It's Not As Easy As It Looks

Waking up to a hammer smashing down on his head, Billie Joe let out a load groan and rolled over in his bed, but when he knocked into someone, he felt a strange sense of panic riding through his body as everything started shooting back to him.

Shaking, he lifted his hand up to his face to look at the shining ring on his wedding finger.

“Fuck.”

***

2nd January, 2007.

I sat on the end of my bed, hands deeply imbedded into my dark brown hair. I sniffed and choked a little from the after effects of a nostalgic nightmare.

I thought back to the dream, at how cruel it was. It was about my parents fighting; but this wasn’t exactly a nightmare because it happened a lot in my old house.

I fought back tears as I wiped my eyes and stared at the white rug below my feet. I pressed my feet down and stood up, looking around the room—it suddenly becoming my old bedroom when a string of old memories came back to haunt me.

Inhaling the thick, intoxicating fumes of my home, my father lit up another cigarette. He was pissed off, no, he was beyond pissed off.

I was a mere age of fifteen, and just like any hormonal teenager I was generally depressed. I sat in my room as I listened to the howls of my parents fighting over and over again about all the same old stupid things.

It made me wonder if I would be like this, I hoped not. But I couldn’t change, not now.

It was another rageful day, full of tears and bloodshed, and it would continue like this because my mother was too scared to leave, and I was too scared to say anything.

I hated this.

As the room spun I managed to sit myself down on the bed to breathe again.

This kept happening—all of a sudden old memories would flood my vision and take over everything, it was really starting to worry me now.

I sighed and bowed my head. Maybe I just had to face all this again and visit Cannock to say goodbye properly—leave with notice this time. Thing is… I just did not want to go back.

After a phone call from Tré confirming the story that Billie and Violet did indeed get stupidly married last night, I was ordered to open my front door. I suspected he’d be there, but when I opened no one was there.

Then I suspected he’d be hiding away so I peered out a little. When I turned my head I saw Tré’s big blue eyes burning into mine; I screamed ever so loudly and dropped my phone.

Tré just stifled a giggle and put a hand to my arm. “Chillax, dude.”

I frowned and picked my phone up from the floor—checking to see if it had broken anywhere. I looked back to Tré; still frowning. “Why don’t you fucking chillax?” I said. “Idiot,” I mumbled as an afterthought, causing Tré to step back a little in shock.

“Uh… is everything okay?” He asked me, real concern and also fear in his voice.

“I’m fine,” I said quietly. “What did you need?”

Tré shrugged and through his hands into his blue jeans front pockets. He was dressed so casual today, and it was weird to see him in such… comfortable clothes after seeing all the photos of him in tight black drainpipes, a black shirt, red tie, and make-up. “Just came to hang out I guess,” He grinned, and so I let him inside, though I didn’t want to.

I wasn’t a bitch; I just hated people.

We sat down on the sofa; trying to piece back everything that happened in the last two days, the one thing playing on our minds being that of Billie and Violet's new marriage.

"Why would he do something like that?" I asked Tré, concern underlying in my tone. "For re-bound? Or was he really that drunk he had a personality transplant? Because I'm sure he wouldn't have done this sober."

Tré nodded, and for awhile he was in deep thought. He slowly looked at me and shrugged. "Well, he's been pretty upset of Adrienne as you can imagine... and he was wasted," He shrugged again and scratched the back of his neck. "I guess it was a drunken rebound."

I raised my brows and giggled. "He's such an idiot. Why does he have to take everything to the extreme?!"

Tré laughed with me and shook his head, he lay back into my sofa and looked to me. "Because he's Billie--he's not the brightest bulb on the planet."

As much as I knew how right Tré was, I still wanted to speak to Billie and ask why he did it. I'm not sure why I was so intent on finding out why because I was supposed to be helping him move on, right?

There's a different between moving on and moving to a whole new planet, though. Marriage is a giant leap, especially for someone who had just processed a divorce. For a moment... I wondered if his divorce was finalised, and if this marriage was actually legal.

Oh Billie, you are a fool sometimes.

***

Mouth agape, I could only listen to Billie’s new train wreck of a bride swear at me constantly. “I mean, what the fuck!? He’s my husband… why do YOU want to come around and screw things up you inconsiderate bitch!”

I was stunned; shocked to the point I couldn’t move or close my mouth, I mean, what was I supposed to say?

I had only been in the house five minutes and I was already been accused of things I hadn't done!

As Billie walked in the room, Violet soon shut up and smiled at her husband, who gave a wonky grin back. Funny thing is though… he sat next to me on the sofa.

“So when are you moving back to England? I mean… you have no job anything… how are you supposed to support yourself?” Violet asked me with a smile… what… was that supposed to make her seem like a nice cow?

“Actually,” I started, a slight grin appearing on my own face. “I had an interview a few days ago to work somewhere.”

“Oh?” She replied with, her cocky smile fading. “Where?”

“Just at the zoo, I mean, I suppose it’s only temporary until I can find a photography job… I mean… I am a photographer… a professional photographer, and with my CV I’m bound to get a job quickly.”

Jakob called out for his father from the top of the stairs, and once again Violet and I were left alone in the room. “What is your problem?” I asked her. She just shrugged in reply. “Well, if you’re going to be like that, I just want you to know that your relationship is just a big drunken mistake,” I stood up off the sofa and grabbed my bag.

So much for first impressions of Billie's new bride--she was a pyscho.

Before I knew it I was being turned around, and at such force I didn’t even realise what was going on before I landed flat on my ass; hard. I felt my eye thump with each pulse, it stung like a bitch.

That’s when it hit me, Violet had hit me. I blinked a few times and looked up still quite daze. “What the… fuck…,” I breathed, quite literally terrified as I had never really been in a lot of fights in my life, and I couldn’t exactly throw a good punch.

I heard other footsteps and figured they were Billie’s. They were fighting, shouting, and then I heard a door slam. All I could do was put my hand to my face and wince in pain. It was like the punch had knocked me into an autistic world.

What the fuck just happened?

Billie squatted down next to me and put his hand to my face, I winced and jumped back. “You’re such a weakling,” He laughed.

I stared up at him—tears welling up in my eyes. It was my entire fault he had kicked Violet out. “I’m so sorry,” I blubbed, Billie just shook his head in reply.

"It wasn't like we were really married, especially because I couldn't even remember marrying her, I was talking to her earlier... I told her how I couldn't do this, I-I'm not ready to be married again, not so early… I’m still… heartbroken,” He said, struggling to get his last words out of his mouth like they burned his throat to say. Billie sighed and stared at my swelling right eye. “I’ll go get you an ice pack,” He said, I nodded as he went off to get one.

So that's why she was pissy--she knew she was losing Billie already. Was she in it for the fame and fortune? I guess I'd never know now.

I stood up and sat back down on the sofa—finally releasing my bag and settling it down on the glass coffee table in front of me. The sofa sunk down next to me and I felt the cool of an ice pack press lightly against my eye. I shifted and turned in my seat to face Billie who was being so kind about all of this.

I smiled lightly—which earned a smile back from Billie, and for a moment, our eyes locked and we were frozen just staring at each other, but when we both heard one of the boys coming down the stairs we shifted in our seats and went back to talking casually.

Leaving that thick line of… whatever it was floating above us as we went on with our… slightly normal lives.