Road To Acceptance

I couldn’t sleep all night. The constant beating against the wall at 3 in the morning drove me insane. And that one little thought about who the hell this Billie was, bugged the shit out of me. Also, I was laying in the middle of the living room with just my bag as my pillow. You wouldn’t sleep well either.
It was about 5 when I actually got to sleep. I naturally wake up early anyways so it was 8 when I woke up. I sat in the living room and thought of what I should do. Shower’s are good...
The cold water scared the living shit out of me when it hit my back. I immediately leaned against the wall to avoid the water until it warmed up. I shouldn’t even take a shower, this guy will be disgusted enough by the way I look. I got some shampoo that I stole from the a gas station before I left Phoenix. I poured it into my hands, the smell of lavender and daisies filled the shower and I closed my eyes as I rinses it out. Shortly afterwards I got out and realized I didn’t have a towel. I rinsed my hair dry with my dirty shirt. I put on a white torn Ramones shirt, cut light Levi’s and rustled my hair. I went to go sit in the living room again and heard some guy yelling into his phone.

“Well what the fuck, I went to 27D and the asshole nearly beat the shit out of me. I swear to fucking god Mike if you’re playing a joke on me..” The man spoke strong and a little intimidating.
“Well what the fuck I did go down the hall!” His footsteps getting closer to my room and stopping. He belched into the phone and kept walking down the hall.
I sat their putting on my socks and looking through my bag for eyeliner. This all seemed almost too entertaining to me. I put on eyeliner and heard a loud bang on the door instantly. I rolled my eyes and let him decide to turn the knob and find out it was unlocked.
“You better open this door Sidnee.”
I smirked. “Help yourself Bill.” I finished putting on eyeliner as he opened the door dumbly and stood above me. I ignored him and looked through my bag once more for my chapstick. I found it and as I was spreading it on he spoke.
“I like your shirt.” He sat down across from me. I didn’t look at him once. He continued talking. “How do you know my name?” The kid, desperate for attention sat their staring at me for answers.
“Why should it matter, you’re here aren’t you? You’re gonna do the fucked up shit I could only imagine some prick like you would do anyways? So what do you want from me besides...” I sat down my bag and layed down on it.
“Is that what all this is about?” Billie asked softly. “Who the hell said I was here for..” His voice cracked. He was innocent. I sat up.
“Mike said you were here to come and sleep with me since I guess you haven’t gotten laid in awhile.” I scratched my leg and looked him over. Blonde curly hair. It was short enough, but he had a few matted pieces, which I’m assuming were his pathetic excuse for dreads.
“Well you don’t look like a whore.”
That’s when I left, leaving his unconscious body in my living room. I left a cigarette on his chest. Giving Mike that hint of where I’ll be at.

I ordered a green tea and sat down. I pulled out my headset and listened to my mix tape. Operation Ivy blasted in my headsets, I sipped my tea, read a magazine and relaxed. I felt good and unoccupied. Just what I’ve needed. If only I had a lighter.
Again; I spoke too soon. Mike walked in and sat next to me, just like how it was in the beginning. He lifted my headsets off my head like how any father role would do to their adolescent daughter in those shitty (over dramatic) movies.
“Can I talk to you outside?” Mike whispered faintly.
“What so you can scold me about kicking Billie’s ass for calling me a whore?!” I said it perfectly loud enough just so everyone’s attention was on Mike and I. I smiled.
“What the hell is your problem, just come outside with me. It shouldn’t be an option.” He know put a tightened grip on my shoulder.
“Who the hell do you think you are, my father?” I asked rudely. With that, he tugged me outside, causing my to spill my tea everywhere and trip over my bag. He pushed me against the alley wall where Billie and some other undescribable guy were sitting.
“I outta give you a piece of my mind for giving Billie a fucking broken jaw AND for embarrassing me like that in that damn coffee shop!”
I couldn’t help but smile a smug grin. I took a deep breath, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “Do it.”
He looked over at Billie, then back to me. He let go of me.
“Find your own damn house girl. I’m done with your shit.” He walked down the alley to talk to Billie and his friend.
“Cool. That’s all I needed. You guys were too sketchy anyways.” I scoffed and shoved my hands into my pockets. “And to think I thought you were hot. I’m out of my fucking mind!”
I flipped them off and went inside. I apologized to the coffee shop for the disruption. I even tipped them 5 bucks for cleaning up the mess I made. I left and saw Billie sitting outside with the lighter in his lap. I walked past him and he called back to me.
“Hey look I’m sorry.” His voice almost at a pleading whimper.
I turned around and faced him. “Yeah, well shit happens.” I sat next to him and grabbed the lighter from his lap. He flinched. I smirked and looked in my bag for my cigs.
“Want one?” I asked him. He didn’t look up, but he nodded.
I handed one to him, already lit, and he inhaled.
“Can I take you out to lunch?”
I coughed out all my smoke and looked to him. “What the hell, why?” I managed to say in between coughs.
“Because I feel terrible about earlier and I would love to make it up to you. I shouldn’t have said that comment about you being a whore. I mean..” He looked up at me. “You really are pretty.”
It echoed through my ears, my head, my body. I haven’t heard such a remark for years. It didn’t faze me though. Not the least.
“Dude, I broke your fucking jaw, you’re calling me pretty, and you wanna take me out to lunch?” I inhaled and quickly blew out.
“What do you say? You can see the real me. It won’t be a complete asshole all day. I can be different sometimes.” He smiled. His teeth crooked and a little bit chipped.
“I guess but if I see Mike, I’m leaving.”
“Well don’t worry about that. He’s really not mad.”
I gave him an unsure look. “What do you mean he’s not mad?”
“He’s just...not mad. Mike doesn’t get mad. His fuse doesn’t stay lit, if you catch my drift. He was just defending me and trying to get his point across that he doesn’t like when people fuck with his friends.”
“I see well - ” I flicked the cigarette.
“Oh, and he said you could really have the apartment. He’ll talk to you later about it.”
“Why the hell couldn’t he talk to me himself?”
“Because he had to run some errands with Tre.”
“Okay. Well let’s get out of here Billie -“
“Billie Joe Armstrong.” He smiled and stuck out his hand.
I shook it and smiled back. Relief sweeped over me and we walked down the street to one of the famous deli’s of downtown Oakland.