Is tú mo ghrá
Slán go fóill
Chapter two - Slán go fóill, goodbye for now
*Elliot's POV*
I wish I didn't have to leave deep down inside, I tell Celina that I'm happy to leave so I wont be a burden anymore. She told me that I was being selfish and should think how Harley feels. She always trys to defend him and I know I've done wrong by making him fall in love with me, but that's just me and I've always been like that. He doesn't love me anymore, and he made that very clear, I doubt he was ever in love with me in the first place.
Right now I'm thinking about how he feels. Glad to be rid of me, happy he can finally have a clean flat and I suppose he wont have to worry about me anymore.
I don't have the guts to say goodbye to Harley, it'd just kill me inside because I never want to leave him. I went into his room and just stared at him, he looks like a lost angel, so helpless and sweet. I can't believe I'm about to leave him, he was the only good thing in my life and now I have nothing. I have nothing to offer and I'm just no good to anyone anymore. Celina will never forgive me for leaving them and Harley will never forgive me for loving him.
I can't do this anymore. I'm lying to myself by staying here.
China's door is painted blue with yellow stars and the top left window has cracks in it, evidence of a small object thrown at it. The house itself is still painted brilliant white, she's opened all the windows and I can hear Dad's radio from outside.
My hands are shaking as I knock on the door, I can't believe I'm back here, the house I grew up in and left too young. Chakra, my 11 year old brother answered the door.
"Hello?"
"It's me!" I smiled
"No, Elliot?" I nodded " Really! Oh my God, come in!" He noticed my suitcase and smiled the biggest smile I've ever seen him do. He was always a smiley and polite child.
China was in the garden sitting on the patio, the second she saw me she got up and slowly walked over. The look in her eyes was almost sympathetic.
"What boy has deserted you now?" She sighed and hugged me. I told her everything, how me and the guy who took me in fell in love and how we'd had a wild night. And how he refused to talk to me because he refused to believe he was in love with a guy so blew up on me. She just sighed at me again and carried my bag up to my old bedroom. It didn't look the same as when I was a child. All the posters had been taken down and my bed had been moved, but the swirls and splatters of paint were still there. I painted them when I was 13 and I wanted to paint my room to change it from light blue. The black splatters were from when I was angry, looking back now I was an inwardly violent child. From the age of about 10 I was never really a child I guess, I got into all the bad things way too early, I could never handle myself. I have calmed down now, I can handle my drugs and I take them in moderation. I have made a promise to Harley that I will never go back to heroin and I will never smoke crystal again.
This brings back so many memories of sleepless nights locked in my bedroom by my father in one of his drunken rages because he had caught me drinking. I still remember our staggerings, him shouting and pushing me towards the door and me swearing and spreading out my arms against the door frame. Or memories of guys I brought home with me when I stayed at my parents, only about three names spring to mind.
Sitting in my bedroom it dawned on me how much I'd taken my mother for granted, she was always there for me despite how high or drunk I was. I'm going to turn out just like my father if I even live that long, she has to put up with him and now me as well. I want to go sober but I just can't do it.
I'm Elliot, I'm 17 years old and I'm an alcoholic.
*Harley's POV*
He's gone. I can't believe what I've done.
I just exploded on him. I was furious with myself and I took it out on him. It wasn't his fault, it was never his fault.
He left a note.
'My Harley,
I'll never forget you but it's obvious I have to leave
I love you so much and I'll never forget you.
Elliot x'
He called me his. His Harley.
He's never called me his. I'm making a big deal out of it really.
He could of at least said goodbye to my face. I want him to stay so badly I don't know how I'm going to cope without him.
*Elliot's POV*
I wish I didn't have to leave deep down inside, I tell Celina that I'm happy to leave so I wont be a burden anymore. She told me that I was being selfish and should think how Harley feels. She always trys to defend him and I know I've done wrong by making him fall in love with me, but that's just me and I've always been like that. He doesn't love me anymore, and he made that very clear, I doubt he was ever in love with me in the first place.
Right now I'm thinking about how he feels. Glad to be rid of me, happy he can finally have a clean flat and I suppose he wont have to worry about me anymore.
I don't have the guts to say goodbye to Harley, it'd just kill me inside because I never want to leave him. I went into his room and just stared at him, he looks like a lost angel, so helpless and sweet. I can't believe I'm about to leave him, he was the only good thing in my life and now I have nothing. I have nothing to offer and I'm just no good to anyone anymore. Celina will never forgive me for leaving them and Harley will never forgive me for loving him.
I can't do this anymore. I'm lying to myself by staying here.
China's door is painted blue with yellow stars and the top left window has cracks in it, evidence of a small object thrown at it. The house itself is still painted brilliant white, she's opened all the windows and I can hear Dad's radio from outside.
My hands are shaking as I knock on the door, I can't believe I'm back here, the house I grew up in and left too young. Chakra, my 11 year old brother answered the door.
"Hello?"
"It's me!" I smiled
"No, Elliot?" I nodded " Really! Oh my God, come in!" He noticed my suitcase and smiled the biggest smile I've ever seen him do. He was always a smiley and polite child.
China was in the garden sitting on the patio, the second she saw me she got up and slowly walked over. The look in her eyes was almost sympathetic.
"What boy has deserted you now?" She sighed and hugged me. I told her everything, how me and the guy who took me in fell in love and how we'd had a wild night. And how he refused to talk to me because he refused to believe he was in love with a guy so blew up on me. She just sighed at me again and carried my bag up to my old bedroom. It didn't look the same as when I was a child. All the posters had been taken down and my bed had been moved, but the swirls and splatters of paint were still there. I painted them when I was 13 and I wanted to paint my room to change it from light blue. The black splatters were from when I was angry, looking back now I was an inwardly violent child. From the age of about 10 I was never really a child I guess, I got into all the bad things way too early, I could never handle myself. I have calmed down now, I can handle my drugs and I take them in moderation. I have made a promise to Harley that I will never go back to heroin and I will never smoke crystal again.
This brings back so many memories of sleepless nights locked in my bedroom by my father in one of his drunken rages because he had caught me drinking. I still remember our staggerings, him shouting and pushing me towards the door and me swearing and spreading out my arms against the door frame. Or memories of guys I brought home with me when I stayed at my parents, only about three names spring to mind.
Sitting in my bedroom it dawned on me how much I'd taken my mother for granted, she was always there for me despite how high or drunk I was. I'm going to turn out just like my father if I even live that long, she has to put up with him and now me as well. I want to go sober but I just can't do it.
I'm Elliot, I'm 17 years old and I'm an alcoholic.
*Harley's POV*
He's gone. I can't believe what I've done.
I just exploded on him. I was furious with myself and I took it out on him. It wasn't his fault, it was never his fault.
He left a note.
'My Harley,
I'll never forget you but it's obvious I have to leave
I love you so much and I'll never forget you.
Elliot x'
He called me his. His Harley.
He's never called me his. I'm making a big deal out of it really.
He could of at least said goodbye to my face. I want him to stay so badly I don't know how I'm going to cope without him.
♠ ♠ ♠
took me a day to write.sorry it's so short, it's just a filler really
if you don't know what's going on between these two guys you'll catchon soon (:
comments?
love yas
x