In My Mind, Blood Drips From Your Eyes

I took a sip of the hot coffee in my hand and glanced at Craig again. He had joined me on the couch five minutes ago without a word. He just sat there, staring at me. I wasn't about to speak first though, if he wanted to know what happened then he was going to have to ask first.

I took another sip of my coffee.

He continued staring.

I sighed and ran a hand through my messy hair. I need a shower.

"What happened, Alex?" Craig finally asked what I knew was coming. "Why did you run away?"

I sat up and turned to face him better, bringing my legs under me and crossing them. I thought about last night and the frustration I had felt at dinner came creeping back. "I just couldn't stand it anymore. They were forcing me to live this...this cookiecutter life. The one they had all planned out for me."

I looked down at my hands. I didn't know how much I wanted him to know at the moment.

"They were angry with the person I've become. I think they were trying to punish me, trying the kill the new me in hopes of getting the push-over daughter they used to have. The one who would just take their shit without even questioning. But I'm sick of it. I'm not that innocent little ignorant girl anymore. I've seen how things really are. How horrible life can be. I'm not going to sit back and let them make it even worse."

"Okay, so are you saying you're not going back?" Craig looked like he was still trying to decode what I'd just said.

"I'm not going back," I clarified. Once I said that, my heart dropped. So, I'm not going home, where am I supposed to go? I've got nowhere to go and no one to help me. Well, except Craig, but I couldn't ask anymore from him. I mean, we barely knew each other, even though we were family.

"What's wrong?" I guess my face showed all my worries becuase Craig reached over and put a comforting hand on my shoulder. I looked up at him and I knew the helplessness I felt inside was written all over. "Don't worry, Alexis. Everythings going to be okay. I'm going to help you figure this all out."

"No."

"No? What do you mean?"

"I can't ask you to do that. Take care of me. I can't do it. I have to figure this out on my own. I don't want to bring you down with me. You seem like you've got a lot going for you, I don't want to mess with that."

"God, what happened to you? You used to be one the happiest, most up-beat people I knew. Why did you change so much? Where did the girl I used to know go?"

She died. Along time ago. But I could never tell him that, so I stayed silent.

"Listen to me, Alex. You're family, no matter what. And family is supposed to be there for each other, so that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to help you work this out, just until I'm confident you can hold your own. And don't even bother arguing with me. And no, you won't mess anything up for me. So, don't worry," he grabbed my hand and gave it a comforting squeeze.

Maybe things will turn out okay. Maybe I should just let Craig help me. At least for a little bit. What else am I going to do?

I looked up at Craig and his warm smile. I haven't felt like this in a long time. Like someone actually cares what's going to happen to me. I can't say no, that would just be stupid.

"Okay." Craig's smile grew. "But only for a little bit."

"Alright, that works for me," he said, pulling me in for a hug. "Now, how about some breakfast?"

"Oh, uh, erm, actually can I take a shower?"

"Sure, you know where the bathroom is. Everything you need is in there."

I hopped off the couch, "Thanks. Oh, and Craig?"

"What's up?"

"Please don't tell Aunt Karen about me, at least not yet."

"Of course," he smiled as I ran up the stairs.

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I jumped down the last three steps, my wet hair slapping against by back as I pranced into the kitchen where I found Craig and Max eating breakfast.

"You look better," Craig commented.

"Thanks," I replied sarcastically, narrowing my eyes at him.

"Oh, no, not like that. You just, uh, hmm..."

"You look happier than you did last night," Max finished.

"Yeah, that's what I meant."

I laughed, "Don't worry about it, I knew what you meant." It was true, the shower along with mine and Craig's talk had revitalized me and brought a little of the old me back. I was happier already and I had only been gone less than twelve hours.

"So, what do you want to do today, Alex?"

"I don't know... nothing?"

Craig laughed, "Well, you want to come with us to the studio and watch my band practice? I know how much you've always loved music."

"You're in a band? Seriously?"

"Yeah."

"That's so cool!"

"I'm in it, too," Max piped up like the little brother that always gets overlooked.

I laughed, "Awesome! I'd love to come watch you guys!"

"Kay, we want to leave in like five minutes. Can you be ready?" Craig asked.

"Yepp," I headed upstairs. Five minutes later, and much to Craig and Max's suprise, we were sitting in Craig's car headed to the studio. I guess they expected me to take longer than the time they gave me because when I came down the stairs after getting ready the two were lounging on the couch, shoes off, feet up on the coffee table, and a beer in hand.

I was not expecting the studio to look anything like the building we pulled up to. So, when the car stopped I wasn't sure if I should get out or not. The boys got out and turned to face the car with expectant faces.

"Oh," I mouthed and laughed as I scrambled out of the car. As we walked up to the large building, I tilted my head up to see just how tall it was. It was huge. Just how big is their band? We entered the building and headed to the front desk.

"Hey, Max, Craig. Who'd this?" The receptionist who looked to be in her late fourties was a friendly looking brunette with the brightest blue eyes and a friendly smile.

"Hey Betty. This is Alexis, my cousin. She's going to be hanging with us upstairs today."

"How fun. It's nice to meet you, sweetie."

"Nice to meet you, too," I replied.

"You guys can go on up."

"Thanks, Betty," Max winked at her as he touched the back of my elbow, steering me towards an elevator.

Once we were upstairs, I was in heaven. This was what I always dreamt about. I walked towards the controls set up in front of the glass. Looking into the recording room, I lightly ran my hands along the keys on the table in front of me. A huge smile broke across my face. This is where I belonged.

"Happy?" Craig came up and put an arm around my shoulders.

"Very," I smiled and hugged him, just as Max, Robert and one other boy I didn't know walked into the recording room and started setting up.