This Is What Happens When Love Meets Destruction

Although I was tired and felt as if I were on the verge of falling asleep, I smiled down at the sight of my youngest son resting comfortably in Jack's arms. He's been really quiet for the most part, blinking his brown eyes that he had inherited from his father slowly, taking in all the sights around him. It's been three days and we still haven't been able to think of a name for him, so my brothers, feeling that they were responsible for thinking up a nickname, have started referring to him as Tiny Man because of how small he is.

His brother - whom the boys have started referring to as Jack Attack ... don't ask - is bigger than him, but he is still being held in the ICU. Although my son lying before me was the smallest of the three children that I had carried, he seems to be the strongest.

Jack whispered a few incoherent words, but apparently our son was able to understand him because his eyes lit up ever so slightly and what looked to be the making of a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. Jack laughed softly in response and reached over, running his fingertips gently across our son's forehead, brushing his tuff of dark hair aside.

"Ryan James." He muttered.

"Hmm?"

"That's what we should name him, Ryan James Barakat." Jack whispered.

"Ryan James," I repeated. Thinking to myself for a little while, I nodded my head. "I like that. Ryan James Barakat it is."

With my words, Jack smiled widely and then carefully lifted Ryan up, kissing his forehead gently. Watching them, I felt the stupid emotional tears forming in my eyes, but I quickly blinked them away before Jack caught sight of them. He's been fussing over me every single second from the moment I woke up from surgery, only stopping to hold Ryan, and I know that if he saw me crying, he'd start fussing again with a vengeance.

"I'll tell the nurses that we finally decided on a name." Jack said. "But, we have to think of a name for his brother."

"Did you have any names in mind?"

"Well," Jack hesitated, rocking Ryan slightly before he looked up at me, "I was sort of thinking of something that has Alex, or Alexander, in it." He said quietly. "I mean ... Alex is my best friend, and he did save your life." He pointed out.

"Yeah," I whispered, "he did. I don't remember any of it, but he did."

"Do you think he'd mind?" Jack asked slowly.

I let out a sudden laugh, but winced slightly when it hurt my chest. "Knowing Alex, he'd be pretty flattered if we named our son after him." I wheezed, "He wouldn't mind."

"We need another name, though." Jack said softly. "He can have Alexander as his middle name."

Yawning softly, I leaned over and rested my head on Jack's shoulder. Carefully, he shifted Ryan so that he was cradling him with one arm, while he wrapped his other arm around me. Sitting in silence for a couple of minutes, I listened to the steady sound of his heartbeat. Jack told me that three days ago when he had received the call that Alex and I had been involved in a car wreck, his heart had actually stopped. He said that it wasn't like anything they described in books, or movies. He said that he honestly didn't think it would ever start again.

It amazed me to think that something - a sort of big something that I didn't even remember happening - would have the ability to do that to him. I never thought I'd ever mean so much to him, as I did. To make someone's heart stop by merely tell them that the fate of their loved one lay in the hands of medical experts, its sort of crazy. I know that when you love someone, it's expected that this reaction would be typical, but knowing something and seeing it for yourself are two completely different things.

I didn't think I meant that much to anyone to affect them physiologically without even touching them. But apparently, I did mean that much to Jack.

"Eli," I whispered.

"What's that, babe?" Jack asked.

"Eli Alexander Barakat." I told him. "That's his brother's name."

"I like it." Jack agreed. "I'm sure that the nurses will be stoked that we finally named them, instead of the nurses referring to them as Barakat 1 and Barakat 2."

"No way," I grinned, "is that how they really refer to them?"

Jack laughed, and nodded his head slightly. "That's what I heard one nurse calling them."

"Oh my goodness, that's great." I smiled.

Jack snickered softly, and opened his mouth to say something else but the door opened and my usual nurse, Vicky, walked in.

"Hey guys," she said, greeting us with a warm smile, "I'm sorry, but it's time for us to take his vitals."

"His name is Ryan James Barakat." Jack said proudly. "And his brother is Eli Alexander Barakat."

"Ryan and Eli? Cute." Vicky grinned. "Maybe later on if I have time I can bring in the paperwork so that we'll have it officially in the hospital records."

Seeing that she was preparing to take Ryan back to the nursery, I reached over, gently caressing his arm. Tearing his eyes from Jack, he looked up at me, his eyes lighting up just like Jack's did. Without warning, a small, happy tear fell from my eye and I quietly asked Jack to lift him up so that I could kiss his cheek.

"I love you, sweetheart," I whispered to him, "I'll see you in a few hours."

"He and Eli are such cuties." Vicky said softly as either of us watched Jack say goodbye to his son.

"How is Eli?" I asked.

"He's doing good," Vicky said truthfully, "he's not breathing quite as well as we'd like him to so that's the main reason why he's in the ICU."

"And his heart?" I whispered, knowing that the doctors had mainly been afraid that his heart was simply too weak to function.

"His heart looks great, sweetheart." Vicky smiled.

Feeling my emotions starting to tug at my heartstrings, I simply offered a smile in response, knowing that if I tried to speak at that moment, my voice would fail me. Vicky carefully took Ryan in her arms, and exchanged a few more words with Jack about the forms she would bring in for us, before she left, taking Ryan back to where he belonged.

After she left, Jack and I sat there in a comfortable silence. Someone had opened my curtains earlier in the morning, and now the sun was just the right spot in the sky to peak directly into my room. I squinted slightly and then closed my eyes to keep the light from irritating my sight, but it only resulted in me realizing how tired I actually was.

"Sweetheart?" Jack whispered.

"I'm tired." I muttered. "I wish Mistoffelees were here to lay with me."

"I think I'm going to run home, wash up, and then stop by my parents' house to give them an update." He said as he gently ran his fingers through my hair. "Is that okay with you?"

"Absolutely not."

"Do you need anything at the house?" He continued, knowing that I didn't care what he did.

"See if you can sneak a bottle of JD into my room." I suggested. "My body is all achey. I want some Jack and coke to help relax me."

I felt him shift slightly, and then his arm slid out from behind my back. A split second later, his body warmth disappeared and the bed creaked slightly as he stood up. "If I get caught, I'll get into trouble; I'm not 21 yet." He reminded me.

"Pussy."

"Alright, I'm leaving. You've reached the point of verbal abuse and I can't take it anymore."

Forcing open an eye, I looked up at him and was met with an amused smirk. A tired smile tugged at the corners of my mouth, but I didn't have the energy to let it spread across my lips.

"I love you," I whispered.

"Love you too." He replied, and then leaned over, kissing my lips softly.

He pulled away, and back up towards the door, a smile on his face as he eyed me. "Stay out of trouble, Vinnie." He insisted.

"Jack and coke," I replied. "Lots of it."

My fiancé rolled his eyes, his smile still on his face, before he turned around and disappeared out the door. I gazed upon the spot he had once stood as if expecting him to walk back in, before I finally gave into the desire of my body and closed my eyes. A few seconds later, I heard the door open again, and I automatically assumed that it was Jack. I didn't have the energy to open my eyes again, though, and I drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up, I still felt tired but I had a lot more energy than I did early. I yawned quietly before I opened my eyes, blinking them slowly so that I could focus on the room around me. The sun had since set, and the skies were turning dark in the distance, so the main source of light in my room came from the fluorescents on the ceiling.

"You've been asleep for days," a familiar voice commented.

Turning my head, I saw Alex sitting in the arm chair beside my bed. "Hey, stranger." I greeted him. "It seems like I've barely seen you these past couple of days."

"I've been here to see you," he said, "but most of the time you've been sleeping." He told me. Sighing quietly, he motioned to the small table behind him, where a pretty bouquet of yellow roses was sitting in a vase. "I brought you those to lighten up your room." He said simply.

"Thank you," I smiled, "they're beautiful."

Alex nodded his head once before lowering his gaze down to the tiled floor. I watched as he sketched a random pattern onto the floor with his shoe and couldn't help but frown softly, knowing that something was bugging him.

"Alex, I have something to tell you." I said.

As I watched, Alex froze momentarily, his body tensing and then relaxing all within the time frame of a second. "Oh?"

"Yeah."

Alex remained starting at the floor, determined not to look up at me. "Well ... what is it?"

"Come here, goof," I said, holding my hand out to him, "I can't tell you when you're sitting on the other side of the room."

Alex opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it and stood up, making his way toward me. Taking my hand in his, he squeezed it tightly and then sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Jack and I named the boys." I told him quietly.

"Yeah?" He smiled. "What'd you guys decide on?"

"Ryan James and Eli Alexander." I whispered. "Jack wanted to name Eli after you because you," I hesitated, swallowing down the emotions in my throat, "because you were there for me." I finished.

"Really?" He whispered back. "You ... named him after me?"

"Don't act like you're not flattered, Gaskarth." I smirked.

"Well, I am pretty flattered, but, I certainly didn't expect this." He smiled. "I had thought that you were," he paused, shaking his head as the smile disappeared momentarily, "never mind." He mumbled.

"You thought that I what?" I asked.

"Nothing," he said, his smile once again on his lips. "Say ... Vinnie?"

"What, Alex?"

Alex's grip on my hand tightened. "You really don't ... remember anything from the wreck, do you?" He asked slowly.

"Oh," I frowned, "no, I don't. The last thing I remember before waking up in the hospital was that I was going to ask you if you heard those sirens in the distance. Why? Did something else happen?"

"Oh, no," he said, shaking his head.

"Alex, why do you look so sad?" I whispered.

"It's just ... I was so scared when I realized what happened." He said quietly. "You were so pale, and there was blood all over the place. I've never been so scared in my entire life."

"Oh," I muttered.

Not knowing what else to say, I simply sat there, holding his hand while he stared off into the distance. I honestly don't remember what happened after the wreck, but the way Alex has been acting, I have a feeling that there's something else he hasn't told us.