than brother and sister. Since Mikey was only 5, I felt like I knew her better than I knew him.
Suddenly I felt a pair of hands cover my eyes.
I shrieked involuntarily. Of course, I knew it was her, but I was always tightly wound, and would jump at the drop of a pin.
I tried to get away, and I felt about 70 pounds, give or take, jump onto my back.
"Hey, Gee! Guess who!" she giggled.
"Liza?" I joked.
She laughed her cute little laugh again and hopped down.
"Its 10:30. I been here for an hour. Where ya been!" she demanded, pretending to be indignant.
"Bonnie, bella! Where have I been? Why, you of all people should know that I've been hunting for a rabbit skin to wrap my little Bonnie in!" I joked again. It was an old joke of ours. Since a young age we both had an odd obsession with Gone With The Wind and Clark Gable. Don't ask.
"Hah! Any plans for the summer?"
"Not really. I'll be taking care of Mikey a lot; my parents are going to Hawaii for a week, and we'll have an on-and-off babysitter. How about you?"
She shrugged, "Nothing but a week of camp in August," she made a face. She hated her camp and the baton that came with it; but her parents insisted. I had no idea why; she was good at so many other things, why baton? Where would it get her? It was a question we'd been asking her parents since second grade when they'd bought her a silver baton. She'd nearly set fire to it.
"Fun. When you get back, I want to see lots of pictures!" I teased. She hated her counselors and her campmates--and they hated her. I wished I could go with her to make it a little better, or a little more fun.
While this was all going on, we were slowly walking towards the front doors where her parents would pick her up, and I would begin my short walk home.
"How did your report card go?" she asked.
"Surprisingly well. Mostly all B's, except for a B minus. Not too bad, how about you?"
"In order, Choir, Art, Math, Language Arts, Gym, Science, and American History, A,A,B,A,D,D,C. It evens out," she shrugged. She never put much of a store by grades. She didn't want a real job; she wanted to be a singer, a dancer, an actress, a band mate, an artist, any kind of musician. All at once. Her body couldn't be everywhere, so her mind wanted to be; which made it so exciting to be her best friend. It was never a dull moment with my bella, Bonnie Marena Lombardi.
At this point, we heard a honk. A black SUV had pulled up, signaling that Bonnie had to go.
"I'll see you next year, Gerard. I'll miss you!" she said, hugging me tightly, "Promise you'll stay at this school, with me!"
"I promise, bella. See you next year," I said, hugging her back. She skipped off towards her parents' car, her wild black curls flying in the wind. I'd really miss her.
----
Back in the world of ninth grade, I'll bet you're thinking, "Yeah, so what? Get on with the damn story Gerard. What's so great about this girl?" And I shall tell you.
Over the years, fifth, sixth, seventh grade, my friends had started to sort of drift. Most of them. I was only invited to one birthday party a year--Bonnie's. And I was the only one she'd ever invite. Said nobody else would care enough if she did invite them, so she didn't bother. Anyways, my friends would start hanging out with older people, because they thought it made them look cool. The older kids would get them to do things they otherwise would never even dream of--bad things. I wasn't into that, so I shied away from it. People said I was uncool, that I was a pansy, so after a while, we all just stopped talking. I had no interest in hanging out with these people any longer, and as a result, I stuck to my own secluded corner at lunch and recess.
Again, you're thinking, "Gerard, yeah, I know that sucks, but SERIOUSLY. Get ON with it! HOW does she tie into all of this?" And once again, I shall explain.
---
Beginning of sixth grade
I walked down the hallways towards the auditorium, where we would be getting our pep talk for the year. I could see it was already half full, and almost all of the faces were familiar to me. I walked down the aisles, unnoticed by everyone, and tried to find a place to sit. Every time I saw an empty seat, the people sitting around it would look at me, look at each other, and place a bag or some other object onto the seat. It confused the shit out of me.
"Gerard!" I heard a high pitched, all too familiar voice call from the back.
Bonnie! I was so panicked when I couldn't find her at all at the front doors this morning. She was sitting in the middle of the row, an empty seat to her left. Her friends all stopped talking and looked at me, then looked at Bonnie like she was retarded. She waved me over, ignoring them.
"Hey, Bonnie! How was your summer?" I asked. I felt very uncomfortable with all her friends, dead silent, listening to our conversation. I could almost feel their contempt.
"Same old, same old. Sorry I wasn't at the front this morning, but I woke up way too late! I hope you didn't stick around for long?" she said, concerned.
"Nah," I lied, "I got here pretty late, too..."
We were shushed as the presentation began.
One boring hour later, we were ushered to our classrooms. I still had the same class with Bonnie, thank God. Everyone else hated me with a passion, and if I wasn't able to spend every in school moment with her.... well, let's just be glad I could.
The morning passed slowly, and when the bell rang for recess, everyone ran outside into the bright sunshine. Bonnie and I went to play tether ball, and everyone mostly avoided us.
In the middle of our game, we stopped as we heard a voice. A few voices, actually. Female voices.
"Bonnie, what are you doing?" Her friend Megan asked, with scorn in her voice.
"Playing tether ball," Bonnie replied icily without looking at them. She sent the ball towards me again.
"Why are you even talking to this loser?" the girl beside Megan asked.
"Because he's not a loser, and he's my friend," she said, beginning to get a little miffed.
There was silence for a moment, and all three girls, Megan and the two girls I didn't recognize, burst out laughing.
"Ah, Bonnie, we thought you were serious for a second... Now come on, let's go to the jungle gym," said Megan.
Instead of hitting the ball back to me, Bonnie caught it, and turned around.
"No, Megan, I don't want to go with you. I'm happy playing tether ball with my best friend here, and if you'd like to join us, feel free. If not, get lost," she said, her voice rising.
"You're making a big mistake, Bonnie. Nobody will want to talk to someone who hangs out with a loser. Especially a loser as big as him," one of the other girls said with a sneer.
"He's not a loser!" Bonnie suddenly shrieked. I jumped a little. Bonnie, no matter how bouncy and hyper she was, never, ever raised her voice.
"I don't know what your problem is, but leave us alone! You don't know Gerard like I do, and you're lucky I don't walk over there and knock you on your ass!" This also shocked me. Bonnie had never sworn in her whole life. Hell, I had never sworn, at that age. I just stood there stupidly, staring at fiery little Bonnie, with a tether ball clenched in her small hands.
Her old friends gasped. They were as shocked as I was to see Bonnie like this, and they weren't sure how to react. Finally, one of the girls I didn't know started walking closer to my little friend.
"I don't think a little person like you should be able to get away with saying stuff like that, Bonnie. Especially not to her friends," her voice had a sinister tone to it. I started to get worried.
"What are you going to do, Sarah? Tell on me?" Bonnie retorted, standing at her full four foot ten inches. She wasn't afraid of this girl, who stood about two and a half heads taller than her.
Sarah pushed Bonnie backwards, and she lost her balance. When I saw her hit the ground, I got angry. There wasn't much I could do to a girl, but I would do what I could.
"Leave her alone!" I screamed at Sarah, moving towards her.
"Hey look, the loser's talking to me! I didn't know they could talk!" Sarah taunted.
"I'm serious Sarah, get away from us," I said, trying to keep calm. It wasn't really working.
"What are you going to do? Hit a girl?"
No. Of course I wouldn't. You weren't supposed to do that. Even a 12 year old boy like me knows that. Even if they asked for it. Right?
I stood beside the sitting Bonnie, about a foot in front of Sarah. Standing straight, Bonnie barely reached my shoulder, whereas Sarah came up about even with me. Just as I was telling myself I couldn't hit a girl, I looked down. Bonnie was focusing on the tether ball, but I could see the small tear drops on her sleeves.
Not hit a girl? I would hit whoever the hell I felt like!
I picked up the tether ball, and with a little yell I chucked it at Sarah. It knocked her glasses clean off her face. She stumbled back and looked stunned. She wasn't expecting me to actually do something. The other two girls ran away, and Sarah picked up her glasses as she turned to do the same. But before she turned, I was satisfied to see tears streaming down her face. I should have felt ashamed, but I didn't. All I could feel was pain wrenching my heart for the pitiful Bonnie, crying, on the ground beside me. I turned and picked small Bonnie up.
"Are you okay?" I asked, cradling her to me.
She sniffled and nodded, then she looked at me with a small smile, and adoration shining in her big green eyes.
"You really nailed her, didn't ya, Gee?" she said, almost giggling.
"I sure did. Just for you, bella. Are you real hurt?" I asked softly.
"No... Not anymore," she added, smiling brightly.
"Let's go sit on the bench and watch the kickball game," I suggested. I put her down and as she turned to walk towards the kickball field, I saw her little elbow, scraped and smeared with blood.
"Bonnie, you're bleeding!" I said suddenly.
"I am? Where?" she asked, alarmed.
"Your elbow. Come on, let's go clean it up! Does it hurt?"
"Well, no. I didn't even notice it. But now that you mention it... Eew."
I laughed. She was so damn cute sometimes.
We went into our classroom, where at the back corner there was a sink and paper towels for after art class. I cleaned her elbow off, and she shrieked as the warm water hit the tender scrape. She didn't feel it before, but she certainly could now. It also appeared to be pretty deep. I almost couldn't do it.
After it was clean, I got a band-aid out of the First Aid Kit hanging on the wall. I stuck it on and gave my little 'sister's' elbow a kiss.
"Better?" I asked.
"Better," she agreed, smiling and hugging me.
"And don't worry, Gerard, I'd rather have you as a friend and a big brother than the whole school. The whole entire world, even!" she said earnestly.
And I believed her.
---
And maybe now, friends, you can understand just why I love this girl so much. She sacrificed her many friends just for me, just so she could continue being around me. And I know that if the situation had been reversed, I would have done the exact same for her.
Because--I'll say it one more time-- I love her, just that much.