Trust Me

Bob's point of view

Blurred shapes swam before my eyes. My body felt heavy, my brain foggy. I blinked hard and Ray's smiling face slowly came into focus.

"You alright there buddy?" he asked. I became aware I was laying on the floor of the hallway of our house.

I blinked again and looked around. The lounge was full of people, all of whom were staring at me. I looked back at Ray.

"I'm fine. Had a weird dream," I said, hurrying to get to my feet. Ray helped me up and kissed my cheek tenderly.

"Well, it wasn't the start to this party we'd planned, but welcome home Bob!" said Frank, flashing a rare smile. Everyone raised their glasses, but I was hardly paying attention.

I was confused. My dream had felt so real, I was certain it had been.

"Are you alright?" asked Ray. I puled him into a hug.

"I'm just fine now," I said, smiling into his neck and breathing in the smell of his aftershave.

Passing out had given me a jolt and a scare, but I wasn't going to let it ruin being home at long last.

"Do you know why you passed out? Does your head hurt or anything?" he asked caringly, hands rubbing my back through my shirt.

"I think I was just shocked you had thrown me a party," I smiled. I was feeling more at ease now, the horrible feeling I'd felt in my stomach after the dream had faded. The dream had made me realize that I needed Ray more than I thought, and when I thought our life together had been erased it was a truly horrible feeling.

"How long was I out?" I asked, pulling back from the hug.

"Not long, about a minute. You scared me Bob," he said, one hand on each side of my face.

I looked into his big, brown eyes and felt my heart melt.

"You don't need to be scared anymore, I'm all better now," I said softly.

My hands found the back of his neck and our foreheads almost touched. His eyes were full of love, and concern and compassion. The gap between our foreheads slowly closed, my hands trailed down his back to rest near his hips. As our foreheads touched so did our lips.

I felt like electricity had just jolted through my body. Our lips moved against one-anothers and my heart started to pound. I pulled him closer, so our bodies touched as much as possible.

"Uh... guys...?" Mikey tapped me on the shoulder.

"Shut up Mikey I'm busy," I mumbled into Rays lips. Ray pulled back.

"Bob, go and see everyone else. There's food in the kitchen too, real food, not hospital food. You need to see everyone else, I'm here all the time," said Ray, though sadness was tinting his voice. We both just wanted 'couple time' after having had our marriage so rudely interrupted by my illness.

I sighed and wandered off, listening to Mikey's nagging and going to talk to some other people. I mingled amongst the guests, many of whom I hadn't seen since our wedding day, conversation was strained as there were only a few topics people seemed to want to talk about which were:
My illness,
How Angel was doing and how we felt about losing Ben,
and Gerard.

Three topics which I was trying to avoid like the plague. It wasn't that I didn't want to seem happy about my recovery, it was more the fact that it seemed somehow tainted by the fact that Gerard was missing it. And the fact that Angel still wasn't home, let alone that we had lost Ben was just too tender to approach.

"You can really feel he's missing, you know?" said Brian, coming up behind me.

"Oh hey Brian," I said, shaking his hand. I hadn't seen Brian, our manager, for a while, although we spoke occasionally on the phone.

"Yeah, I know, its like Christmas without the tree," I said sadly. Gerard's disappearance was a huge worry to all of us, and though we knew the right people were looking for him, it was still hard to cope with. Added to this was the fact that Frank was like a broken man, so it was as if we had lost two friends, not just one. Mikey was taking it surprisingly well.

"He'll come back, when he's ready," said Brian.

"Yeah. Listen, I don't want to talk about it," I said, trying not to sound too rude.

"I understand, It's good to see you looking so healthy again," he said, clapping me on the shoulder and walking over to Ray and Mikey.

I quickly glanced the room, and I couldn't see Frank. Following my gut I headed upstairs to his room and knocked his door gently.

"Frank?" I asked quietly. I could hear him crying.

I opened the door and entered the room to see him sitting Indian style on his bed, face shining with tears, staring at the drawing Gerard had used to propose.

"Please, l-leave me alone," he sobbed.

I didn't say anything, I simply crossed the room and put my arms around him in a comforting embrace.

"We'll find him, Frankie, I know we will."

"B-but I n-need him now!" Frank wailed.

"Shh, it's gonna be OK," He buried his face into my shoulder, and I stroked his hair and rubbed his back. He hadn't closed the curtains and I could see it was beginning to rain heavily outside. A flash of lightning suddenly fractured the sky. I quickly shut the curtains, knowing that Frank hates storms.

After a few minutes Frank had calmed down and we went back downstairs. It was obvious he had been crying, and thankfully nobody asked any questions.

I kept a close eye on Frank for the rest of the evening, making sure he wasn't on his own at all. Ray had obviously picked up on what I was doing and was trying to help me keep Frank happy and his mind distracted from thoughts of Gerard. I knew we had to find Gerard, and for Franks sake it had to be soon.

Not a moment too soon people started leaving. I felt so rude, as my attention was not fully on the party and the people around me, but on my concern for Frank and my wanting to spend time alone with Ray. We hadn't even held each other properly in weeks, I was desperate just to be close to him again.

Over the next half an hour people left, seeming not to sense my urgency to get them all out of my house so I could be with my husband and Frank.

"Thanks for coming man," I said, hugging Bilie-Joe from Green Day goodbye. The band had come all the way from California, which was really nice of them.

"No problem, now you just keep yourself healthy. No drugs, cigarettes, booze, prostitutes, junk food, or masturbation, cause that shit makes you blind," he said, laughing as he watched Mike struggling to get a drunken Tre up off the couch.

"Yeah, I'll try. No promises on the booze front though," I said, nodding at the glass of champagne I had in my hand.

"Well, in moderation. I want you clean living as possible!"

"Yes sir," I said sarcastically.

"Have fun on the plane with drunkard!" called Ray.

"I like planes," slurred Tre as he staggered out of the house being supported by Mike. They walked down the driveway into the stormy night towards their car. A flash of lightning illuminated the sky and Tre screamed loudly, falling to the ground from the shock.

I laughed and shook my head, closing the door behind them, the last people to leave.

A pair of strong arms wrapped themselves around my waist from behind, and a pair of soft lips began kissing my neck.

"Finally," I mumbled, turning around and wrapping my arms around Ray's neck.

"I know right, I didn't think this would go on for this long."

I looked into his eyes and smiled, my glance flicking down to his lips for just a moment, and then looking back into his eyes. He smirked.

"I know what you want," he said, kissing me softly.

"And whats that?" I asked.

"Come upstairs and I'll tell you," he said, leading me by the hand up to our bedroom.

The second we were through the door things became very heated. Rays hands ran up and down my sides as we kissed furiously, my hands remained on his ass, squeezing tightly. I walked backwards as Ray walked forwards and we ended up on our bed, Ray on top of me and our bodies grinding together.

"Oh, sorry," came a voice from the doorway.

Ray and I both looked round to see a tearstained Frank stood in our doorway, his pillow in his hand and wearing his pajamas. He looked just like a heavily tatooed little boy.

"Can I sleep in your bed? I'm scared of the storm," he said, standing there doing his puppy dog eyes and looking truly pathetic.

Ray sighed and rolled off me.

"Come on then," I said, patting the side of the bed next to me. I leaned across and shut off the lights in the room using the bedside switch.

Frank ignored me and walked around to the foot of the bed and climbed in, nestling himself between Ray and I.

"Uh uh! No. No way. Its my first night home and I at least want to spoon if you're going to take sex off the table," I protested. I heard Ray sigh again.

"You shouldn't have sex on the table Bob, its unhygenic," said Frank smugly.

"You know what I meant," I said, poking him in the ribs.

There was a bright flash of lightning followed in quick succession by a clap of thunder. Frank grabbed me and cowered into my neck.

"Uh.. Frank. My husband is in the bed with us."

Ray responded by grabbing Frank from behind and pulling both of us into a hug, Frank squashed in the middle.

"AAAAAAAAHHHH RAY GET OFF ME YOU HAVE A BONER!" Frank squealed loudly, wriggling and accidently allowing his knee to collide with a sensitive area of mine.

"Oh my god Bob I'm so sorry!" He blurted out quickly.

"Its OK. Just keep still. And go to sleep," I said through gritted teeth.

Frank settled down and fell asleep quickly. He was hard work sometimes, but I knew most of his problems were because of Gerard being missing. He was obviously lonely as Gee would always shower him with attention. I didn't like to think of how Frank will take it when Angel comes home and the focus is all on her.

I couldn't wait for Angel to be home and to start our life as a family. I used to sit and daydream when I was in the hospital about her coming home.

I wanted Ray and I to start our little family together, and after everything that had happened this year, I was even more determined for it to happen.

"Psst, Bob?" came Rays voice through the darkness.

"Yeah?" I whispered back.

"Its nice having you home," he said.

I smiled to myself.

"Its nice to be home."

"Remember that day, way back when you were.. ill the first time, when I told you'd beat this and you told me you wouldn't?"

"Yeah, I remember," I said, knowing exactly what was coming.

"I told you so!" he whisper yelled.

I was so glad in that moment that he was right. That I did get better. That everything did work out in the end. Amongst everything bad that had happened in the past 18 months, looking back, I felt that I had come out pretty well.

Its hard to fully comprehend how much you fully appreciate things like family, friends and good health, until they are on the brink of being taken from you. And I appreciate now. Vowing to treasure every minute of my life, I sat up and leaned over to Ray, awkwardly, because of Frank being in the way.

I placed my right hand on the side of his face, my thumb gently stroking his cheek.

"I love you," I said, leaning in to softly kiss his lips.

"I love you more," he said, grinning. I couldn't see it, but I could feel it. He was grinning.

"Love you Frankie," he said, patting Frank on the head. He stirred slightly but remained asleep.

"Love you man," I said, kissing his temple gently.

My hand found Ray's, and they linked across Franks chest as the three of us settled into a peaceful and contented sleep, hopeful for the future to come.

THE END